
Why You’re Still Single (It’s Not Bad Luck)
From Seeing Other People by Ilana Dunn
April 28, 2026 · 49 min · Episode 590
About this episode
Amy Chan discusses her new book UNSINGLE and explores the factors that contribute to lasting relationships.
Amy Chan returns to Seeing Other People five years after her first appearance to talk about her new book UNSINGLE and what it actually takes to create a healthy, lasting relationship. We talk about why so many of us keep repeating the same dating patterns, how we're often optimizing for the wrong things, and why chemistry alone isn't enough to build something long-term. Amy shares her “dating funnel” framework to help identify where you're getting stuck, plus the mindset shifts that can help you break out of dating burnout. We also dive into limerence, dating outside your type, and the four pillars of healthy relationships — chemistry, compatibility, timing, and mutuality. Amy explains why the “perfect person at the wrong time is the wrong person,” how to challenge limiting beliefs about love, and the experiment she created that has helped people finally find lasting relationships. ALL links here (submit a Q, pitch yourself to the pod, dating coaching & more) Shop SKIMS Fits Everybody collection at skims.com. Rula patients typically pay $15 per session when using insurance. Connect with quality therapists and mental health experts who specialize in you at…
People in this episode
Host: Ilana Dunn
Guest: Amy Chan
Topics covered
- dating patterns
- healthy relationships
- mindset shifts
- limerence
- compatibility
- dating burnout
Keywords
- dating
- relationships
- chemistry
- compatibility
- limerence
- dating burnout
- mindset shifts
Sponsors
SKIMS, Rula, Quince, Nutrafol
Mentioned in this episode
Books & works: UNSINGLE
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