Insights from recent episode analysis
Audience Interest
- emotional abuse awareness
- narcissistic relationship insights
Podcast Focus
- emotional abuse coaching
- coercive control discussions
Publishing Consistency
- weekly episodes released
- active for four years
Platform Reach
- specific platforms not detected
- total followers unknown
Insights are generated by CastFox AI using publicly available data, episode content, and proprietary models.
Total monthly reach
Estimated from 13 chart positions in 13 markets.
By chart position
- 🇺🇸US · Relationships#1385K to 30K
- 🇨🇦CA · Relationships#1505K to 30K
- 🇬🇧GB · Relationships#1935K to 30K
- 🇳🇱NL · Relationships#4130K to 100K
- 🇩🇰DK · Relationships#2610K to 30K
- Per-Episode Audience
Est. listeners per new episode within ~30 days
25K to 94K🎙 Daily cadence·248 episodes·Last published today - Monthly Reach
Unique listeners across all episodes (30 days)
83K to 312K🇳🇱32%🇺🇸10%🇨🇦10%+10 more - Active Followers
Loyal subscribers who consistently listen
33K to 125K
Market Insights
Platform Distribution
Reach across major podcast platforms, updated hourly
Total Followers
—
Total Plays
—
Total Reviews
—
* Data sourced directly from platform APIs and aggregated hourly across all major podcast directories.
On the show
Recent episodes
It Shouldn't Feel This Confusing: Naming the Cycle of Abuse
Jun 24, 2026
16m 12s
When Love Feels Like a Hostage Situation
Jun 17, 2026
33m 12s
How Manipulators Use Words to Maintain Control
Jun 10, 2026
13m 46s
The Underpinning of All Abuse: Coercive Control with Dr. Christine Cocchiola
Jun 3, 2026
56m 16s
When Co-Parenting Becomes Coercive Control
May 27, 2026
24m 45s
Social Links & Contact
Official channels & resources
Official Website
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| Date | Episode | Description | Length | ||||||
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 6/24/26 | ![]() It Shouldn't Feel This Confusing: Naming the Cycle of Abuse | You know something is wrong, you just cannot name it yet. In this episode, I walk through the cycle of abuse — tension building, explosion, reconciliation, and the illusion of calm — and explain why that cycle is exactly what keeps you hooked. I break down what a trauma bond is, how intermittent reinforcement conditions your nervous system to crave the person who is hurting you, and why your confusion, your self-blame, and your inability to just leave are not weaknesses. They are ... | 16m 12s | ||||||
| 6/17/26 | ![]() When Love Feels Like a Hostage Situation | If you have ever felt like you were walking on eggshells, apologizing for things that made no sense, or grieving a version of someone who seemed to disappear, this episode is for you. I am revisiting one of the most listened-to episodes BPD in romantic relationships with two more years of client work, research, and personal processing behind me. I break down what borderline personality disorder actually is, how it differs from Narcissism even when the lived experience feels nearly identical, ... | 33m 12s | ||||||
| 6/10/26 | ![]() How Manipulators Use Words to Maintain Control | I break down some of the most insidious and subtle ways abusers use language to dominate the narrative and erode your sense of reality. I walk you through five distinct patterns of weaponized communication: emotional manipulation disguised as vulnerability, defensiveness used as a silencing tool, blame-shifting hidden behind false equivalence, coercion dressed up as ultimatums, and silence deployed as punishment. Each example reveals the same underlying strategy — redirecting accountability, ... | 13m 46s | ||||||
| 6/3/26 | ![]() The Underpinning of All Abuse: Coercive Control with Dr. Christine Cocchiola | Dr. Christine Cocchiola is back, and this conversation goes deep. Dr. Christine is a coercive control specialist, therapist, TEDx speaker, and author who trained under the godfather of coercive control, Dr. Evan Stark. In this episode, we get into what coercive control actually is: not a form of abuse, but the underpinning of all abuse. That distinction matters more than most people realize, especially inside a family court system that still does not know what to do with it. We talk about the... | 56m 16s | ||||||
| 5/27/26 | ![]() When Co-Parenting Becomes Coercive Control | If you've ever felt like you're doing everything right — showing up, advocating, holding it together — and still somehow ending up as the problem, this episode is for you. Int his episode, I get honest about what it actually feels like to be in the cycle: the exhaustion of defending yourself against false narratives, the way every act of good parenting gets twisted into evidence against you, and the invisible toll of a system that wasn't designed to recognize coercive control. So many p... | 24m 45s | ||||||
| 5/20/26 | ![]() I'm Not Fucked Up, I'm Detoxing | If you've ever thought "what is wrong with me?" after leaving a toxic relationship — this episode is for you. I break down why the anxiety, hypervigilance, and panic that show up after you leave aren't signs that you're damaged. They're signs that your nervous system did exactly what it was trained to do. I walk you through the difference between anxious attachment and trauma-conditioned hypervigilance, why healing feels worse before it feels better, and what it actually looks lik... | 16m 20s | ||||||
