Ask Lisa: The Psychology of Raising Tweens & Teens

If your child has just come out to you — or you sense they might be questioning their gender identity — you may be wondering what to say, what to do, and how to get this right. This episode is here to help. Dr. Lisa Damour walks parents through one of the most important conversations of adolescence: how to respond when your tween or teen comes out as gay, lesbian, or bi, or expresses a non-traditional gender identity. From what to say in that first moment, to navigating sleepovers, sex, family disclosure, and community attitudes, this episode gives you a clear, compassionate roadmap so you don't have to guess your way through it. 💡 YOU'LL LEARN: - Why your first response matters so much, and the exact words that protect your relationship and your child's trust - How to handle the complicated question of whether to tell your other parent or keep your child's confidence - How to set sleepover and dating boundaries that are fair, consistent, and built on trust, regardless of your child's sexual orientation or gender identity - What to do if your initial reaction missed the mark (and how to repair it) - How to support your LGBTQ+ child even if your community isn't fully accepting (and where to find resources to help) In honor of Pride Month, we're bringing this one back. Every family navigating this deserves guidance they can trust. ________________ GET DR. DAMOUR'S FREE WEEKLY NEWSLETTER Guidance, strategies, and tips delivered straight to your inbox → ⁠https://drlisadamour.com/sign-up-for-my-newsletter/⁠ DR. DAMOUR'S BESTSELLING BOOKS - Untangled: Guiding Teenage Girls Through the Seven Transitions into Adulthood – ⁠https://bit.ly/UntangledBook⁠ - Under Pressure: Confronting the Epidemic of Stress and Anxiety in Girls – ⁠https://bit.ly/UnderPressuretheBook⁠ - The Emotional Lives of Teenagers: Raising Connected, Capable, and Compassionate Adolescents – ⁠https://a.co/d/cbOmTKp⁠ UNTANGLING 10TO20 MEMBERSHIP Premium courses & resources for teens and the adults who care for them → ⁠https://lnkd.in/gr52MB-F⁠ VISIT DR. LISA'S WEBSITE → ⁠https://drlisadamour.com/⁠ ________________ Today's sponsors: iRestore: Receive discounts on their red light therapy devices at ⁠https://www.irestore.com/⁠ Cozy Earth: Get 20% off your order with promo code ASKLISA ⁠https://cozyearth.com/ Jones Road Beauty: Use the code ASKLISA for a free full sized Mascara with your first purchase at ⁠https://www.jonesroadbeauty.com⁠. Momentous: Get up to 35% off your first order with promo code ASKLISA at ⁠https://www.livemomentous.com⁠ ________________ Ask Lisa: The Psychology of Raising Tweens & Teens is the essential podcast for parents seeking expert guidance, tested strategies, and psychological insights on raising kids, especially tweens and teens. Join renowned clinical psychologist Dr. Lisa Damour and former journalist and mom of two Reena Ninan as they explore real-life parenting challenges. Looking to learn more about how to boost kids’ resilience, build their confidence, or support their emotional well-being? Dr. Lisa and Reena have got you covered! Together they address listener questions about stress, anxiety, social media concerns, school pressures, and challenges in peer relationships. Each episode provides practical advice and science-backed solutions to help parents raise resilient, confident, and emotionally healthy kids. Tune in every week for the latest topics in parenting, child psychology, and family wellness. Get answers to your most pressing parenting questions. New episodes drop every Tuesday. ________________ Episode keywords: how to support lgbtq child, my daughter came out as gay, my teen says she is bi, how to support lesbian daughter, parenting lgbtq teens, talking to kids about same sex relationships, lgbtq teen coming out to parents, rules for sleepovers lgbtq, conservative community lgbtq child, is my teen really gay or a phase Podcast keywords: ask lisa podcast, dr lisa damour, reena ninan, psychology, parenting, podcast, teens, tweens, parenting teens, parenting tweens, teen parenting, tween parenting, parenting tips, parenting advice, positive parenting, parenting podcast, teen behavior, tween challenges, raising tweens, raising teens, parenting hacks, parenting help, family dynamics, kids podcast, mental health, teen mental health, attachment styles, emotional intelligence

