408: What if your blocks to love aren't even yours? (ft. Violet Lange)

About this episode

The episode explores how blocks to love may stem from family lineage and trauma rather than personal issues, featuring insights on the practice of Family Constellations.

Ever felt like there's something blocking you in love — something you can't quite name, but keeps showing up? Maybe you've got anxious, avoidant, or disorganized attachment traits, or you've sacrificed your needs for others or struggled to own your sexual attraction. It's easy to feel like our issues in our sex or loves lives are all our fault, and all ours to fix. But what if something bigger is going on? Here we explore one of the most fascinating -- and still somewhat underground -- healing modalities out there: Constellations (aka Family Constellations). Constellations is the practice of looking at the broader system you come from — your family, your lineage, generations back — to understand why you might be stuck in patterns that don't make sense given your own life experience alone. Here Violet breaks down how blocks to love, intimacy, and connection are often not about you at all, but about grief, trauma, or exclusion that happened long before you arrived. Think: your grandfather came back from war a different man, and somehow, decades later, you can't quite open your heart. Or as one participant put it, "I had no idea that what I was holding onto wasn't even mine." The…

People in this episode

Host: Melanie Curtin

Guest: Violet Lange

Topics covered

• love blocks
• attachment styles
• family constellations
• healing modalities
• intergenerational trauma
• intimacy issues

Keywords

• love
• attachment
• constellations
• healing
• trauma
• intimacy
• relationships

Mentioned in this episode

Organizations: Zulu tradition

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