Neurodiverse Love with Mona Kay

It has been an honor and a privilege for me to have hosted and co-hosted the Neurodiverse Love podcast since the fall of 2020. I will be forever grateful to my dear friend Olga, who agreed to start this podcast journey with me in the middle of the pandemic, and to all my co-hosts who have partnered with me along the way: Manecia, Greg, Nicole and Bronwyn.I also want to thank all the amazing guests who gave me an opportunity to ask them the questions so many of us needed the answers to. Each individual, couple, coach, therapist, educator, author, and/or researcher who shared their lived experience and expertise has helped us increase understanding of the strengths, differences and challenges that Neurodiverse couples experience. I am so grateful that thousands of people listening in more than 70 countries have received information, tools and resources to help them understand they are not alone and there is hope! Whether your relationship continues or ends understanding and acceptance of what can and can’t change can make such a big difference in the healing process.If you have not had a chance to listen to the 4 episodes of the Neurodiverse Love Docuseries on YouTube I hope we will do that today. In addition, I hope you will check out my website at www.neurodiverselove.com for more information about the resources I have available.Nine years ago, in 2017, I discovered I was in a neurodiverse marriage for 29 years and didn’t know it. Even though my marriage ended in 2018, I made it my mission to help others understand what my ex-husband and I never knew, and the work I am doing through Neurodiverse Love became my mission.This is my last episode of the Neurodiverse Love podcast and I hope the information I share will be helpful to a lot of you, including my thoughts about: ​Communication preferences ​Emotional needs​Sensory differences ​Social battery​Physical intimacy​Employment ​Processing speeds​Special interests​Transition time​Perpetual vs solvable problemsI want everyone who listens to this podcast, the docuseries or accesses any of the work I do to know that you’re not alone! There are SO many more resources available then when I first discovered I was in a neurodiverse marriage in 2017.I am also very excited to share with all of you that I will be cohosting a new podcast with my friend and colleague Jodi Carlton and it is called “Navigating Neurodiverse Love & Life” . Our first episode was published on May 26, 2026 and you can watch it on Jodi’s YouTube channel at the link below:https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLSyXJdjUav7pKfGin5gbYIPJcQ0fAkxLO&si=hCAxYXD3fkjxg7MhI also want to thank all of you for listening to the podcast and for reaching out to share your lived experiences and your suggestions for topics to address on the podcast. I am hopeful that the next phase of my work will continue to have a positive impact on neurodiverse couples and individual partners and that we will all continue to learn about ourselves and our partners and create lives that are filled with peace, joy, love, and purpose.❤️🙏

The four part Neurodiverse Love Docuseries shows how 4 neurodiverse couples navigate different communication styles, emotional needs, sensory and physical intimacy differences, and employment and special interests. In addition, three therapists/coaches who work with neurodiverse couples share strategies, tools and insights that can help neurodiverse couples navigate their strengths, challenges and differences. Check out the first 2 episodes here: https://www.neurodiverselove.com/the-documentary————————————————————————-During this episode relationship therapist and coach Karen Doherty shares how she has been helping neurodiverse couples better understand each other for more than two decades.During this conversation, Karen specifically addresses the challenges Neurodiverse couples have with communication, emotional regulation, couple equality/fit and intimacy and empathy issues.Karen is based in the UK and her new Netflix series called “Blue Therapy” aired on March 4, 2026.You can learn more about the services Karen offers here.

This episode is a very informative panel discussion from the 2025 Neurodiverse Love Conference. The following individuals participated in this conversation and I hope you find the information they shared helpful.- Stephanie Holmes (www.holmsasr.com)- Grace Malonai (www.Therathrive.com)- Jodi Carlton (www.Jodicarlton.com)- Dan Jones (www.Theaspieworld.com)- Laura Schreiner (www.Laurasnc.com)Trigger warning: the topic of abuse is discussed during this presentation, so if this is triggering please skip this episode.The panelists address so many important topics that neurodivergent individuals and Neurodiverse couples may be interested in exploring, including:​Demand avoidance​Rejection sensitivity dysphoria​Impostor syndrome​The impact of different religious beliefs in ND relationships​Forgiveness, even when behaviors may still be occurring or learning new ways of functioning together?​Calling out uncomfortable behaviors and/or making accommodations ​Self awareness vs masking​Using dysregulation as a weapon​The importance of reciprocity in a healthy relationship​Struggling with Theory of Mind. ​Using the yes/and approach.If you haven’t had a chance to watch the first two episodes of the Neurodiverse Love Docuseries I hope you will check them out today. Episode 1 addresses Communication and Episode 2 addresses Emotional Reciprocity.if you are interested in getting lifetime access to all the video presentations from the 2025 Neurodiverse Love Conference click here for more information.