Does your tween or teen struggle with low confidence and self-esteem? Do you want to cultivate healthy self-compassion and self-worth in them — and in yourself? In this special "Best of Ask Lisa" compilation, clinical psychologist Dr. Lisa Damour and co-host Reena Ninan pull together some of their most powerful conversations on self-esteem, confidence, and self-compassion, covering the full arc of the tween and teen years. Whether your child is drowning in negative self-talk, paralyzed by perfectionism, or just seems to have lost the spark they once had, this episode will help you understand what's normal, what's not, and what actually works. 💡 YOU'LL LEARN: - Why confidence naturally dips around ages 5-9 (and why that doesn't mean you've failed as a parent) - Why girls often experience a sharp confidence drop around age 12, and what's really going on for boys during puberty - The "tributaries and the lake" framework for building self-esteem that lasts across a lifetime - How to respond when your kid spirals into harsh negative self-talk, including the exact phrases Dr. Lisa recommends - Whether it's okay to tell your daughter she's beautiful - How modeling self-compassion is one of the most powerful confidence tools you have This episode draws on insights from guests Dr. Tovah Klein, Dr. Sue Varma, and Dr. Traci Baxley, alongside Dr. Lisa's own research and clinical expertise. Your child's confidence struggles are workable; making small, consistent shifts in how you respond can make a real difference over time. ________________ Today's sponsors: Momentous: Get 5% off your first order with promo code ASKLISA at ⁠https://www.livemomentous.com⁠ Shopify: Sign up for your one-dollar-per-month trial today at ⁠https://www.shopify.com/asklisa⁠ Mill: $75 off with your membership code ASKLISA at ⁠https://www.mill.com/asklisa⁠. Caraway: 10% off your next order with promo code ASKLISA at https://www.carawayhome.com/discount/asklisa ________________ GET DR. DAMOUR'S FREE WEEKLY NEWSLETTER Guidance, strategies, and tips delivered straight to your inbox → ⁠https://drlisadamour.com/sign-up-for-my-newsletter/⁠ DR. DAMOUR'S BESTSELLING BOOKS - Untangled: Guiding Teenage Girls Through the Seven Transitions into Adulthood – ⁠https://bit.ly/UntangledBook⁠ - Under Pressure: Confronting the Epidemic of Stress and Anxiety in Girls – ⁠https://bit.ly/UnderPressuretheBook⁠ - The Emotional Lives of Teenagers: Raising Connected, Capable, and Compassionate Adolescents – ⁠https://a.co/d/cbOmTKp⁠ UNTANGLING 10TO20 MEMBERSHIP Premium courses & resources for teens and the adults who care for them → ⁠https://lnkd.in/gr52MB-F⁠ VISIT DR. LISA'S WEBSITE → ⁠https://drlisadamour.com/⁠ ________________ Ask Lisa: The Psychology of Raising Tweens & Teens is the essential podcast for parents seeking expert guidance, tested strategies, and psychological insights on raising kids, especially tweens and teens. Join renowned clinical psychologist Dr. Lisa Damour and former journalist and mom of two Reena Ninan as they explore real-life parenting challenges. Looking to learn more about how to boost kids’ resilience, build their confidence, or support their emotional well-being? Dr. Lisa and Reena have got you covered! Together they address listener questions about stress, anxiety, social media concerns, school pressures, and challenges in peer relationships. Each episode provides practical advice and science-backed solutions to help parents raise resilient, confident, and emotionally healthy kids. Tune in every week for the latest topics in parenting, child psychology, and family wellness. Get answers to your most pressing parenting questions. New episodes drop every Tuesday. ________________ Episode keywords: teen self-esteem, tween confidence, building confidence in kids, negative self-talk kids, how to raise confident kids, self-esteem middle school, girl confidence drop age 12, boys puberty self-esteem, perfectionism in teens, self-compassion kids, parenting teen girls appearance, how to help insecure teen Podcast keywords: ask lisa podcast, dr lisa damour, reena ninan, psychology, parenting, podcast, teens, tweens, parenting teens, parenting tweens, teen parenting, tween parenting, parenting tips, parenting advice, positive parenting, parenting podcast, teen behavior, tween challenges, raising tweens, raising teens, parenting hacks, parenting help, family dynamics, kids podcast, mental health, teen mental health, attachment styles, emotional intelligence

