About this episode

Megan Ashley discusses the challenges of forgiveness, the urge for retaliation, and trusting God as our defender.

Hey Fam! In Totality is back this week and I'm here with the team for a conversation about forgiveness, anger, and the call of Romans 12: “Vengeance belongs to Me; I will repay.” Forgiveness sounds beautiful until the wound is fresh and the apology never comes. So, today, I open up about my struggle with wanting to defend myself, have the last word, or “get a lick back” when I feel wronged. We unpack what it looks like to trust God as our defender, lay the urge to retaliate on the altar, and surrender the outcome instead of waiting for God to “get them” on our behalf. We also talk through the difference between forgiveness and reconciliation, why forgiveness doesn’t mean ignoring abuse or automatically restoring access, and how hurt can turn into anger, defensiveness, or the urge to clap back. The team shares what it looks like to pause, pray, name the real wound, and invite the Holy Spirit into hard conversations. If you’re struggling to forgive someone who hurt you, waiting for an apology you may never receive, wrestling with bitterness, or trying to handle conflict in a way that honors Christ, this episode is for you. My prayer is that this conversation helps…

People in this episode

Host: Megan Ashley

Topics covered

• forgiveness
• anger
• trusting God
• retaliation
• healing
• conflict resolution

Mentioned in this episode

Books & works: Romans 12

More episodes of In Totality with Megan Ashley

• EP 127: When Heroes Fall: How to Heal When Christian Leaders Disappoint You Ft. Lisa Fields · September 8, 2026 · 1h 6m
• EP 126: When God Moves Suddenly: Waiting, Obedience & Answered Prayer · September 1, 2026 · 59 min
• EP 125: Honor Thy Mother: Healing Mother Wounds Without Ignoring the Pain · August 25, 2026 · 1h 24m
• EP 123: Put Your Armor On: How to Keep Fighting When You’re Weary · July 28, 2026 · 1h 5m

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