80% of Your Identity Was Set Before 12… Here’s the Problem

80% of Your Identity Was Set Before 12… Here’s the Problem

From Married Game Podcast by Keith Yackey

April 24, 2026 · 51 min

About this episode

Tanner Wendell discusses the impact of early childhood development on masculinity and relationships in men.

In this episode of the Married Game Podcast, we sit down with Tanner Wendell , a family leadership coach and founder focused on helping high-performing men build structure, discipline, and leadership at home—not just in business. And what he shares in this conversation will challenge the way you think about masculinity, relationships, and fatherhood… Most men never actually become men. They grow older. They make money. They build lives. But deep down—they’re still being run by the same patterns, fears, and conditioning formed as boys. Tanner breaks down why ages 9–11 are the most critical years in a boy’s development , how identity is formed before we even have language, and why so many high-performing men are silently struggling in their marriages, confidence, and leadership. We get into: Why your son will become you… whether you like it or not The “little boy” running most men’s decisions (especially in relationships) Why successful men often feel powerless at home How identity actually shapes your results—and how to change it The missing rite of passage from boyhood to manhood And what fathers must do NOW before it’s too late This isn’t theory. This is the stuff that…

People in this episode

Host: Keith Yackey

Guest: Tanner Wendell

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