The first two episode s of the Neurodiverse Love Docuseries are now available. Through this four part series, you will meet four Neurodiverse couples who share some of their lived experiences, lessons learned and the strengths, challenges and differences they’ve had in their marriages. None of the couples knew they were in a mixed neurotype relationship when they married and each shares some of the experiences that have led to more connection, understanding and acceptance of each other’s differences.In addition, you will hear from three coaches/therapists who work with Neurodiverse couples. They share their perspective on why challenges may be occurring and also provide strategies and tools for increasing connection.Watch the Neurodiverse Love Docuseries on YouTube.—————————————————————————During this podcast episode Dr. Jesse Mahoney shares what inspired her TEDx talk, “What Would Love Do?” and how that question changed her neurodiverse relationship and her work.Jessie and her husband Mark are one of the four ND couples featured in the Neurodiverse Love Docuseries and she shares what she hopes the Docuseries will offer.In addition she shares why neurodivergence can go unrecognized for so long — even in medical families?She also discusses what she means by solving human problems without the human element.Jessie also explains what she means by the phrase “approach determines landing” and also shares how nervous systems shape communication, conflict, and connection?You can learn more about Dr. Mahoney’s work here.

The first episode of the Neurodiverse Love Docuseries was released on February 14, 2026. Through this four part series, you will meet four Neurodiverse couples who share some of their lived experiences, lessons learned and the strengths, challenges and differences they’ve had in their marriages. None of the couples knew they were in a mixed neurotype relationship when they married and each shares some of the experiences that have led to more connection, understanding and acceptance of each other’s differences.In addition, you will hear from three coaches/therapists who work with Neurodiverse couples. They share their perspective on why challenges may be occurring and also provide strategies and tools for increasing connection.To contribute to this very important project or watch the first episode click here.—————————————————————————- During this episode with Sarah Swenson you will have an opportunity to listen to another wonderful session from the 2025 Neurodiverse Love Conference. Sarah shares her expertise working with neurodiverse couples and discusses some of the issues that many couples may be dealing with and need some guidance on. The topics addressed include:- Misinterpreting each other‘s intent- How differences in emotional intensity can contribute to arguments for neurodiverse couples- Challenges with alexithymia and interoception - How unspoken expectations and assumptions can bring about misunderstandings- How timing can impact your conversations and the importance of transition time- The impact of different processing speeds- Facial expressions may not match thinking- Bean theory as an energy gauge- How sensory sensitivity and overload can impact a conversationYou can learn more about Sarah and the services she offers through her website at: TheNeurodiverseCouple.com - About Sarah Swenson LMHC