It's prom season, and one mom is facing a tough call: her son wants to go to an unsupervised after-party two hours away. Other parents are saying yes. Her gut is saying no. And her son is saying he'll skip prom entirely if she doesn't let him go. Whether it's prom, spring break, or any other "big night" moment, dilemmas like this one can keep parents up at night. Should you trust your kid, or should you trust your instincts? Dr. Lisa Damour, clinical psychologist and New York Times bestselling author, and Reena Ninan break it all down with the warmth, honesty, and research-backed guidance parents of teens actually need. No judgment. Just real talk about the hard calls parents need to make. This episode is about every high-stakes moment when your teen's desire for fun and independence collides with your responsibility to keep them safe. And it's about knowing, with confidence, that prioritizing safety IS the right call, even when it's the hard one. 💡 YOU'LL LEARN: - Why your gut feeling about this isn't overreacting (and what the science says about teens, peer groups, and risk) - How to hold a firm safety limit even when every other parent seems to be saying yes - The "third option" strategy: how to get your teen out of all-or-nothing thinking and find an alternative you can both live with - Why explaining the real risks (not just saying "no") changes the conversation entirely - How to survive your teen being mad at you without caving, holding a grudge, or damaging the relationship ________________ Today's sponsors: Understood: Check out Everyone Gets a Juice Box wherever you listen to podcasts. OneSkin: Use the code ASKLISA for 15% off your next purchase at https://www.oneskin.co/ASKLISA. Jones Road Beauty: Use the code ASKLISA for a free Shimmer Face Oil with your first purchase at ⁠https://www.jonesroadbeauty.com⁠. Momentous: Get 5% off your first order with promo code ASKLISA at ⁠https://www.livemomentous.com⁠ ________________ GET DR. DAMOUR'S FREE WEEKLY NEWSLETTER Guidance, strategies, and tips delivered straight to your inbox → ⁠https://drlisadamour.com/sign-up-for-my-newsletter/⁠ DR. DAMOUR'S BESTSELLING BOOKS - Untangled: Guiding Teenage Girls Through the Seven Transitions into Adulthood – ⁠https://bit.ly/UntangledBook⁠ - Under Pressure: Confronting the Epidemic of Stress and Anxiety in Girls – ⁠https://bit.ly/UnderPressuretheBook⁠ - The Emotional Lives of Teenagers: Raising Connected, Capable, and Compassionate Adolescents – ⁠https://a.co/d/cbOmTKp⁠ UNTANGLING 10TO20 MEMBERSHIP Premium courses & resources for teens and the adults who care for them → ⁠https://lnkd.in/gr52MB-F⁠ VISIT DR. LISA'S WEBSITE → ⁠https://drlisadamour.com/⁠ ________________ Ask Lisa: The Psychology of Raising Tweens & Teens is the essential podcast for parents seeking expert guidance, tested strategies, and psychological insights on raising kids, especially tweens and teens. Join renowned clinical psychologist Dr. Lisa Damour and former journalist and mom of two Reena Ninan as they explore real-life parenting challenges. Looking to learn more about how to boost kids’ resilience, build their confidence, or support their emotional well-being? Dr. Lisa and Reena have got you covered! Together they address listener questions about stress, anxiety, social media concerns, school pressures, and challenges in peer relationships. Each episode provides practical advice and science-backed solutions to help parents raise resilient, confident, and emotionally healthy kids. Tune in every week for the latest topics in parenting, child psychology, and family wellness. Get answers to your most pressing parenting questions. New episodes drop every Tuesday. ________________ Episode keywords: prom after party no supervision, teen prom safety, unsupervised teen party, prom night rules, teenager drinking at prom, how to say no to teen, teen peer pressure prom, setting limits with teens, prom after party alcohol, high school party safety, parenting teen boundaries, when to say no teenager, teen safety overnight, prom decisions parents Podcast keywords: ask lisa podcast, dr lisa damour, reena ninan, psychology, parenting, podcast, teens, tweens, parenting teens, parenting tweens, teen parenting, tween parenting, parenting tips, parenting advice, positive parenting, parenting podcast, teen behavior, tween challenges, raising tweens, raising teens, parenting hacks, parenting help, family dynamics, kids podcast, mental health, teen mental health, attachment styles, emotional intelligence

What would YOU do if you discovered your tween or teen was reading explicit fan fiction online? Today’s kids are often learning about sexuality through the internet, often long before parents realize it. How you respond can either shut down communication or open the door to thoughtful, values-based conversations that actually stick. In this episode of Ask Lisa: The Psychology of Raising Tweens & Teens, clinical psychologist Dr. Lisa Damour and journalist Reena Ninan tackle a question many parents are asking: Should we be worried about our kids reading explicit fan fiction? 