Meeting the Inconceivable | Zen Koans, Dreams & the Creative Life

In this lively summer sesshin talk, Roshi John Tarrant engages students in reflecting on what actually happens as practice deepens during a long retreat. Like front foot and back foot walking, we get a taste of the light and then are lost again in the darkness. We reach for a new koan or practice that will open the "right" door. Seeing our true nature encompasses both the light and the dark. Let the koan carry you. "There is not a matter or right or wrong. There is a matter of being here and respecting the quality of being here." — John Tarrant. What You'll Learn: How does meditation change the mind What is front foot walking How to harness the natural movement of the mind Why we should lean into difficulties How perception is linked to thought — Links Mentioned: Learn more about this episode Learn more about koans Learn more about Zen John Tarrant's books: Bring Me the Rhinoceros The Story of the Buddha

Today, Roshi John Tarrant takes up an infamous koan about a woman raising a goose in a bottle. There are many bottles that we may feel trapped in throughout our lives. Awakening is never about solving our problems but rather about dissolving the constraints of the mind. In this episode, we discuss the don't-know quality of Zen and koans in general. We also consider koans as a gateway. "Reject what is not true, and the real naturally appears." — John Tarrant. What You'll Learn: What does the koan about the goose in the bottle teach us How to care for life What is awakening How to get the goods out of the bottle — Links Mentioned: Learn more about this episode Learn more about koans Learn more about Zen John Tarrant's books: Bring Me the Rhinoceros The Story of the Buddha

In this episode, Roshi Tess Beasley begins with an old Seamus Heaney poem about how the universe appears in all its splendor in the places we least expect. What does it mean to stay intimate with the being of the world, and let it unfold against our fingertips? What does it mean to give way to poverty in Zen, meaning to be empty of ideas and preconceived notions? Listen to this episode to learn how to feel your way along the wall, no matter how dark. "It doesn't matter how it comes to you, that you begin to dissolve your usual borders and feel a part of things." - Tess Beasley. What You'll Learn: What does koan Zen say about intimacy What does it mean to stay intimate with the being of the world How can we make sense of the feeling that our borders are not as certain as we thought they were What does it mean to give way to poverty in Zen How to let the world in How to feel your way along the wall — Links Mentioned: Learn more about this episode Learn more about koans Learn more about Zen John Tarrant's books: Bring Me the Rhinoceros The Story of the Buddha

As the year comes to a close, "the Guanyins" -- Roshis Allison Atwill, Tess Beasley, Michelle Riddle, and Sarah Bender -- team up to tell a wintery Christmas tale of wonder. Holidays often come with difficulties, but also have the potential of opening the heart into unexpected moments of healing. Listen to a story of reconciliation, surprise, and the blessing that emptiness can bring to any season. Happy New Year! "Zen sees awakening as a kind of miracle." - Tess Beasley. Learn more about this episode of Meeting the Inconceivable at https://www.pacificzen.org/30

Thanksgiving and the whole notion of gratitude can bring along complicated feelings. In this episode, Roshi John Tarrant shares an old story about a miserable student convinced that he is beyond help. The teacher he finds tells him she'll offer him a practice but only if he promises to take it up for a whole year, no questions asked. It goes terribly, but even that turns out perfectly in the end. Gratitude is far more mysterious than we give it credit for, and impossible to fabricate. Like awakening itself, it arises by itself as we move deeper on the path. "We don't oppose anything that rises in the heart or mind." - John Tarrant. Learn more about this episode of Meeting the Inconceivable at https://www.pacificzen.org/28

Being lost has a transformative beauty to it. Being lost is a gateway to the extraordinary, as it brings about the possibility of not knowing who we are. Listen to this episode as Roshi John Tarrant discusses the importance of being tossed out of our certainties and discovering something far more strange and true. The final evening of sesshin in the bath. "We can't object to the path or ourselves." - John Tarrant. Learn more about this episode of Meeting the Inconceivable at https://www.pacificzen.org/26

What does it mean to be in the bath of awakening? We somehow always have a reluctance to immerse ourselves completely, which is the very thing that holds it at bay. In this episode, Roshi Jess Cardin talks listeners through another water koan from The Blue Cliff Record in which the teacher recounts the "subtle touch reveals the light in everything." What do you hold in reserve? What keeps you feeling outside of things or difficult to reach? Listen from deep in sesshin. "Once I am in the bath, I can look back and see that I was always in the bath." - Jesse Cardin. Learn more about this episode of Meeting the Inconceivable at https://www.pacificzen.org/24

We are all walking through the valley holding our lanterns. What is the Way? What do the valley and the lantern represent? Koans allow us to stop chasing. When we are not chasing things, we can experience freedom and delight. When you relate to something outside of yourself, you can be free. Listen to this episode as Roshi John Tarrant muses on having the mind of a dead log. "The whole of your life has a nobility and truth to it." - John Tarrant. Learn more about this episode of Meeting the Inconceivable at https://www.pacificzen.org/22

Today, Roshi Allison Atwill shares a poem about our intrinsic ability to always carry light and silence. In this episode, she explains how the original silence is always with us and within us. What are the elemental termas of Tibetan Buddhism? How can we apply these termas to meditation practice? We can learn and teach from the silence and the light that we each have within. "Awakening always appears in our actual life." - Allison Atwill. Learn more about this episode of Meeting the Inconceivable at https://www.pacificzen.org/20

In this episode, Roshi John Tarrant tells the story of Deshan and his transformative pilgrimage of awakening. We are all Deshan, ready to let go of our old pile of stories. What is it like to be on a journey? How do we get home from a journey? How does the journey change us? How can we meet our journey with openness? "Meditation is a kind of change of heart, but it is more a forgetting to carry our burdens." - John Tarrant. Learn more about this episode of Meeting the Inconceivable at https://www.pacificzen.org/18

Today, Roshi Allison Atwill explores the bodhisattva's unique relationship with uncertainty as a healing balm for suffering. Describing how Zen Buddhism draws from the Mahayana tradition in which the bodhisattva path means helping to awaken all beings, Atwill notes this is not a future goal to somehow be achieved but a moment-to-moment way of meeting every aspect of our own lives with sincere openness. Your awakening has no recipe, she says. It's uniquely yours to discover as everything you've taken as a given falls away. "You can't get paint-by-numbers for a painting that doesn't exist. And it is the same for your awakening." - Tess Beasley. Learn more about this episode of Meeting the Inconceivable at https://www.pacificzen.org/16

In this episode, Roshi John Tarrant takes up a series of bright gate koans from The Blue Cliff Record, all featuring one of the greatest Zen masters of all-time, Yunmen. At the root of these dharmakaya koans lies the question of consciousness, or what Yunmen describes as: what is that light that everyone has? Chock-full of awakening stories from ancient China to modern day, this talk showcases Zen Buddhism's earthy, humorous, and joyful exploration of the wonders of existence. Listen in to learn more about finding your own light. "Look around. This is your temple of the Blue Cliff." – John Tarrant. Learn more about this episode of Meeting the Inconceivable at https://www.pacificzen.org/14

In this episode, Roshi Allison Atwill offers insight into Zen's signature transmission beyond words and letters. Telling the story of infamous Japanese Zen Master, Ikkyu Sojun, and his ambivalence toward transmission, Atwill describes how our particular awakening is always tailor-made to the circumstances of our lives. It always comes through the door we least expect, and dissolves whatever sense of separation we've held in place throughout our lives. Listen to learn more about the nature of awakening and how we are always receiving transmission. "We are always receiving transmission." - Allison Atwill. Learn more about this episode of Meeting the Inconceivable at https://www.pacificzen.org/12