The first episode of the Neurodiverse Love Docuseries was released on February 14, 2026. Through this four part series, you will meet four Neurodiverse couples who share some of their lived experiences, lessons learned and the strengths, challenges and differences they’ve had in their marriages. None of the couples knew they were in a mixed neurotype relationship when they married and each shares some of the experiences that have led to more connection, understanding and acceptance of each other’s differences.In addition, you will hear from three coaches/therapists who work with Neurodiverse couples. They share their perspective on why challenges may be occurring and also provide strategies and tools for increasing connection.To contribute to this very important project or to learn more about the docuseries click here.—————————————————————————- This is another fantastic presentation from the 2025 Neurodiverse Love Conference. During this episode you will learn from Rev. Dr. Stephanie Holmes and Rev. Dan Holmes who are not only ordained ministers but a happily married neurodiverse couple of 30 years! Stephanie & Dan coach couples primarily who are faith-based and will share how the role of faith can help build connection and intimacy in the neurodiverse couple or how the rules, roles and rigidity of religion can bring disconnection in the neurodiverse relationship. Stephanie and Dan Holmes write from lived experience as a NeuroDiverse Christian Couple (NDCC) as well as professional experience working with NDCCs. Their first book, written with their adult children, Embracing the Autism Spectrum: Finding Hope & Joy Navigating the NeuroDiverse Family Journey focuses on their parenting journey of neurodivergent children and discovering their own neurodiversity in marriage. Dr. Stephanie C. Holmes received her bachelor's degree in psychology from Campbell University, her Master's in counseling from Liberty University, and her doctorate in education from Abilene Christian University. She is an ordained minister, author, autism researcher, speaker, and certified autism specialist. When her daughter Sydney was diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome, her world and focus changed from a thriving marriage and family therapy practice to a world of Individualized Education Programs, 504 educational plans, and understanding how to help students and individuals with challenges and needs in the classroom and the church setting. She is the owner and founder of Autism Spectrum Resources for Marriage & Family, LLC, and she and Dan are co-founders of The International Association of NeuroDiverse Christian Marriage, LLC, and the podcast NeuroDiverse Christian Couples. Dan Holmes is a seasoned leader with a rich background in systems architecture, design, and consulting. He received his bachelor's degree in management information systems from The University of Charlotte and his Masters in computer science through The Georgia Institute of Technology. He is also a professional coach who guides Neurodivergent men, helping them harness their unique potential in personal and professional spheres. These dual roles allow him to integrate innovative thinking with empathy, fostering a culture of understanding and driving holistic growth. Dan is an ordained minister, Master Life Coach, and has served in church ministry through band ministry, small group leadership and board leadership. He received his own identification on the spectrum in 2019. Their book, Uniquely Us is based on published research from Dan's later-in-life adult autism diagnosis and focuses on faith, marriage and autism. It then examines how neurodiversity and faith create a complex relationship dynamic for NeuroDiverse Christian Couples. If you want to continue to learn about NDCCs, join Stephanie & Dan on their podcast, NeuroDiverse Christian Couples at: www.christianneurodiversemarriage.com.

The first episode of the Neurodiverse Love Docuseries will be released on February 14, 2026. Through this four part series, you will meet four Neurodiverse couples who share some of their lived experiences, lessons learned and the strengths, challenges and differences they’ve had in their marriages. None of the couples knew they were in a mixed neurotype relationship when they married and each shares some of the experiences that have led to more connection, understanding and acceptance of each other’s differences.In addition, you will hear from three coaches/therapists who work with Neurodiverse couples. They share their perspective on why challenges may be occurring and also provide strategies and tools for increasing connection.To contribute to this very important project or to learn more about the docuseries click here.—————————————————————————- This episode is another fantastic session fromthe 2025 Neurodiverse Love Conference. Caron Starobin, LCSW identifies how neurodivergence shows up in intimate relationships, what this means for couples in relationships where neurodivergence is in the mix, and the tools and concepts from Relational Life Therapy that constructively and compassionately nurtures relational living with a neurodiversity affirming mindset.Caron is a licensed clinical social worker and has been practicing for over 24 years. She owns Starobin Counseling, a group practice based in the D.C. Metropolitan area. Prior to her social work career, Caron was a professional modern dancer and choreographer based in Minneapolis for 10 years and loved engaging in community through the performing arts. Her therapeutic lens is deeply informed by family systems thinking, Relational Life Therapy, and years of training with experts in the fields of neurodevelopment and autism. Caron’s work is also informed by her experience providing individual, group, couples, and family therapy for autistic people and their family members dating back to 2001. Caron and her team at Starobin Counseling recognize that understanding differently wired brains benefits all of us. Caron is certified in Relational Life Therapy and is a trainer at the Relational Life Institute. She presents nationally on intimacy in neurodiverse couples and family relationships as well as on neurodiversity affirming therapy in general.You can learn more about Caron and the services her and her team offer here.—————————————————————————-If you would like to buy unlimited access to all 30+ video sessions from the 2025 Neurodiverse Love Conference click here and use code Podcast50 to get $50 off. With your purchase you will also get these FREE BONUSES: unlimited access to the 27 video sessions from the 2023 Neurodiverse Love Conference, the Neurodiverse Love Conversation Cards and Workbook. If you have any questions or need additional information please email: neurodiverselove4u@gmail.com