💡 YOU’LL LEARN: - Why reading explicit fan fiction can be a common, developmentally typical form of exploration - How to talk with your teen about sexual content without shaming or lecturing - How to share your family’s values around healthy intimacy in ways teens can hear - When (and how) to set boundaries without damaging trust - The surprising upsides of fan fiction If you’re feeling confused, uneasy, or unsure about what your kid is encountering online, this episode offers calm, practical guidance to help you stay connected and parent with confidence. ________________ Ask Lisa: The Psychology of Raising Tweens & Teens is the essential podcast for parents seeking expert guidance, tested strategies, and psychological insights on raising kids, especially tweens and teens. Join renowned clinical psychologist Dr. Lisa Damour and former journalist and mom of two Reena Ninan as they explore real-life parenting challenges. Looking to learn more about how to boost kids’ resilience, build their confidence, or support their emotional well-being? Dr. Lisa and Reena have got you covered! Together they address listener questions about stress, anxiety, social media concerns, school pressures, and challenges in peer relationships. Each episode provides practical advice and science-backed solutions to help parents raise resilient, confident, and emotionally healthy kids. Tune in every week for the latest topics in parenting, child psychology, and family wellness. Get answers to your most pressing parenting questions. New episodes drop every Tuesday. ________________ Episode keywords: teens, fan fiction, explicit content, family communication, online safety, romantasy Podcast keywords: ask lisa podcast, dr lisa damour, reena ninan, psychology, parenting, podcast, teens, tweens, parenting teens, parenting tweens, teen parenting, tween parenting, parenting tips, parenting advice, positive parenting, parenting podcast, teen behavior, tween challenges, raising tweens, raising teens, parenting hacks, parenting help, family dynamics, kids podcast, mental health, teen mental health, attachment styles, emotional intelligence

Is your teen pushing for another piercing? Are you feeling torn between setting limits and respecting their self-expression? In this episode of “Ask Lisa: The Psychology of Raising Tweens & Teens,” Dr. Lisa Damour and Reena Ninan take on a question sent directly from a 16-year-old listener: How many piercings should a teen be allowed to have? What starts as a question about jewelry opens up a much bigger conversation about boundaries, autonomy, culture, identity, and healthy parent-teen tension. Together, Lisa and Reena explore why piercings can matter so much to teens, why they can feel so unsettling to parents, and how families can move toward compromise without power struggles. 💡 YOU’LL LEARN: - How piercings function as self-expression and identity exploration during adolescence - How the location of a piercing can affect social and practical considerations - A powerful empathy-based exercise that helps parents and teens break through stalemates - When compromise makes sense… and when it doesn’t Whether you’re navigating piercings, hair color, clothing choices, or the next big boundary your teen wants to test, this episode offers grounded reassurance and practical tools to help you stay connected while holding your values. ________________ Ask Lisa: The Psychology of Raising Tweens & Teens is the essential podcast for parents seeking expert guidance, tested strategies, and psychological insights on raising kids, especially tweens and teens. Join renowned clinical psychologist Dr. Lisa Damour and former journalist and mom of two Reena Ninan as they explore real-life parenting challenges. Looking to learn more about how to boost kids’ resilience, build their confidence, or support their emotional well-being? Dr. Lisa and Reena have got you covered! Together they address listener questions about stress, anxiety, social media concerns, school pressures, and challenges in peer relationships. Each episode provides practical advice and science-backed solutions to help parents raise resilient, confident, and emotionally healthy kids. Tune in every week for the latest topics in parenting, child psychology, and family wellness. Get answers to your most pressing parenting questions. New episodes drop every Tuesday. ________________teens, parents, piercings, boundaries, self-expression, compromise, teen piercings, ear piercing, nose piercing, family conflictask lisa podcast, lisa damour, reena ninan, psychology, parenting, podcast, teens, tweens, parenting teens, parenting tweens, teen parenting, tween parenting, parenting tips, parenting advice, positive parenting, parenting podcast, teen behavior, tween challenges, raising tweens, raising teens, parenting hacks, parenting help, family dynamics, kids podcast, mental health, teen mental health, attachment styles, emotional intelligence

