This Isn't Your Parent's PDA

This Isn't Your Parent's PDA

From NeuroDiverse Christian Couples by Dr. Stephanie Holmes

May 25, 2026 · 58 min

About this episode

The episode explores the complexities of Pathological Demand Avoidance and its impact on relationships and identity.

When we were kids, PDA meant public displays of affection. Now, apparently, it means pathological demand avoidance — which is significantly less fun at family gatherings. In this episode of Just the Guys, the guys wander through the tangled forest of demand avoidance, rejection sensitivity, imposter syndrome, diagnosis, stubbornness, anxiety, and why taking out the trash can somehow become an existential crisis. Is PDA just being hardheaded? Is it anxiety? Is it fear of failure? Is it all caps STUBBORN? The conversation wrestles with the difference between rebellion, overwhelm, autonomy, and nervous-system panic while also digging into how autism, rejection sensitivity, and shame can quietly shape marriages, parenting, work, and identity. Along the way, there are stories about late-life autism diagnosis, self-worth, being terrified of feedback, spectacular failures, emotional growth, and why understanding the why behind behavior matters more than simply yelling louder about the behavior itself. Basically: four guys trying to understand why human beings are weird while occasionally making fun of themselves in the process. Which is the whole show. Topics include: Pathological…

People in this episode

Host: Dr. Stephanie Holmes

Topics covered

  • Pathological Demand Avoidance
  • Rejection Sensitivity
  • Autism & diagnosis
  • Emotional regulation & relationships
  • Self-worth
  • Shame
  • Fear of failure vs defiance

Keywords

  • PDA
  • rejection sensitivity
  • autism
  • anxiety
  • emotional growth
  • self-worth
  • feedback
  • existential crisis

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