You're Making Your Insomnia Worse (But Not in the Way You Think)
About this episode
The episode discusses the distinction between clean pain and dirty pain in relation to insomnia and how reframing these concepts can alleviate suffering.
What if a huge portion of your sleep-related suffering is actually optional? That might sound dismissive—it's not. Stick with me, because this reframe changed how I think about insomnia, and I think it can do the same for you. The concept: Clean pain vs. Dirty pain This idea comes from Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), and it's beautifully simple. Clean pain is the unavoidable stuff. It's the fatigue after a rough night. The frustration of lying awake at 3 a.m. The sadness, the anxiety, the heaviness. These feelings are real, and they're a natural part of being human. You don't need to fix them or make them go away—they belong here. Dirty pain is the suffering we pile on top. It's the catastrophizing and self-criticism: "If I don't fall asleep in the next twenty minutes, tomorrow is ruined." "What's wrong with me? Everyone else can sleep." It's the desperate struggle to force yourself to relax, which—as you've probably noticed—has the opposite effect. Dirty pain shows up in a lot of familiar ways. It's when you evaluate your night in the most extreme terms possible. It's when you never pause to question the story you're telling yourself about what poor sleep means. It's…
People in this episode
Host: Ivo H.K.
Topics covered
- insomnia
- mental health
- self-criticism
- pain management
- sleep disorders
Mentioned in this episode
Organizations: Acceptance and Commitment Therapy
More episodes of Former Insomniac by End Insomnia
- Why "I'll be Happy When I Sleep Again" is a Trap
- You Don't Have to Give Up Coffee to Overcome Insomnia
- Why Your Nervous System Isn't Broken (Even When It Feels Like It)
- The Counterintuitive Rule for What To Do When You Can't Sleep
- What If You Stopped Trying to Sleep Tonight?
- Try Singing Your Worst Fear About Sleep Tonight (Seriously)
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