Living with Heart: From Birth to Death

Click here to read the episode highlights. The "Living with Heart" Podcast is brought to you by Chip Dodd Resources (www.chipdodd.com) and The Voice of the Heart Center (vothcenter.com). You can connect with Dr. Chip Dodd at chip@chipdodd.com. Contact Bryan Barley for coaching at bryan@vothcenter.com. Be sure to subscribe to Dr Chip Dodd’s new Substack. He will be sharing two to three articles a week. The topics focus on healthy relationship, personal growth, and leadership. Dr. Dodd shares content two to three times a week. To subscribe, use the link above or go to chipdodd.com. Surrender: What surrender does not mean. It does not mean defeat, as in you have been beaten. It does not mean that you are through defeat establishing a peace treaty, as in you remain sovereign over your country, which is yourself. It does not mean that you are giving up benefits and have to tolerate abuse. What surrender does mean It literally means, “to render over, or give way, for one’s own benefit” It is a relinquishing of my attempt to control what I cannot control; from that standpoint, the “defeat” is the relinquishing of pride, denial of need for help, or actions that make my life unmanageable Recovery from any kind of addiction has surrender as a key beneficial step: A person first admits that they cannot control “life,” but they wish to live life Surrender occurs when we seek a path, person, or process that can do this for us surrender: “I cannot; therefore, I surrender to what God and others can do for me what I cannot do for myself” God and surrender Actions of surrender imply that a person is “rendering over” “giving back” or “returning” something that was taken from someone them or someone else. In emotional and spiritual surrender, we, as humans, are “giving back” to God what we “took” from Him. We “stole” our hearts from God; we took our feelings, needs, desire, longings and hope and refused the dependency upon God that these inherent characteristics require. We are created dependent, but will we remain vulnerable to using that dependency well or refuse to depend? Surrender really is “re-depending” on God as the Source of primary connection, presence, and fulfillment. We were born dependent and created to develop resilience in life and living through dependence. God gave us: Fear - so that we would ask for help Hurt - so that we would seek healing Sadness - to resolve loss through grief When we surrender, we are returning to how God made us, with the ability to be: connected to Him present with Him fulfilled by Him This allows us to experience all the relational wonder that life has to offer. But we must be “good at dependency.” We must start with knowing our feelings and using them as they can be used for our benefit. Click here to continue reading the episode highlights.

Click here to read the episode highlights. The "Living with Heart" Podcast is brought to you by Chip Dodd Resources (www.chipdodd.com) and The Voice of the Heart Center (vothcenter.com). You can connect with Dr. Chip Dodd at chip@chipdodd.com. Contact Bryan Barley for coaching at bryan@vothcenter.com. Be sure to subscribe to Dr Chip Dodd’s new Substack. He will be sharing two to three articles a week. The topics focus on healthy relationship, personal growth, and leadership. Dr. Dodd shares content two to three times a week. To subscribe, use the link above or go to chipdodd.com. Anger is discussed in depth in The Voice of the Heart by Chip Dodd The following are ideas that relate to the chapter on Anger. Rage versus anger When discussing anger, we have to start with what it isn’t because we have been misled to confuse anger and rage: Rage is what a person does to avoid vulnerability. It is always rooted in fear of helplessness. Anger is what a person has when they are willing to be vulnerable. Anger really is the feeling that expresses our willingness to be hurt because something or someone matters to us. Synonyms that relate to the experience of anger are yearning, longing, hoping, wanting, hungering, thirsting, and desiring. All of these words are vulnerable experiences that require courage to reveal. The gift that comes from anger is passion that leads to a willingness to be in pain/care for something or someone that matters more than pain or discomfort. To “find” or discover your anger, it helps to ask yourself these questions: What do I hunger for? What do I desire that I am willing to be in pain about? What do I see that needs to be improved, changed, or grown and will require me to risk and “sweat”? What matters to me enough that I am willing to speak up about or show up in to help make a positive difference? What do I imagine could be that I am willing to invest in? Anger and hope When a person “finds” their anger, they are also facing their hope for something to be fulfilled that has not yet happened. Anger helps us deal with the fears of failure because the risk is worth the pain. Anger is invaluable if we are going to risk taking action related to hope. Click here to continue reading the episode highlights.

