Your Child Is Not Your Co-Parent | part 2

Your Child Is Not Your Co-Parent | part 2

From The ADHD Parenting Podcast by The ADHD Parenting Podcast

December 10, 2025 · 23 min · Episode 42

About this episode

Ryan and Mike discuss the pitfalls of emotional-validation parenting for children with ADHD and emphasize the need for clear leadership.

This is part 2 of "Your Child Is Not Your Co-Parent". Ryan and Mike continue examining why popular “gentle” and heavy emotional-validation parenting approaches often backfire for kids with ADHD. They break down the research, explain the leadership needs of ADHD brains, and outline why overtalking, overprocessing, and overnegotiating increase dysregulation rather than calming it. Find Mike @ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ www.grownowadhd.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠ & on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ IG⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find Ryan @ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ www.adhddude.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠ & on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Youtube⁠⁠⁠ {{chapters}} [00:00:00] Start [00:00:46] Rise of emotional-validation parenting [00:01:58] Why emotional processing overwhelms ADHD brains [00:02:48] ADHD kids’ need for clear leadership and hierarchy [00:05:20] How “armchair therapy” increases dysregulation [00:07:07] Why too much talking makes tasks feel bigger [00:08:29] Non-hierarchical relationships and rising anxiety [00:10:08] Impact of inconsistent leadership [00:12:26] Comfort-zone parenting and avoidance [00:13:58] The “four D’s” and building flexibility [00:15:48] How avoidance worsens anxiety and rigidity [00:17:13] How guidance—not rescue—builds confidence…

People in this episode

Hosts: Ryan, Mike

Topics covered

  • parenting styles
  • ADHD
  • emotional validation
  • leadership in parenting
  • dysregulation
  • anxiety
  • flexibility

Keywords

  • ADHD parenting
  • emotional validation
  • dysregulation
  • leadership
  • anxiety
  • parenting styles
  • flexibility

Mentioned in this episode

Organizations: www.grownowadhd.com, www.adhddude.com, IG, Youtube

Books & works: Your Child Is Not Your Co-Parent, Journal of Early Adolescence, Journal of Clin

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