About this episode

Dr. Diana Hill discusses self-righteous anger and maintaining kindness in conflict with Dr. Joseph Ciarrochi.

On The Wise Effort show, Diana Hill talks with Dr. Joseph Ciarrochi, a researcher in process-based therapy and ACT, about self-righteous anger and how to stay honest and kind when others aren’t. They explore the psychology of getting “hijacked” in conflict, describing outrage and being right as an addiction (experiential attachment) distinct from experiential avoidance, with different intervention implications. Using examples like a conflict with neighbors, online outrage, and relationship fights, they discuss wise distance, not adding fuel to the fire, asserting boundaries when effective, and directing core human yearnings (competence, connection, purpose, meaning, orientation, and feeling) toward what truly satisfies rather than empty status pursuits. Related Resources Get enhanced show notes for this episode Become a Wise Effort Community member Sign up for my newsletter Order my book, Wise Effort: How to Focus Your Genius Energy on What Matters Most , and receive special bonus gifts. Diana's Events See Diana at an upcoming event Connecting With Diana Subscribe for free on Apple Podcasts and Spotify . Leave a 5-star review on Apple so people like you can find the show. Follow…

People in this episode

Host: Dr. Diana Hill

Guest: Dr. Joseph Ciarrochi

Topics covered

• self-righteous anger
• conflict resolution
• psychology
• boundaries
• human yearnings
• kindness

Keywords

• self-righteous anger
• conflict
• kindness
• psychology
• boundaries
• outrage
• human yearnings

Mentioned in this episode

Organizations: Tell the Truth Salon Series

Books & works: Wise Effort: How to Focus Your Genius Energy on What Matters Most

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• The Science of Transformation and Imagination With Cassandra Vieten · January 26, 2026 · 55 min

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