The Biggest Mistake In Dating: What We Learned The Hard Way (So You Don't Have To)

The Biggest Mistake In Dating: What We Learned The Hard Way (So You Don't Have To)

From Dateable: Your insider's look into modern dating and relationships by Yue Xu and Julie Krafchick

May 8, 2026 · 26 min

About this episode

The episode discusses the common mistake of hoping partners will change and the importance of accepting them as they are.

What if one of the biggest mistakes in dating is also one of the most common—and hardest to admit? If you’re hoping someone will change or dating someone for their potential instead of who they are right now, you may already be setting the relationship up to fail. In this episode, we explore why we so often expect partners to change for love, how this usually leads to disappointment, and what it means to accept someone as they are – while still being honest about needs, preferences, and deal-breakers. Enjoy! - Take the Dating Archetypes quiz now: https://howtobedateable.com/ Read our book: How To Be Dateable: The Essential Guide To Finding Your Person and Falling in Love: https://howtobedateable.com/ Try the Dateable AI Dating Coach: Get personalized advice trained on our years of podcast episodes, courses and frameworks: https://studio.com/dateable Follow us @dateablepodcast, @juliekrafchick and @nonplatonic. Check out our website for more content. Also listen to our other podcasts The Psychology of Relationships and Exit Interview available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts. WE WROTE A BOOK! HOW TO BE DATEABLE (Simon & Schuster) is available now…

People in this episode

Hosts: Yue Xu, Julie Krafchick

Topics covered

  • dating mistakes
  • relationship expectations
  • personal growth
  • acceptance
  • communication

Keywords

  • dating
  • relationships
  • expectations
  • personal growth
  • communication
  • acceptance
  • deal-breakers

Sponsors

Avocado Green Mattress, Quince, Brick

Mentioned in this episode

Organizations: Dateable AI Dating Coach

Books & works: How To Be Dateable: The Essential Guide To Finding Your Person and Falling in Love, How To Be Dateable

More episodes of Dateable: Your insider's look into modern dating and relationships

Explore listener stats, chart rankings, contacts and more on the Dateable: Your insider's look into modern dating and relationships podcast page.