About this episode

JJ Bola discusses the performance of masculinity and its impact on boys and men.

How often have you heard masculinity described as “toxic”, “fragile”, or “in a crisis”? JJ Bola - writer, former youth worker, and UNHCR Ambassador - tries to go deeper in understanding how society is failing boys and men. In this episode, JJ Bola describes masculinity as a performance that we require boys to learn; along the way stifling their individuality and emotional health. Different societies have different myths about masculinity, and JJ Bola is able to draw on his experiences as a Congolese man growing up in London to show how diverse these ideas are. If we could discard the performance of masculinity and allow boys to grow up free and to be who they are, we are likely to see the benefits in love and sex, politics, competitive sports and mental health. JJ Bola was born in Kinshasa in the Democratic Republic of the Congo. He grew up in London and has written two novels - No Place to Call Home and The Selfless Act Of Breathing - as well as three collections of poetry - Elevate, Daughter of the Sun and WORD - and a non-fiction book about masculinity and the patriarchy, Mask Off: Masculinity Redefined. This week’s episode takes a slightly different format: Andrew interviews…

People in this episode

Host: Andrew G. Marshall

Guest: JJ Bola

Topics covered

• masculinity
• emotional health
• identity
• cultural myths
• mental health

Keywords

• toxic masculinity
• emotional health
• masculinity performance
• cultural identity
• mental health

Mentioned in this episode

Organizations: UNHCR

Places: Kinshasa, Democratic Republic of the Congo, London

More episodes of The Meaningful Life with Andrew G. Marshall

• Terry Real: The Five Traps that Undermine Your Love & One Simple Solution · June 1, 2026 · 54 min
• Helen Tower & Lisa Arends: Infidelity: Lessons from My Recovery · May 25, 2026 · 1h 2m
• Viv Groskop: How to be Heard, Really Heard · May 11, 2026 · 1h 0m

Explore listener stats, chart rankings, contacts and more on the The Meaningful Life with Andrew G. Marshall podcast page.