| 5/13/26 | ![]() Walking on Razor Blades: Life with Someone with BPD Description | BPD is often misunderstood, reduced to stereotypes of moodiness or drama — but if you've loved someone with unmanaged borderline personality disorder, you know it feels nothing like that. In this episode, I break down what it actually looks like to be in a relationship with someone who splits, who swings from adoring you to discarding you in an instant, and how you slowly begin to disappear in the process. This isn't about demonizing people with BPD. It's about naming the impact o... | 20m 05s | ||||||
| 5/6/26 | ![]() How I Actually Healed (And Why It Didn't Look the Way I Expected) | People ask me how I healed all the time, and the honest answer is that there is no clean framework I can hand you. In this episode, I share the specific practices that actually made a difference for me — and they are not always the ones you would expect. I talk about why I stopped healing on everyone else's timeline, how I gave myself permission to grieve on a schedule as a single parent, and the journaling practice that helped me separate what was real from what had been distorted.&nbs... | 14m 42s | ||||||
| 4/29/26 | ![]() What I Did When I Couldn't Trust My Own Mind | Before I knew what a trauma bond was, I was hiding my phone under my mattress. I deleted his number, wrote it on a piece of paper, folded it into a journal, and made myself work to find it. At the time I thought I was being ridiculous. Looking back, I was surviving. In this episode, I talk about what it actually looks like to break a trauma bond when you can't go cold turkey — the messy, imperfect, sometimes embarrassing strategies that create just enough friction between the craving an... | 11m 10s | ||||||
| 4/22/26 | ![]() BPD Splitting in Relationships: What It Feels Like and How to Heal | If you've ever felt adored one moment and suddenly on the wrong side of a wall you didn't see coming, this episode is for you. I open with my own experience of being in a relationship where warmth could vanish in an instant — where I replayed conversations trying to find the moment I slipped, and where I slowly became someone whose entire focus was managing another person's emotional state. In this episode, I break down splitting — what it is clinically, what it feels like to be on the receiv... | 23m 09s | ||||||
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| 4/15/26 | ![]() Why They Never See It: The Psychology Behind Why Personality-Disordered People Don't Know They're the Problem | If you've ever wondered why the person who hurt you seems completely unbothered — even convinced they did nothing wrong — this episode is for you. I break down why people with personality disorders genuinely don't experience themselves as disordered, how shame avoidance rewrites their reality, and why no amount of explaining, evidence, or emotional appeals will get them to "see it." Understanding this isn't about giving up — it's about stopping the cycle of trying to reach someone who doesn't... | 15m 06s | ||||||
| 4/8/26 | ![]() Pattern Recognition vs. The Blame Game | There's a difference between someone naming a pattern to seek resolution and someone digging up the past to dodge accountability. If you've ever tried to address what's not working in your relationship and ended up defending yourself instead, this episode is for you. We talk about what healthy accountability actually looks like — and how to recognize when someone is rewriting history to keep you stuck. Support the show *Please Note: there is a long intro that explains my services. If you do n... | 7m 19s | ||||||
| 4/1/26 | ![]() When Mental Illness Becomes an Excuse for Abuse | This month’s Patreon episode dives into a theme that kept surfacing in your questions: When does mental illness explain behavior… and when does it become an excuse? Before answering your submissions, I break down what we actually mean when we talk about pathological abuse — repeated patterns rooted in personality structure, not just “a bad fight” or poor communication. We explore coercive control, gaslighting, intermittent reinforcement, blame shifting, and the power imbalance that defines th... | 27m 14s | ||||||
| 3/25/26 | ![]() How I Help Clients Untangle High-Conflict Divorce | In this episode, I share what it’s really like to support clients through the chaos of high-conflict divorce — when legal processes, endless emails, and contradictory communication make it nearly impossible to think clearly. I talk about how I help clients slow things down, organize what’s actually happening, and find stability in the middle of emotional and legal overwhelm. I also share how confusion becomes one of the main weapons of post-separation abuse, and what I do to help survivors re... | 14m 57s | ||||||
| 3/18/26 | ![]() “No One Sees It” — The Pattern of Covert Abuse (And Why the System Misses It) | “No one sees it. They just think he’s nice.” If you are in a high-conflict divorce or co-parenting dynamic, you probably feel this in your bones. One of the hardest parts of covert abuse is that the “nice” isn’t safe. The "helpfulness" isn’t genuine. It’s strategic. When you are the only one seeing it and reacting to it, you start questioning yourself. In this episode, I talk about what it’s like to live inside a pattern that other people can’t see. Courts, lawyers, evaluators — they ar... | 14m 25s | ||||||
| 3/11/26 | ![]() Wanting Them to Change Isn’t Abuse - Interview with Paul Colaianni | One of the most painful and confusing questions survivors ask is this: “If I want them to change… how is that different from them wanting me to change?” On the surface, it sounds the same. Two people. Both asking for change. But it is not the same. In this episode, I’m joined again by Paul Colaianni of The Overwhelmed Brain and Love and Abuse to unpack the critical difference between wanting harm to stop… and wanting control. We talk about: The difference between self-protection and self... | 42m 37s | ||||||
