Miracle Moon - The Podcast

In this episode, I’m joined by Dr. Julianne Boutaleb, a perinatal psychologist specialising in fertility, reproductive trauma, and perinatal mental health. We explore the often-overlooked emotional impact of fertility struggles, IVF, pregnancy loss, and how these experiences can intersect with neonatal care (NICU).We talk about reproductive trauma, disenfranchised grief, and the concept of the “reproductive story” and why so many parents feel stuck in survival mode long after their baby is here. This conversation explores identity, shame, and the layered impact of fertility and NICU experiences on mental health and parenthood.In this episode, we talk about:What reproductive trauma is and how fertility, IVF and NICU experiences build over timePregnancy loss, miscarriage and disenfranchised griefThe “reproductive story” and disrupted expectations of parenthoodWhy many parents feel stuck in survival mode after NICUIdentity, shame and the long-term mental health impact of fertility journeysResources & links mentioned in this episode:⁠⁠The NICU Space Community⁠⁠An online support space for NICU parents at all stages of their journey. Inside you’ll find specialist resources, coping tools and connection with parents who understand what this experience can feel like.Make Birth Better Article- Is My Baby Affected by Birth Trauma and What Can I Do to Help? https://www.makebirthbetter.org/blog/is-my-baby-affected-by-birth-traumaRescripted Article: Parenting After Infertility: Do We Ever Truly Move on from Fertility Trauma?https://rescripted.com/posts/parenting-after-infertility-do-we-ever-truly-move-on-from-fertility-trauma Stay connectedInstagram: ⁠⁠@miraclemoonuk⁠⁠Website: ⁠⁠⁠miraclemoon.co.uk⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠The NICU Space community: ⁠The NICU SpaceConnect with our guest, Dr. Julianne BoutalebInstagram: @parenthoodinmind One last thing! Help us spread the word by leaving a review and subscribing...that way, you won't miss a single episode. ⭐️

In this episode, I’m joined by Lottie from Leo’s Neonatal and NICU Neuroscience to explore what happens in the brain and body during and after neonatal care.We talk about the NICU nervous system response, what survival mode actually means, and why hyper vigilance, snapping, overthinking, and the inability to switch off make so much sense after trauma. We also explore matrescence, the neuroscience of becoming a parent, and how neonatal care can shape identity, stress responses, and long-term wellbeing.Lottie and I discuss why so many NICU parents feel stuck in survival mode long after discharge, how trauma can show up physically in the body, and the powerful role of validation, community, and nervous system support in healing.In this episode, we talk about:⁠The NICU Space Community⁠An online support space for NICU parents at all stages of their journey. Inside you’ll find specialist resources, coping tools and connection with parents who understand what this experience can feel like.The NICU Parent Handbook A new resource I’ve created to help parents make sense of the thoughts and feelings that often follow neonatal care. It explores common experiences like guilt, grief, hypervigilance and anxiety, alongside practical tools to help parents cope. Coming soon.Stay connectedInstagram: ⁠@miraclemoonuk⁠Website: ⁠⁠miraclemoon.co.uk⁠⁠⁠The NICU Space community: ⁠The NICU Space⁠⁠@nicu_neuroscienceOne last thing! Help us spread the word by leaving a review and subscribing...that way, you won't miss a single episode. ⭐️

In this episode, Lorna Tallowin, NICU parent and founder of Super Dinky, turns the questions back to me, inviting me to share my own NICU journey.We talk about my pregnancy, delivering unexpectedly at 31 weeks, and what the early weeks in neonatal intensive care were like. We also explore survival mode, dissociation, ongoing anxiety, and the identity shift that comes with being a NICU parent.Lorna and I discuss why community, validation, and psychological support are so important for parents after NICU, and the gaps that still exist in care.In this episode, we talk about:My premature birth at 31 weeks and early NICU experiencesSurvival mode, dissociation, and emotional overwhelmOngoing anxiety, hypervigilance, and health-related worry after NICUGuilt, grief, and the pressure to “make it up” to your childThe importance of community and validation for NICU parentsHow Miracle Moon began and grew from lived experienceResources & links mentioned in this episode:The NICU Space CommunityAn online support space for NICU parents at all stages of their journey. Inside you’ll find specialist resources, coping tools and connection with parents who understand what this experience can feel like.The NICU Parent HandbookA new resource I’ve created to help parents make sense of the thoughts and feelings that often follow neonatal care. It explores common experiences like guilt, grief, hypervigilance and anxiety, alongside practical tools to help parents cope. Coming soon. Super DinkyFounded by Lorna, NICU Mum and Beth NICU nurse, @superdinky creates meaningful products for NICU families while raising awareness of the experience and helping parents feel part of a wider community. SuperDinky - Premature Baby Clothes and NICU support based in the UKStay ConnectedInstagram: @miraclemoonukWebsite: miraclemoon.co.ukThe NICU Space community: The NICU SpaceOne last thing! Help us spread the word by leaving a review and subscribing...that way, you won't miss a single episode. ⭐️

