Your Body Keeps Score When You Stop Feeling (The Attachment Style Nobody Talks About)

Your Body Keeps Score When You Stop Feeling (The Attachment Style Nobody Talks About)

From I Wish You Knew by Adam Lane Smith & Andrey Korikov

February 20, 2026 · 1h 23m · Episode 120

About this episode

The episode explores the impact of disorganized attachment and dissociation on relationships and emotional health through a conversation with Raina.

She schedules her crying every week. She hasn't processed a single painful experience in her entire life. And her body is keeping score. Raina is a brand strategist, agency owner, mother of two, and one of the most high-functioning people you'll ever meet. She's also been running on pure survival mode since childhood; dissociating from every emotion that slowed her down and treating the people around her like objects she navigates around instead of humans she connects with. In this episode, Adam breaks down how quiet disorganized attachment combined with autistic features creates a double-layered wall between someone and every person who's ever tried to love them. He explains why "understanding why someone hurt you" isn't the same as forgiving them; it's actually stripping them of their humanity. And he walks Raina through the exact moment her nervous system learned that love is just a setup for betrayal. his conversation covers: Why high-functioning women with chronic dissociation often develop autoimmune disorders by their mid-30s The difference between short-term dissociation (useful) and lifelong dissociation (destructive) How your brain processes trauma using left brain…

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