Click here to read the episode highlights. The "Living with Heart" Podcast is brought to you by Chip Dodd Resources (www.chipdodd.com) and The Voice of the Heart Center (vothcenter.com). You can connect with Dr. Chip Dodd at chip@chipdodd.com. Contact Bryan Barley for coaching at bryan@vothcenter.com. You can also RSVP to Bryan for "Awaken the Heart" on Sunday, March 1 - more details here. Be sure to subscribe to Dr Chip Dodd’s new Substack. He will be sharing two to three articles a week. The topics focus on healthy relationship, personal growth, and leadership. What is Substack? It is a subscription-based platform that allows independent writers and other creators to publish content directly to their subscribers’ inboxes. The cost of the subscription is only $7 a month. Dr. Dodd shares content two to three times a week. The content focuses on healthy relationship, personal growth, and leadership. To subscribe, use the link above or go to chipdodd.com. FREE RESOURCE: The Addiction Cycle Addiction is a disease, but its genesis is related to the trauma, and subsequent toxic shame that occurs relationally. It is actually a neuro-physiological sickness that originates relationally and emotionally. When we, as children, reject our vulnerable need for emotional connection with our important caregivers and other emotional influencers, we end up suppressing our true self and this creates toxic shame. A person with addiction is driven by his/her anxiety of anticipating negative outcomes, and they seek to relieve themselves from this anxiety of anticipating negative outcomes. The need for relief from anxiety and the energy required to suppress genuine feelings and needs sets a person up to seek relief from anxiety. The relief comes in the form of counterfeit fulfillment of genuine relational connection. Counterfeit fulfillment “feels” like relationship with self, others, and even God temporarily, but it is not genuine relational connection because the person is avoiding their core feelings and needs. A person who is addicted continues to struggle in a cycle of escaping his/her feelings. This cycle is usually associated with what people call “stress.” This cycle works as follows: An event occurs that a person has feelings about and the feelings need to be addressed. The person has increased anxiety, promoting a “need” for escape. Preoccupation with control over unwanted feelings and negative anxiety begins to be the focus of the “threatened” person. Click here to continue reading the episode highlights.

Click here to read the episode highlights. The "Living with Heart" Podcast is brought to you by Chip Dodd Resources (www.chipdodd.com) and The Voice of the Heart Center (vothcenter.com). You can connect with Dr. Chip Dodd at chip@chipdodd.com. Contact Bryan Barley for coaching at bryan@vothcenter.com. You can also RSVP to Bryan for "Awaken the Heart" on Sunday, March 1 - more details here. Be sure to subscribe to Dr Chip Dodd’s new Substack. He will be sharing two to three articles a week. The topics focus on healthy relationship, personal growth, and leadership. What is Substack? It is a subscription-based platform that allows independent writers and other creators to publish content directly to their subscribers’ inboxes. The cost of the subscription is only $7 a month. Dr. Dodd shares content two to three times a week. The content focuses on healthy relationship, personal growth, and leadership. To subscribe, use the link above or go to chipdodd.com. We are created to live fully, and we do so through relationship with ourselves, others, and God, as we bring the true heart of feelings, needs, desire, longings and hope to relationships. Relationship requires vulnerability. If the ability to be “comfortable” with dependence is fractured in one’s earlier years of life, the result is a set up for that person to feel the need to “hide” his/her heart. Instead of remaining present and connected, he/she has a compulsion to perform in order to belong or matter. Trauma is experienced when one’s ability to accept their need for dependence is fractured. The need to suppress emotional pain in order to survive, belong, and matter is the foundation upon which addiction is built. Addiction is a false fulfillment of how we are created to live. Addiction is relationship with a substance or process that gives a sense of connection without having to be vulnerable; in other words, a person can distract or numb themselves from having to feel by using some form of avoidance of relationship with one’s self, others, and God. Click here to continue reading the episode highlights.

Click here to read the episode highlights. The "Living with Heart" Podcast is brought to you by Chip Dodd Resources (www.chipdodd.com) and The Voice of the Heart Center (vothcenter.com). You can connect with Dr. Chip Dodd at chip@chipdodd.com. Contact Bryan Barley for coaching at bryan@vothcenter.com. Be sure to subscribe to Dr Chip Dodd’s new Substack. He will be sharing two to three articles a week. The topics focus on healthy relationship, personal growth, and leadership. What is Substack? It is a subscription-based platform that allows independent writers and other creators to publish content directly to their subscribers’ inboxes. The cost of the subscription is only $7 a month. Dr. Dodd shares content two to three times a week. The content focuses on healthy relationship, personal growth, and leadership. To subscribe, use the link above or go to chipdodd.com. In this new season, “What is Addiction” we will focus on three main aspects of addiction: what addiction is how addiction operates what recovery entails The pervasive impact of addiction The pervasiveness of addiction and its impact makes it a pandemic, perhaps the deadliest human beings have ever experienced. A pandemic is an outbreak of a disease that occurs over a wide geographic area (continents in the case of addiction.) It affects a significant proportion of the population. An epidemic is localized. A pandemic refers to “all demographics.” Tragically, Addiction impairs the addict’s ability to see the impact of their addiction. This impairment is called denial. It prevents the addict from seeing clearly and accurately the consequences of his/her addiction. We have 30+ million alcoholics in this country and 15+ million people addicted to illegal drugs. For every one person chemically dependent on alcohol or illegal drugs, 3 to 4 other people are emotionally, mentally, if not physically harmed. These addictions result in emotional trauma, setting up the high probability of tendency toward addiction. Adding up the numbers using only the impact of addiction upon 3 people is 135 million people in this nation harmed. When the addicted person is added to the number, the impact is monstrous. Click here to continue reading the episode highlights.