Kate’s son Frank battled group B strep meningitis at just 3 days old, which led to him being diagnosed with cerebral palsy and epilepsy. Kate shares with us her hospital experience, her fears that his conditions would limit his life, and how she accepted and came to terms with the life her family now lives.Frank is a happy, giggly child and Kate is a wonderful influence for parents going through similar experiences to hers, you can follow her now “@overatkates”.In this episode, we’re chatting about:- The events that followed after Kate’s son, Frank, contracted group B strep at 3 days old- What group B strep is and the aftermath of the infection- Coming to terms with her son’s diagnoses of cerebral palsy and epilepsy- Staying positive and how to move towards acceptance 💌 Check out the full show notes for this episode here, where you can find timestamps, a transcript and any links or resources we think are relevant to this episode. If this episode resonates with you or if you have questions, reach out to us on Instagram or shoot us an email at hello@miraclemoon.co.uk.🎧 We love engaging with our listeners! Share a screenshot of this episode and don't forget to tag us on Instagram ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@miraclemoonuk⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ when you're tuning in.⭐️ Help us spread the word by leaving a review and subscribing...that way, you won't miss a single episode.

When she went into labour at 20 weeks pregnant, Audrey Williams Joseph was told that her baby would not survive. 30 years later, he’s living his life and was Audrey’s inspiration for creating the support that she never had in the 90s – six residential care homes for children and adults that have additional needs. Audrey is a true inspiration, and this episode will help you to redefine what you think of as winning, and celebrate the small moments that make up each day.In this episode, we’re chatting about:- Audrey’s son, who was born at 20 weeks and wasn’t expected to survive- The impact of being in limbo in NICU- Having faith to stay strong and overcome doctors’ predictions- How Audrey turned her experience into a mission to create care homes💌 Check out the full show notes for this episode here, where you can find timestamps, a transcript and any links or resources we think are relevant to this episode. If this episode resonates with you or if you have questions, reach out to us on Instagram or shoot us an email at hello@miraclemoon.co.uk.🎧 We love engaging with our listeners! Share a screenshot of this episode and don't forget to tag us on Instagram ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@miraclemoonuk⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ when you're tuning in.⭐️ Help us spread the word by leaving a review and subscribing...that way, you won't miss a single episode.

In this powerful episode, Aideen (@ivfmumblings) shares her honest story of infertility, IVF, NICU, and loss. After seven rounds of IVF, she became pregnant with twins, but at 30 weeks she went into premature labour, was put under general anaesthetic for an emergency section, and lost one of her babies to suspected NEC.Only four months later, she conceived naturally and found herself back in NICU at 36 weeks. Now pregnant again, Aideen opens up about how she’s advocating for herself this time, the importance of mental health support after NICU, and what she wishes she’d known then.In this episode, we’re chatting about:- Going through IVF – not just once, but seven times- Being pregnant with twins and then going into NICU- The unimaginable pain of losing a twin- Going through subsequent pregnancies (even natural ones) after baby loss- How to advocate for yourself in NICU and during pregnancy after loss💌 Check out the full show notes for this episode here, where you can find timestamps, a transcript and any links or resources we think are relevant to this episode. If this episode resonates with you or if you have questions, reach out to us on Instagram or shoot us an email at hello@miraclemoon.co.uk.🎧 We love engaging with our listeners! Share a screenshot of this episode and don't forget to tag us on Instagram ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@miraclemoonuk⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ when you're tuning in.⭐️ Help us spread the word by leaving a review and subscribing...that way, you won't miss a single episode.🙏 A huge thank you to Emma at Cover My Bubble for supporting our podcast - you can find out more about all that Cover My Bubble offer at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.covermybubble.co.uk