We all want for our kids to build a healthy relationship with food, but it’s not always clear how to make that happen. Special guest Dr. Reshma Shah offers a grounded, practical approach to navigating the common challenges parents face at mealtime. If you’re trying to guide your tween or teen toward healthier eating without power struggles, guilt, or the nightly “just take one bite!” battle, this episode is for you. In this episode of Ask Lisa: The Psychology of Raising Tweens & Teens, Lisa and Reena sit down with Dr. Shah to dig into what really works when it comes to helping kids eat well and feel good about food. Whether your child is picky, stressed about food, obsessed with protein, avoiding vegetables, or simply eating most of their meals away from home, this conversation offers a grounded, judgment-free roadmap for calmer mealtimes and healthier habits. 💡 YOU’LL LEARN: - Why modeling healthy eating matters far more than lecturing about it - How to use low-stress dinner table dynamics to boost kids’ nutrition - How to shift to neutral, non-judgmental language around food - Why family meals carry long-term benefits for mental health, nutrition, and connection If this conversation helps you rethink your family’s approach to food, tell us in the comments! Ask Lisa: The Psychology of Raising Tweens & Teens is the essential podcast for parents seeking expert guidance, tested strategies, and psychological insights on raising kids, especially tweens and teens. Join renowned clinical psychologist Dr. Lisa Damour and former journalist and mom of two Reena Ninan as they explore real-life parenting challenges. Looking to learn more about how to boost kids’ resilience, build their confidence, or support their emotional well-being? Dr. Lisa and Reena have got you covered! Together they address listener questions about stress, anxiety, social media concerns, school pressures, and challenges in peer relationships. Each episode provides practical advice and science-backed solutions to help parents raise resilient, confident, and emotionally healthy kids. Tune in every week for the latest topics in parenting, child psychology, and family wellness. Get answers to your most pressing parenting questions. New episodes drop every Tuesday.healthy eating, picky eating, family meals, nutrition, food relationship, mindful eatingask lisa podcast, dr lisa damour, reena ninan, psychology, parenting, podcast, teens, tweens, parenting teens, parenting tweens, teen parenting, tween parenting, parenting tips, parenting advice, positive parenting, parenting podcast, teen behavior, tween challenges, raising tweens, raising teens, parenting hacks, parenting help, family dynamics, kids podcast, mental health, teen mental health, attachment styles, emotional intelligence

Perhaps you’ve struggled with anxiety, depression, or stress… and your teen is now old enough to notice. But how much should you share? Parents want to be honest, yet may not want to needlessly burden their kids. Getting that balance right is tricky, and deeply important. In this encore episode of “Ask Lisa: The Psychology of Raising Tweens and Teens,” psychologist Dr. Lisa Damour and journalist Reena Ninan explore how age-appropriate conversations about mental health can strengthen trust and deepen connection. They discuss if, when, and how to talk about your own challenges, how to keep the focus on your teen’s emotional needs, and ways to protect your own well-being in the process. Originally released in 2023, this episode remains essential listening for families navigating a world where conversations about mental health are now a common part of family life. 💡 YOU’LL LEARN: - When honesty helps, and when to hold back- How to talk about mental health in calm, age-appropriate ways- Why sharing your story can model resilience and help-seeking- Strategies for balancing transparency with emotional boundaries Sharing your story, when done thoughtfully, can help your teen learn how to care for their own mind and heart. Follow and subscribe to our YouTube channel where you can see all our latest video episodes: https://youtube.com/@asklisapodcast And follow us on YouTube, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, and LinkedIn @AskLisaPodcast, @Lisa.Damour, @ReenaNinan. Checkout Dr. Lisa’s website for more resources: https://www.drlisadamour.com/ Ask Lisa is produced by: https://www.goodtroubleproductions.com Episode keywords: talking mental health teens, parent anxiety, honest parenting, teen emotions Podcast keywords: ask lisa podcast, dr lisa damour, reena ninan, psychology, parenting, podcast, teens, tweens, parenting teens, parenting tweens, teen parenting, tween parenting, parenting tips, parenting advice, positive parenting, parenting podcast, teen behavior, tween challenges, raising tweens, raising teens, parenting hacks, parenting help, family dynamics, kids podcast, mental health, teen mental health, attachment styles, emotional intelligence