30. YHZ Resilience-Pt. 2 — Giving Grace

About this episode

The episode explores the intersection of trauma, shame, and recovery through personal stories and critiques of support systems related to chemsex.

In this second chapter of the YHZ Resilience flight, Halifax host Andrew guides Steven and James through a raw discussion on the complex intersection of trauma, shame, and recovery. James opens up about how a strict religious upbringing led him to repress childhood abuse, and later, how chemsex became a way to enact a self-fulfilling prophecy of being "reduced to just a sex object". Steven explains how relapsing can feel doubly shameful when paired with experiences of sexual assault that occur during use, making it easier to "sweep under the rug" rather than face judgment. The conversation shifts to the limitations of current support systems, critiquing traditional recovery models for their rigidity and lack of space to discuss sexual trauma openly. James describes finding solace in an Anonymous group initially but ultimately stepping away, finding more empowerment in personal accountability and therapy. Steven dreams of a recovery space specifically informed about chemsex. The episode concludes with a powerful reflection on self-compassion, advising listeners to replace shame with curiosity. If you’re looking for support, please explore our list of Chemsex resources/services. 🔗…

People in this episode

Host: Andrew

Guests: Steven, James

Topics covered

• trauma
• shame
• recovery
• chemsex
• support systems
• sexual trauma
• self-compassion

Keywords

• chemsex
• trauma
• recovery
• shame
• support systems
• sexual assault
• self-compassion

Mentioned in this episode

Organizations: Centre for Addiction and Mental Health (CAMH), Direction 180

Places: Halifax, Nova Scotia

More episodes of Chemstories – a podcast about PnP/chemsex (English-language edition)

• 32. YHZ Maturity-Pt. 2 — I Know What I Am · May 22, 2026 · 30 min
• 31. YHZ Maturity-Pt. 1 — Hey Harry & Hector · May 21, 2026 · 30 min
• 29. YHZ Resilience-Pt. 1 — Hey Steven & James · May 15, 2026 · 33 min
• 28. YHZ Activism — Hey Andrew · May 8, 2026 · 28 min
• 27. YHZ Prelude — Why It's Important, Halifax · May 8, 2026 · 9 min
• 26. YUL Plurality-Pt. 3 — Unapologetically · May 1, 2026 · 26 min