Topic 10: Parental Guidance
About this episode
This episode explores the impact of parental issues on children, including parentification and mental health crises.
What happens when the child isn't the problem? When you sit a kid down to talk through their "behavior," and you realize the real story is happening at home? In this episode of Breaking Formation, we explore parentification, parental mental illness, and the quiet ways teens learn to survive when family dynamics get turned upside down. Hosted by retired Air Force Colonel Merryl Tengesdal and child psychotherapist Shea Phinney, MFT, this conversation goes deep into what it means when kids become the parent—the oldest sibling making sure homework gets done (often called "Eldest Daughter Syndrome"), the teen tiptoeing around a parent's rage, and the child learning to read a room before they've learned to read a book. Drawing on Shea's years working in child protective services, this episode unpacks how therapists create safety for children, how to help a young person understand that their parent's struggles are not their fault, and what mandated reporting really looks like. Merryl and Shea also open up with personal anecdotes from their own single-parent households, sharing honest, sometimes funny reflections on the moments that shaped them. WHAT WE COVER IN THIS EPISODE…
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