🎙️ Ask Me Anything – E51: When Family Calls You Selfish for Choosing Yourself (And How to Hold Your Ground Without Losing Yourself)
About this episode
In this episode, Kyira Wackett addresses the challenge of standing firm in personal decisions amidst family disappointment and shame.
Have you ever made a decision you knew in your gut was right — then had someone you love tell you it was wrong, until you started doubting everything? Not because new information showed up. Just because their disappointment got so loud it drowned out your own knowing. If you've been there, this episode is for you. This week's question comes from a longtime listener and dear friend, Alice: "My family is devastated that I'm not coming home for a funeral. I had real, legitimate reasons — financial, emotional, logistical — but no one wants to hear them. They're calling me selfish and cold, and part of me is starting to believe them. How do I hold my decision without completely falling apart under the weight of their disappointment?" In this Ask Me Anything episode, I sit with one of the hardest places to stand: holding a decision you know is right while the people who raised you call you selfish. Family shame is different — it has roots, and it knows exactly where to pull. I walk through the difference between guilt ( I did something against my values ) and shame ( I am something wrong ), and why what Alice is feeling is borrowed shame imported from someone else's value system. We…
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