If you’re struggling to handle the divide between NICU and your other children at home – know that you are definitely not alone.Today’s guest Enya had her toddler Saoirse at home while she was in NICU with her 28 weeker, Roisin, and she shares in today’s episode about how she handled feeling split between the two. Additionally, her health anxiety began to worsen after NICU as well, and we talk about how she manages that with all the medical follow ups that come after a stay in NICU.In this episode, we’re chatting about:- Enya’s belief that you should always listen to your gut and why that meant baby Roisin survived- The divide between a baby in NICU and a toddler at home and how Enya managed it- What having health anxiety is like and things that have helped Enya- Documenting the NICU experience, especially now that it’s “over” (though it never is!)- What support after NICU should look like though sadly doesn’t💌 Check out the full show notes for this episode here, where you can find timestamps, a transcript and any links or resources we think are relevant to this episode. If this episode resonates with you or if you have questions, reach out to us on Instagram or shoot us an email at hello@miraclemoon.co.uk.🎧 We love engaging with our listeners! Share a screenshot of this episode and don't forget to tag us on Instagram ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@miraclemoonuk⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ when you're tuning in.⭐️ Help us spread the word by leaving a review and subscribing...that way, you won't miss a single episode.🙏 A huge thank you to Emma at Cover My Bubble for supporting our podcast - you can find out more about all that Cover My Bubble offer at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.covermybubble.co.uk

Ashley and Aisha from Dear NICU Mama join us in today’s episode, and share all about the impact of NICU on mental health, finding meaning again after trauma, and the “letters of hope” that Dear NICU Mama asks NICU mums to write.Each month, the non-profit provides a different prompt for NICU mums to write to others about their experience, and share a hopeful message with them. Of course, these messages make sure to help other NICU mums feel less alone and so many people say how therapeutic they found writing these letters.In this episode, we’re chatting about:- What brought Ashley and Aisha together and their roles in Dear NICU Mama- The impact of being in NICU during the COVID lockdowns- The Dear NICU Mama letters, why writing can be therapeutic and common struggles that come up- What it looks like to go back to “real life” after staying in NICU or the loss of a child and how you can find meaning againWhether it’s from recounting your time in NICU, or from providing empathy to another person, the letter prompts from Dear NICU Mama can be a really helpful way to begin to process the trauma that you went through.💌 Check out the full show notes for this episode here, where you can find timestamps, a transcript and any links or resources we think are relevant to this episode. If this episode resonates with you or if you have questions, reach out to us on Instagram or shoot us an email at hello@miraclemoon.co.uk.🎧 We love engaging with our listeners! Share a screenshot of this episode and don't forget to tag us on Instagram ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@miraclemoonuk⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ when you're tuning in.⭐️ Help us spread the word by leaving a review and subscribing...that way, you won't miss a single episode.🙏 A huge thank you to Emma at Cover My Bubble for supporting our podcast - you can find out more about all that Cover My Bubble offer at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.covermybubble.co.uk

Rachael and her husband, Andy, were thrown into the world of neonatal care 17 years ago when Rachael unexpectedly went into labour and their son, Charlie, was born at 28 weeks. This experience impacted the whole family immensely, and their determination to give back led to them starting Ickle Pickles children’s charity – a charity that raises funds for life-saving equipment that neonatal units desperately need.In this episode, we’re chatting about:- The fear that surrounds premature birth- How her NICU experience led to her and her husband, Andy, starting a charity to give back- The work that The Ickle Pickles do- Why giving back can help with healing from your experience- How finding meaning can help with post traumatic growth - Her son Charlie’s life today and how he has been impacted by NICUIf you’ve been thinking that you’d like to give back after your NICU stay, in whatever form that looks like, today’s episode will certainly inspire you to do just that.💌 Check out the full show notes for this episode here, where you can find timestamps, a transcript and any links or resources we think are relevant to this episode. If this episode resonates with you or if you have questions, reach out to us on Instagram or shoot us an email at hello@miraclemoon.co.uk.🎧 We love engaging with our listeners! Share a screenshot of this episode and don't forget to tag us on Instagram ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@miraclemoonuk⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ when you're tuning in.⭐️ Help us spread the word by leaving a review and subscribing...that way, you won't miss a single episode.🙏 A huge thank you to Emma at Cover My Bubble for supporting our podcast - you can find out more about all that Cover My Bubble offer at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.covermybubble.co.uk

Therapy around the NICU experience is obviously something that can be really powerful to help you process and manage the trauma… but what if there was something you could do in tiny moments, by yourself while in the hospital, at home, out on a walk or even at your desk?Today’s guest, Victoria Craig, is a PhD student helping to research techniques that can help NICU parents process their trauma – namely the Butterfly Hug and Tetris.In this episode, we’re chatting about:- Why the trauma often hits NICU parents months or even years down the line- Bilateral stimulation and how it can help trauma- All the information you need to start using both the Butterfly Hug and Tetris techniques- Why feeling validated and surrounded by a community can help you after your neonatal stay💌 Check out the full show notes for this episode here, where you can find timestamps, a transcript and any links or resources we think are relevant to this episode. If this episode resonates with you or if you have questions, reach out to us on Instagram or shoot us an email at hello@miraclemoon.co.uk.🎧 We love engaging with our listeners! Share a screenshot of this episode and don't forget to tag us on Instagram ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@miraclemoonuk⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ when you're tuning in.⭐️ Help us spread the word by leaving a review and subscribing...that way, you won't miss a single episode.🙏 A huge thank you to Emma at Cover My Bubble for supporting our podcast - you can find out more about all that Cover My Bubble offer at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.covermybubble.co.uk