The first episode of the Neurodiverse Love Docuseries will be released on February 14, 2026. Through this four part series, you will meet four Neurodiverse couples who share some of their lived experiences, lessons learned and the strengths, challenges and differences they’ve had in their marriages. None of the couples knew they were in a mixed neurotype relationship when they married and each shares some of the experiences that have led to more connection, understanding and acceptance of each other’s differences.In addition, you will hear from three coaches/therapists who work with Neurodiverse couples. They share their perspective on why challenges may be occurring and also provide strategies and tools for increasing connection.To contribute to this very important project or to learn more about the docuseries click here.——————————————————————————During this episode you will hear another presentation from the 2025 Neurodiverse Love Conference. Greg Fuqua reviews the most common and important dynamic patterns he sees in ND relationships. He also reviews ways of empowering healthier patterns of growth and understanding in ND couples. More specifically GRE addresses the following topics:ADHDer’s and Autistics; The magnetism of ND polarities;Emotional Dynamics;Enmeshment vs Ownership;Co-regulation vs Self-regulation;Pursuer/avoidant; Communication Dynamics;Nuanced vs Literal;Emotional Content/Context vs Factual and Logistical Content.Greg Fuqua is a Licensed Mental Health Therapist (LMHC) in the state of Iowa and runs Divergent Counseling, Coaching and Consulting LLC that supports neurodiverse couples, neurodivergent issues, therapists and others nationwide/worldwide through counseling, trainings, consultations and coaching. He is a certified Autism Spectrum Disorder Clinical Specialist (ASDCS); a level 2 trained Neurodiverse Couples Therapist and identifies as autistic himself. Greg has appeared as a special guest and 2-time season co-host of the “Neurodiverse Love” Podcast and he is the Co-host of the “Neurodivergent Connections” YouTube channel with Mona Kay and Scott Simpson. Greg specializes in working with Autistics, ADHDers and neurotypes of all kinds, including Neurodiverse (ND) Couples, ND families, transgender and LGBTQ clients and DID, OSDD or plurality/multiplicity in clients. Greg is a trauma informed therapist and an Internal Family Systems (IFS) practitioner. You can learn more about Greg at: https://www.gregfuqua.com——————————————————————————If you would like to buy unlimited access to all 30+ video sessions from the 2025 Neurodiverse Love Conference click here and use code Podcast50 to get $50 off. With your purchase you will also get these FREE BONUSES: unlimited access to the 27 video sessions from the 2023 Neurodiverse Love Conference, the Neurodiverse Love Conversation Cards and Workbook. If you have any questions or need additional information please email: neurodiverselove4u@gmail.com

This episode is a session from the 2025 Neurodiverse Love Conference where Dr. Ashley Grubbs describes common sensory issues that come up in sex and the difficulty this can create in relationships for both people. Whether it is not tolerating moisture, struggling to enjoy kissing, or feeling overwhelmed with heat, sensory differences are a major impact on sexuality and can derail intimacy quickly. After a brief overview, Dr. Grubbs provides solutions for these different problems so that sex can feel accessible again.Dr. Ashley Grubbs is an Licensed Professional Counselor specializing in neurodiversity and sex therapy. She works to ensure couples with different neurotypes have the tools needed to improve their intimacy and connection in a way that works for them. She received her Bachelor’s degree from Texas State University, Master’s degree at University of North Texas at Dallas, and PhD in Clinical Sexology. Her dissertation, Blending the Brains will be published as a practical tool for couples.If you want to learn more about Dr. Grubbs or the services she provides you can check out her website below:www.blueharbortherapy.com——————————————————————————If you are interested in buying lifetime access to all the video sessions from the 2023 or 2025 Neurodiverse Love Conference click here. If you would like to learn more about the other resources Mona offers, including support groups, coaching and the Neurodiverse Love Conversation Cards and Workbook you can check out her website at: www.neurodiverselove.com

If you would like to learn more about the resources Mona has available, including support groups, and the Neurodiverse Love Conversation Cards and Workbook you can check out her website here.Many couples Paul Micallef works with experience conflict due to differing emotional styles and unmet emotional needs.These types of emotional misunderstandings can leave us feeling alone, unseen, unheard, unvalued.So how can we reconnect, and bridge the gap, and increase the level of emotional intimacy?During this episode from the 2025 Neurodiverse Love Conference, Paul will address:​How to effectively communicate your emotional needs.​How to deal with a partner who is uncomfortable expressing emotion.​How to avoid common traps that lead your partner to shutdown and withdraw.Paul is an autistic life coach, speaker, facilitator, and trainer, with a passion for neurodiversity and emotional intelligence. Leveraging his own lived experience, as well as insights gained from many years working with the autistic community, Paul seeks to promote emotional and psychological safety by bridging the empathy gap between mainstream and neurodivergent culture.Since discovering his own autism at the age of 30, Paul has worked in a variety of mentoring and educational roles helping parents, students, and teachers, to understand the ‘human side’ of autism.His YouTube channel, Autism From The Inside, has over 400,000 subscribers, and his annual online Lived Experience Autism Summit brings dozens of actually autistic speakers to a global audience.You can learn more about Paul here.

