Girl, It’s Not Gastro, It’s Perfectionism.

Girl, It’s Not Gastro, It’s Perfectionism.

May 22, 2026 · 37 min

About this episode

This episode explores the impact of chronic perfectionism on self-worth and offers actionable strategies to cope with it.

Ever feel like staying up for hours perfecting a single email, or completely paralyzed by the fear of failing at a new project? In this episode of But Are You Happy, host Ashani Dante pulls back the curtain on the sneaky reality of chronic perfectionism. We’re moving beyond the surface level to explore the inner turmoil and emotional load that comes with tying your entire self-worth to your performance. Joining the conversation is clinical psychologist Anita Shimmins from Inlight Psychology to unpack why we carry this deep underlying fear of failure and how it subtly infiltrates our work, our parenting, and our relationships. Together, Ashani and Anita explore why perfectionism is actually a protective coping strategy built to shield us from shame. You will learn the distinct psychological archetypes of perfectionism, how chronic pressure can show up physically in the body, and why hitting a major life goal often brings a temporary wave of relief rather than true joy. More importantly, this episode breaks down actionable, evidence-based strategies from schema and exposure therapy, sharing how to actively test your fears by making small mistakes on purpose and how to start…

People in this episode

Host: Ashani Dante

Guest: Anita Shimmins

Topics covered

Keywords

Mentioned in this episode

Organizations: Inlight Psychology

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