
461. A Little More Social with Nicholas Epley
From Psychologists Off the Clock by Debbie Sorensen, Jill Stoddard, Yael Schonbrun, Michael Herold & Emily Edlynn
May 26, 2026 · 51 min · Episode 461
About this episode
Nicholas Epley discusses the benefits of connecting with strangers and the psychological barriers that prevent us from doing so.
When was the last time you sparked up a conversation with a stranger and surprised yourself with how good it felt? Behavioral scientist Nicholas Epley , author of A Little More Social , returns to the podcast to discuss with Michael why we systematically underestimate how positively strangers respond, how connection supports happiness, health, and longevity, and the key mechanisms behind our social pessimism (misjudging warmth vs. competence, overlooking reciprocity, and self-fulfilling avoidance). Nicholas shares research on how quickly people update after a conversation and how fast those gains can fade, plus practical “easy choice” experiments like asking someone to take your photo or simply asking, “Can you tell me your story?” Plus, in a special post-interview discussion, listener-turned-friend of Michael’s, therapist Dr. Jennifer Kauder, joins Michael to reflect on voice vs. text, comfort-zone challenges, and why real-time connection changes everything. Listen and Learn: The surprising benefits of connecting with people you don't know, and why our minds trick us into fearing these interactions that can lengthen and enrich our lives Psychological…
People in this episode
Host: Michael
Guest: Nicholas Epley
Topics covered
- social connection
- behavioral science
- happiness
- health
- longevity
- overcoming social anxiety
Keywords
- social interaction
- connection
- psychological traps
- happiness
- longevity
- self-fulfilling avoidance
- reciprocity
Mentioned in this episode
Books & works: A Little More Social
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