What People Pleasing Is Costing You | Inner Mentor 18 | #220

What People Pleasing Is Costing You | Inner Mentor 18 | #220

From The Inner Entrepreneur by Paul Ryan

June 13, 2026 · 9 min · Episode 224

About this episode

Paul Ryan reflects on the costs of people pleasing and self-abandonment through the story of skydiving instructor Dave Hartsock's heroic sacrifice.

In this Inner Mentor episode, Paul reflects on a remarkable true story of courage and sacrifice. When skydiving instructor Dave Hartsock realised that a catastrophic parachute failure would end in disaster, he made a split-second decision to place himself between his student and the ground, absorbing the full impact and leaving himself paralysed. Years later, when asked if he would do it again, his answer was simple: "Absolutely." But this episode is not really about skydiving. It is about the quieter forms of self-sacrifice that many of us make every day. Paul explores how people often abandon their own dreams, intuition, values, and desires in order to gain approval, avoid disappointment, or live up to the expectations of others. While most of us will never be called upon to make a heroic life-or-death sacrifice, many spend years sacrificing themselves in far less visible ways. Drawing on lessons from philosophy, personal development, and his own life experience, Paul challenges the belief that putting yourself first is selfish. Instead, he explores the difference between selfishness and self-care, and argues that the greatest service we can offer the world is to become the…

People in this episode

Host: Paul Ryan

Topics covered

  • self-sacrifice
  • self-abandonment
  • people pleasing
  • personal development
  • courage
  • self-care

Keywords

  • people pleasing
  • self-sacrifice
  • self-care
  • personal development
  • courage
  • values
  • intuition

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