Why You Keep Saying Sorry (Even When You Did Nothing Wrong)
About this episode
This episode explores the automatic self-blame that occurs after emotionally abusive relationships and the underlying nervous system science.
In this episode, I'm talking about why self-blame becomes almost automatic when you've been in an emotionally abusive or coercively controlling relationship, and why it feels like relief even when it's actually costing you. I get into the nervous system science behind it, specifically how fawning works, how your brain gets wired to connect calm with compliance, and why that wiring doesn't just disappear when the relationship ends. If you have ever cried the whole drive home because you ...
Topics covered
- self-blame
- emotional abuse
- coercive control
- nervous system science
- fawning
- compliance
- relationship dynamics
Keywords
- self-blame
- emotional abuse
- nervous system
- fawning
- compliance
- relationship
- psychology
More episodes of You Are Not Crazy
- Withdrawal, Not Grief: Understanding the Trauma Bond
- Dating After Abuse: Why My Answer Is "Traumatized"
- When Co-Parenting Isn't Safe: The Case for Parallel Parenting
- Why Closure Is a Myth with Najwa Zebian
- Pattern Blindness: Why No One Believes You Until It's Too Late
- The Angry Daughter in Love
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