About this episode

The episode features a satirical interview with villains from the Castlevania show, exploring their motivations and stereotypes.

Whispers and murmuring, interrupted by a gavel. Archie: “Welcome applicants, to your initial interview for the University for Aspiring Dark Lords and assorted Evil Bastards. Before we get into the questions proper, I’d like to do a general inquest into your individual motivations. You know: Why do you want to be a mega villain? That sorta thing. Let’s start with you, the pasty lady with the long nails. What’s your name and tell us your motives. Carm: “I am Carmilla, and I will rule over this world. Unlike those childish men.” Archie: “Ok…anything else? What are you qualifications for ruling the world?” Carm: “Those manchildren hoard and waste power that I deserve, and I’m going to take it and use better than any of them.” Archie: “Ok, that’s more of a restatement than anything. I get what you’re saying. The penis is evil, hail the uterus and all that. But why do you specifically-“ Carm: “Because I deserve power. I endured the stupidity of men for far too long, and now I’ll take power for myself.” Archie: “Ok, so you’re just a stereotype of a stereotype of the neo-feminist, with not much else going on. Got it.” Carm: “I am an empowered legend!” Archie: “Your gangly armed melanin…

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