About this episode
Sarai Speer shares her raw experiences with treatment-resistant depression and intrusive thoughts in the final episode of the season.
Content warning: This episode discusses depression, suicidal thoughts, and intrusive thoughts. Please listen when you're in a steady place, and protect your peace if today isn't the day. Sarai is open about having intrusive thoughts but is clear that she is not suicidal and has no plan....the difference between the two is a central part of this episode. This is the rawest episode Sarai has ever recorded, and the last one before Combative Calm takes a summer break. There's no tidy framework here and no "five tools to fix it." It's just Sarai, mask all the way off, telling the truth about what it actually looks like to live with treatment-resistant depression while running a business and showing up for everyone else. She talks about doing deep TMS last fall — driving back and forth between her father's hospice care and her treatment, and losing her dad in the middle of it — and how, months later, the depression has quietly crept back in. She gets honest about the parts most people never say out loud: the weeks where executive function disappears and answering a single text feels impossible, the freeze and the twelve-hour sleeps, and the intrusive thoughts that hit twenty to fifty…
People in this episode
Host: Sarai Speer
Topics covered
- mental health
- depression
- intrusive thoughts
- treatment-resistant depression
- personal experience
- self-improvement
Keywords
- depression
- intrusive thoughts
- mental health
- TMS
- self-improvement
- personal experience
- treatment
Mentioned in this episode
Organizations: Combative Calm
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