Just One Thing for Parents with Dr Bettina Hohnen

Parenting is demanding for everyone, but for parents with ADHD, it can feel especially overwhelming. In this episode, I'm joined by Michaela Thomas, clinical psychologist and neurodiversity specialist, to explore what parenting looks like when your own executive functions are under constant strain. Parenting is, in itself, a huge executive function task, requiring constant planning, organising, remembering, emotional regulation, and managing transitions, often under pressure. For parents with ADHD, this can create a persistent sense of falling short, even when they are trying incredibly hard. We explore why shame and self-criticism are so common, particularly for those diagnosed later in life, and the "double whammy" many families experience when parents with ADHD are raising children with similar neurodivergent traits. If you're a parent with ADHD and you often find yourself asking, "Why can't I just manage this?", this episode is for you. It's a reminder that difficulty is not failure, and that being a good parent does not mean getting it right all the time. Michaela offers further support through her Reset course, which is designed to help parents gently reset their nervous systems and reduce overwhelm. You can find out more here: https://thethomasconnection.co.uk/reset/

What can you do when your child feels so distressed that school becomes impossible? How do you support them without getting pulled into the panic yourself? In this episode, I'm joined by clinical psychologist Dr Carolyne Keenan for a compassionate and deeply informative conversation about Emotionally Based School Avoidance (EBSA) — a challenge that has become increasingly common, particularly since the pandemic, and it can leave parents feeling worried, confused and often quite alone. EBSA isn't about a child who "won't go" to school; it's about a child who can't. Their level of distress is so high that getting through the school gate feels insurmountable. Carolyne explains why this happens, what early signs parents can look out for, and why EBSA is rarely about refusal, but about emotional safety. We also discuss how to collaborate with schools, how to spot patterns in your child's week, and how small, flexible adjustments can make the school environment feel more manageable. Above all, Carolyne reminds us that your relationship with your child is the anchor. Whatever challenges arise, the battle should never be between you and your child. If you'd like to explore more of Carolyne's work, she offers parent Power Hours, a new EBSA course launching in early 2026, and a free downloadable survival guide. https://www.carolynekeenan.co.uk/

Have you ever wondered why some children seem to shrink inside themselves after a mistake, while others recover quickly and move on? In this episode, I'm joined by Dr Stephen Blumenthal, clinical psychologist, psychoanalyst and author, to explore an emotion that touches every family but is so often misunderstood: shame. Drawing on his decades of clinical experience, Stephen explains how shame is both a normal and necessary part of human development, helping children understand social boundaries and navigate relationships. But when shame is constant or overwhelming, it can shape how a child thinks and feels about themselves in ways that are not helpful. We discuss what shame actually is and how it differs from guilt. Stephen offers examples of how everyday parenting moments can either support healthy development or unintentionally tip a child into feeling defective, exposed or alone. We also explore the role of emotional connection in protecting children from pathological shame, why ruptures can be repaired, and how parents' own histories influence the way we respond to our children. Stephen shares thoughtful guidance on how parents can stay emotionally present, set boundaries in a loving way, and help young children and teenagers build resilience without slipping into criticism or humiliation. If you're a parent – or supporting any young person growing up in an increasingly judgemental world – this episode offers clarity, reassurance and practical insight. More from Dr Blumenthal: https://stephenblumenthal.com

What does it really take to build a relationship with your child that can withstand the ups and downs of growing up — and how can you do that when family life feels busy, chaotic or overwhelming? In this episode, I'm joined by developmental psychologist Dona Matthews, whose work focuses on helping parents create strong, secure relationships that carry children through whatever storms life brings. Drawing on decades of research, clinical experience and her own family life, Dona offers a compassionate reminder that resilience starts with connection — not perfection. Together, we explore what it means to truly stay connected to your child: showing up emotionally, being present in the moment, and finding small ways to communicate "I'm here, I'm with you, I'm on your side." Dona explains why prioritising your own wellbeing is not selfish but foundational, because a regulated parent is better able to attune, respond and guide. She also talks about the simple but powerful role of breath, mindfulness and self-awareness in navigating tense or tricky moments. You'll come away with a clearer understanding of how small, mindful moments help build a relationship that can truly weather any storm — and why being "crazy about your child," as Dona puts it, is one of the most protective things you can offer.

Welcome to this special Must-Have Moments episode for ADHD Awareness Month. In this compilation, Dr Bettina Hohnen revisits highlights from four expert conversations exploring ADHD and executive function through different stages of development — from early childhood right through to young adulthood. We begin with Dr Laurie Faith, who explains what executive functions are, how they develop, and why joy and connection are essential for helping children's brains grow. Then Dr Peg Dawson shares her "perfect intervention" — a simple, sustainable way to strengthen executive skills in teenagers. Next, Linda Phillips guides us through how to support neurodivergent students as they transition to university — when independence increases but challenges may still remain. And finally, Dr Jo Steer offers practical strategies for parents waiting for an ADHD assessment, focusing on meeting a child's needs right now rather than waiting for a diagnosis. Together, these must-hear moments offer a developmental roadmap and a wealth of practical insights to help parents understand, support, and empower their children with ADHD and executive function differences. Whether your child is just starting school, preparing for exams, or beginning university life, this episode will help you see the strengths behind the struggles — and remind you that small, consistent steps make a real difference.

We often use praise as a way to boost our children's confidence — but does it always have the effect we hope for? In this episode of Just One Thing for Parents, Dr Bettina Hohnen speaks with Dr Barry Hymer, teacher, academic and author, about why feedback may be a far more powerful parenting tool than praise. Drawing on decades of research, Barry shares how praise, though well-intentioned, can sometimes chip away at a child's motivation and resilience. He explains the famous Stanford study showing how rewards can dampen children's intrinsic drive, and explores what happens when our words of encouragement shift from genuine feedback to subtle forms of judgement. We talk about what it really means to nurture a growth mindset, how parents can model resilience when things go wrong, and the small changes that make a big difference — like noticing effort, curiosity and persistence instead of simply saying "well done." Barry also reflects on his own experiences as a father, and how learning to replace praise with thoughtful feedback helped his children grow in confidence and self-belief.