266. The Check-In Questions I Swear By + Tips For Starting

266. The Check-In Questions I Swear By + Tips For Starting

From Dating Intentionally by Talia Koren

May 26, 2026 · 32 min

About this episode

Talia Koren discusses the importance of communication in relationships and shares structured check-in questions that have helped her and her husband maintain a tension-free relationship.

Communication is the most important thing in a relationship, but no one tells you what good communication actually looks like in practice. In this episode, I'm getting into relationship check-ins: the structured conversations my husband, Johnny, and I have had about 70 times over three years, and the single biggest reason our day-to-day relationship is virtually tension-free. I'm walking you through the exact questions we use (based on the Gottman State of the Union method, with our own additions), how check-ins have actually changed our relationship over time, when to start doing them, how to bring it up with your partner without making it weird, what to do if things get heated, and the most common mistakes people make. At the end, I tackle a dating dilemma about whether to give a great connection another shot after months apart. MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE My original episode on check-ins (ep 14) The Gottman State Of The Union check-in format My post on other check-in formats Free dating guides: datingintentionally.com/gift My episode with Zach Brittle on repair vs resolve THANKS TO OUR PARTNERS Boll & Branch:  Get 15% off the softest bedding at&nbsp…

People in this episode

Host: Talia Koren

Topics covered

  • communication
  • relationship check-ins
  • self-improvement
  • dating advice
  • conflict resolution

Keywords

  • relationship check-ins
  • communication
  • Gottman method
  • dating advice
  • conflict resolution
  • self-improvement
  • dating dilemma

Sponsors

Boll & Branch, Quince, Wayfair

Mentioned in this episode

Organizations: Gottman State of the Union

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