The Incompetent Stalker

The Incompetent Stalker

From Illuminating Hope by Hope House, Inc

January 28, 2026 · 5 min · Season 4 · Episode 4

About this episode

This episode explores the dynamics of stalking behavior often minimized as awkwardness, emphasizing the importance of boundaries and survivor safety.

Episode 4: The Incompetent Suitor The incompetent suitor is a type of stalker whose behavior is often minimized as awkwardness, misunderstanding, or “not knowing better.” In this episode, we explore stalking driven by loneliness or desire, where the goal is access not connection. We discuss why repeated advances after rejection are harmful, how distress is often ignored or dismissed, and how social pressure frequently shifts responsibility onto the victim. The episode also addresses disability and neurodiversity with care making clear that understanding context never excuses harm. This conversation reinforces that discomfort is a valid boundary and that survivors are not responsible for educating others at the expense of their safety. Understanding this pattern helps survivors trust their instincts and prioritize safety. Stalking Risk Profile. (n.d.). Types of stalking . https://www.stalkingriskprofile.com/what-is-stalking/types-of-stalking Host: Tina Johnson If you are in an emergency, call or text 9-1-1 . For information about our services and how Hope House can help, call our 24-Hour Hotline at 816-461-HOPE (4673) or the National Domestic Violence Hotline 800-799-7233…

People in this episode

Host: Tina Johnson

Topics covered

  • stalking
  • mental health
  • boundaries
  • survivor support
  • neurodiversity
  • social pressure

Keywords

  • stalking
  • incompetent suitor
  • boundaries
  • survivor
  • neurodiversity
  • social pressure
  • safety

Mentioned in this episode

Organizations: Hope House, Inc, National Domestic Violence Hotline, Stalking Risk Profile

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