Leila Green experienced mum guilt hard – after her triplets were born at 33 weeks, and split between NICU and home, she constantly felt like she was letting at least one of them down at any given moment.She soon realised mum guilt doesn’t help anyone – and it certainly isn’t the indicator that you care about your children. Now a writer, speaker and the founder of F*** Mum Guilt, Leila shares her story with us, how she broke out of the self-doubt spiral and the four steps you can follow to move on from mum guilt, too.In this episode, we’re chatting about:- Her story of having triplets naturally following two miscarriages- When the mum guilt started and why it caused a self-doubt spiral- How she handled being split between having two babies at home and one in NICU- The “F*** Mum Guilt” movement and why Leila now offers the support she didn’t receive- Four powerful steps to letting go of mum guiltJoin us for a conversation every NICU parent needs to hear!💌 Check out the full show notes for this episode here, where you can find timestamps, a transcript and any links or resources we think are relevant to this episode. If this episode resonates with you or if you have questions, reach out to us on Instagram or shoot us an email at hello@miraclemoon.co.uk.🎧 We love engaging with our listeners! Share a screenshot of this episode and don't forget to tag us on Instagram ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@miraclemoonuk⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ when you're tuning in.⭐️ Help us spread the word by leaving a review and subscribing...that way, you won't miss a single episode.🙏 A huge thank you to Emma at Cover My Bubble for supporting our podcast - you can find out more about all that Cover My Bubble offer at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.covermybubble.co.uk

“Is it just me?”If you’ve ever asked yourself that after NICU – you’re not alone. Struggling with your mental health after time in neonatal care is sadly incredibly common for so many of us. There’s lots of different ways you can find your mental health suffering, and in today’s episode, Dr. Frankie is diving into many different conditions, where you can find the support you need and also her own story of anxiety after neonatal care.In this episode, Frankie shares:- Feeling frozen and disconnected after her baby’s early arrival- The sneaky ways postnatal anxiety showed up- Why emotions after NICU can feel so messy – and why that’s normal- How to know when it’s time to reach out for support- What healing actually looks like (hint: it’s not about “getting over it”)If you’re carrying heavy feelings after NICU, this episode is for you. You’re not broken, you’re not a bad parent, and you don’t have to do this alone.💌 Check out the full show notes for this episode here, where you can find timestamps, a transcript and any links or resources we think are relevant to this episode. If this episode resonates with you or if you have questions, reach out to us on Instagram or shoot us an email at hello@miraclemoon.co.uk.🎧 We love engaging with our listeners! Share a screenshot of this episode and don't forget to tag us on Instagram ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@miraclemoonuk⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ when you're tuning in.⭐️ Help us spread the word by leaving a review and subscribing...that way, you won't miss a single episode.🙏 A huge thank you to Emma at Cover My Bubble for supporting our podcast - you can find out more about all that Cover My Bubble offer at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.covermybubble.co.uk

When Bex struggled with her infertility, she didn’t imagine she’d end up with four children – let alone going through the journey of having triplets!Now with her three little ones being 16 weeks old (though technically 5 weeks old corrected), she’s right in the thick of adjusting to life at home after NICU. We feel so lucky she agreed to join us on the podcast, as we get to hear her real unfiltered thoughts about NICU and how she’s coping now. In this episode, we’re chatting about:- Her pregnancy with triplets- Giving birth at 29 weeks, with 25 people in the room!- Handling tough emotions whilst being in NICU- What life is like now with four kids under five-years-old- Why community has played such an important role for her💌 Check out the full show notes for this episode here, where you can find timestamps, a transcript and any links or resources we think are relevant to this episode. If this episode resonates with you or if you have questions, reach out to us on Instagram or shoot us an email at hello@miraclemoon.co.uk.🎧 We love engaging with our listeners! Share a screenshot of this episode and don't forget to tag us on Instagram ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@miraclemoonuk⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ when you're tuning in.⭐️ Help us spread the word by leaving a review and subscribing...that way, you won't miss a single episode.🙏 A huge thank you to Emma at Cover My Bubble for supporting our podcast - you can find out more about all that Cover My Bubble offer at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.covermybubble.co.uk