| 3/4/26 | ![]() “Why Do I Feel Crazy?” — Life Inside a Trauma Bond | This episode puts words to what a trauma bond feels like before there is language for it. The quiet erosion. The logic loops. The way your needs slowly become “too much.” The way calm, rational explanations are used to invalidate your emotional reality. The way you start rehearsing conversations, monitoring your tone, silencing yourself, and shrinking—just to keep the peace. This is not a story about explosive fights or obvious cruelty. It is about subtle control, emotional superiority, and t... | 44m 47s | ||||||
| 2/25/26 | ![]() When Leaving Feels Impossible: The Hidden Reality of Loving Someone With Untreated BPD | Leaving a relationship with someone who has untreated borderline personality traits can feel less like a breakup and more like trying to escape a locked room while being told you’re the one causing the fire. In this episode, I speak directly to the people who are rarely centered in these conversations: the partners who have been living inside someone else’s emotional emergency. The ones who learned to scan tone, timing, silence, and mood shifts just to survive. The ones whose nervous systems ... | 20m 39s | ||||||
| 2/18/26 | ![]() Why They Feel Fine After the Blowup—and You Don’t | In this episode, I talk about what happens after the fight, the discard, or the emotional explosion, and why the aftermath hits you so much harder than it seems to hit them. I break down a pattern I see constantly in emotionally abusive, high-conflict, and narcissistic dynamics: one person unloads their rage, shame, blame, or dysregulation, and then walks away feeling lighter—while the other person is left carrying it. I explain why this isn’t about resolution, communication, or vulnerability... | 11m 30s | ||||||
| 2/11/26 | ![]() Emotional Whiplash, Hypervigilance, and the BPD Cycle of Abuse | How do you survive—and eventually recognize—the BPD cycle of abuse, especially when you are already exhausted, confused, and questioning yourself. In this episode, I break down the cycle as it actually unfolds in real life: The intense honeymoon phase, the sudden emotional whiplash, the accusations and character attacks, the breakups and reconciliations, and the long stretch of chaos that keeps you hooked through intermittent relief. I talk about why this dynamic is so hard to recognize while... | 20m 37s | ||||||
| 2/4/26 | ![]() When They Say You Can’t Communicate | If you’ve ever been told you “can’t communicate” — especially by someone who constantly twists your words or refuses to take accountability — this episode will help you see what’s really happening. I break breaks down how abusers weaponize communication to destabilize you, create confusion, and control the narrative. You’ll learn why phrases like “you’re too blunt” or “you don’t make sense” are often not about clarity at all — they’re about power. You can view my courses here: https://j... | 20m 29s | ||||||
| 1/28/26 | ![]() Letting Go of the Why | When you’ve been in an emotionally abusive relationship, the need for clarity can feel all-consuming. You want to know why they did what they did — why they lied, withdrew, or turned cold. You believe that if you can just understand their behavior, you’ll finally be able to find peace. Clarity from someone who manipulates and distorts reality rarely exists — at least not in the way survivors hope it will. The search for answers becomes part of the trap, keeping you focused on their motives in... | 16m 00s | ||||||
| 1/21/26 | ![]() The Blame Game: A Key Tactic in the Cycle of Emotional Abuse | This episode unpacks what happens when speaking your truth gets twisted into a blame game. You finally name the pattern—gaslighting, neglect, constant eggshells—only to have the conversation hijacked. Suddenly you’re defending a mistake from years ago, a text tone, or an unrelated incident. Instead of accountability, you’re trapped in deflection, false equivalency, and emotional erasure. Jessica breaks down how this tactic shows up in everyday conversations, why it’s such a powerful tool of e... | 9m 52s | ||||||
| 1/17/26 | ![]() When Co-Parenting Messages Make You Doubt Yourself | In this episode, I talk about a communication pattern that so many people experience in emotionally abusive and high-conflict relationships—but rarely have language for. It’s the moment when a message sounds reasonable on paper, calm in tone, even “child-focused”… and yet your body reacts immediately. I walk through what’s happening when someone says all the right things while doing the opposite—hiding control behind concern, and contradiction behind “cooperation.” I use a real client example... | 21m 55s | ||||||
| 1/14/26 | ![]() How Do I Stop Second Guessing Myself After Leaving an Abusive Relationship? | After leaving an abusive relationship, it’s common to find yourself stuck in an exhausting loop of self-doubt. You replay conversations. You question your memory. You wonder if you overreacted—or if maybe it wasn’t that bad. In this episode, I break down why second-guessing yourself after abuse isn’t a flaw—it’s a survival response. I talk about how abusers train you to distrust your own perceptions and why that confusion lingers even after you leave. I also share practical ways to start rebu... | 18m 55s | ||||||
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Chart Positions
13 placements across 13 markets.
Chart Positions
13 placements across 13 markets.

