Dr. M’s SPA Newsletter Volume 16 Issue 14 – The Adult Chair
From Dr. M's Women and Children First Podcast by Dr. Chris Magryta, "Dr. M"
June 7, 2026 · 10 min
About this episode
This episode discusses the concept of the 'three chairs' framework by Michelle Chalfant, which explores emotional maturity and the impact of childhood experiences on adult behavior.
The Adult Chair, the Adolescent Chair and the Child's Chair The Adult Chair by Michelle Chalfant is a practical framework for emotional maturity, self-awareness, and healing old patterns that unconsciously drive adult behavior. The central premise is that most people move through life reacting not from their grounded adult self, but from unresolved emotional states formed during childhood and adolescence. She organizes this idea into what she calls the “three chairs”: the Child Chair, the Adolescent Chair, and the Adult Chair. The Child Chair represents the emotional self formed in early childhood. This is the place of vulnerability, fear, shame, abandonment, loneliness, and unmet needs. When people react from this chair, they often feel helpless, emotionally flooded, overly dependent on validation, or afraid of rejection. Many adult relationship conflicts, according to Chalfant, are actually wounded children (in adult bodies) interacting with each other while wearing grown-up clothing and carrying iPhones. Same child like nervous system. Better accessories. Think of the statement: lipstick on a pig, you cannot dress up dysfunction and make it disappear. The Adolescent Chair…
People in this episode
Host: Dr. Chris Magryta
Topics covered
- emotional maturity
- self-awareness
- childhood trauma
- adult behavior
- relationship conflicts
Keywords
- Adult Chair
- Child Chair
- Adolescent Chair
- emotional self
- defensive coping strategies
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