The Biggest Mistake In Dating: What We Learned The Hard Way (So You Don't Have To)
From Dateable: Your insider's look into modern dating and relationships by Yue Xu and Julie Krafchick
May 8, 2026 · 26 min
About this episode
The episode discusses the common mistake of hoping partners will change and the importance of accepting them as they are.
What if one of the biggest mistakes in dating is also one of the most common—and hardest to admit? If you’re hoping someone will change or dating someone for their potential instead of who they are right now, you may already be setting the relationship up to fail. In this episode, we explore why we so often expect partners to change for love, how this usually leads to disappointment, and what it means to accept someone as they are – while still being honest about needs, preferences, and deal-breakers. Enjoy! - Take the Dating Archetypes quiz now: https://howtobedateable.com/ Read our book: How To Be Dateable: The Essential Guide To Finding Your Person and Falling in Love: https://howtobedateable.com/ Try the Dateable AI Dating Coach: Get personalized advice trained on our years of podcast episodes, courses and frameworks: https://studio.com/dateable Follow us @dateablepodcast, @juliekrafchick and @nonplatonic. Check out our website for more content. Also listen to our other podcasts The Psychology of Relationships and Exit Interview available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts. WE WROTE A BOOK! HOW TO BE DATEABLE (Simon & Schuster) is available now…
People in this episode
Hosts: Yue Xu, Julie Krafchick
Topics covered
- dating mistakes
- relationship expectations
- personal growth
- acceptance
- communication
Keywords
- dating
- relationships
- expectations
- personal growth
- communication
- acceptance
- deal-breakers
Sponsors
Avocado Green Mattress, Quince, Brick
Mentioned in this episode
Organizations: Dateable AI Dating Coach
Books & works: How To Be Dateable: The Essential Guide To Finding Your Person and Falling in Love, How To Be Dateable
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