You Know What You Should Do!

About this episode

Michael Comyn reflects on the hidden tension inside unsolicited advice and explores the difference between fixing and listening.

Before offering advice, ask a quieter question “You know what you should do.” Five familiar words, usually offered with kindness, sometimes with genuine care. Yet when we hear them, something small inside us can quietly deflate. In this episode of Mind the Gap , Michael Comyn reflects on the hidden tension inside unsolicited advice. When someone brings us a problem, are they really asking for a solution, or are they asking to be heard? Drawing on his experience as a coach and communicator, Michael explores the difference between fixing and listening, and why the urge to solve someone else’s difficulty may sometimes be about easing our own discomfort. Before the advice arrives, there may be a better question to ask. What does this person actually need from me right now?

People in this episode

Host: Michael Comyn

Topics covered

• unsolicited advice
• listening
• coaching
• communication
• emotional support

Keywords

• advice
• listening skills
• coaching
• emotional intelligence
• communication

More episodes of Mind the Gap

• Shut Up. Let It Land. · April 11, 2026 · 7 min
• The Good Student Leaves · April 4, 2026 · 8 min
• When Conversation Stops Being Shared- When bores bore each other. · March 28, 2026 · 10 min
• When did we stop looking? · March 21, 2026 · 11 min
• Contentment in a Burning World · March 7, 2026 · 18 min
• The Smile That Isn’t Yours · February 28, 2026 · 15 min