This session from the 2025 Neurodiverse Love Conference provides essential insights for couples navigating the complexities of relationships affected by problematic sexual behavior, including pornography addiction, emotional affairs, and compulsive behaviors. Participants will learn how relationships often begin with commitment and honesty, and how they can rupture through deception, abandonment, or abuse. Encouragement will be given to couples, offering strategies for partners to address emotional trauma and rebuild trust. With a focus on healing, communication, and professional support, this episode offers hope for recovery, even in the face of betrayal and neurodiverse challenges.Bio: Shawna, a professional certified coach, specializes in supporting women experiencing betrayal trauma, particularly those in neurodiverse marriages with autism and Asperger profiles. As the founder of Living Stones Coaching, Mentoring, and Consulting in Arizona, she authored Determined for More, reflecting their 25-year marriage journey. Kevin, also with Living Stones, mentors men struggling with problematic sexual behavior, especially those diagnosed with or considering autism (ASD1), focusing on recovery and relationship growth. Together, they offer personalized, relatable support to clients internationally, guiding couples through healing, sexual integrity, and sobriety. You can contact Shawna and Kevin at: Living StonesIf you would like to learn more about the resources Mona has available you checkout her website at: neurodiverselove.com

Being understood, by both loved ones and strangers, is one of the core heart desires of every human being. Child development becomes particularly challenged when parents’ neurodivergence repeatedly contributes to children feeling misunderstood by their primary caretakers. Years of this disconnectcan create a variety of emotional and mental health dysfunction in the children. During this session from the 2025 Neurodiverse Love Conference Giji Dennard explored several of the effects of this dilemma, then offers hope for healing through the her 3-step jumpstart program.Bio:As a passionate, creative, and articulate storyteller, Giji Dennard brings a cornucopia of academic, professional, and real-world experience to every communication--written or oral—with particular expertise in the areas of healing in parent-child relationships, identity cultivation, and Kingdom living. From state champion orator in high school to sole female speaker at the inaugural Father-Shift Conference, she has engaged and inspired audiences for over five decades with her transparency and empathy. In 2022, Giji Dennard wrote and published Strange Fruit: A Paradigm for Changing the World by Our Choices (a digital devotional) and the 2nd Edition of Hungry for Wholeness: A Call to Pursue Healing &Restoration in Your Father-Child Relationship, first published in 2012. Giji is on a mission to help you unstop the wellsprings in your life to pour out your full potential. Learn more about Giji athttps://www.wellfedresources.com/

During this session from the 2025 Neurodiverse Love Conference, Dr. Jessie Mahoney shares her thoughts on why high-achieving professional women often find themselves in relationships with neurodivergent men, sometimes without even realizing it and what the hidden pain point is that keeps showing up in these relationships, and how can it be overcome.Dr. Jessie Mahoney, a professional coach for high achieving professional women and a physician herself, shares a few powerful insights to help you navigate the challenges of your neurodiverse partnership.If you’re a successful professional woman who has recently discovered that you are in a neurodiverse relationship, this episode is for you. You'll learn:* The dynamics that often lead high-achieving women to neurodivergent partners* The most common source of tension and frustration in neurodiverse relationships* A game-changing mindset shift that can help ease conflictDrawing from her personal experience and years of coaching, Dr. Mahoney will share how to shift your approach to your relationship and move forward with greater ease and harmony. Dr. Jessie Mahoney is a Board-Certified Pediatrician, Professional Coach, and an expert in helping high-achieving women who are successful on the outside but feel frustrated and overwhelmed beneath the surface. Through her coaching, Dr. Mahoney empowers women to connect with a sense of calm, clarity, and courage—transforming their struggles into actionable steps for personal and professional growth. As the founder of Pause & Presence Coaching and Retreats, Dr. Mahoney provides both one-on-one coaching and immersive retreats designed to help women create lasting change. She is also a cohost of the Mindful Healers Podcast, where she shares strategies for mindfulness and well-being and is a certified yoga and mindfulness instructor, Dr. Mahoney is passionate about supporting healthcare professionals and women’s empowerment, serving as a wellness consultant and keynote speaker in these fields. In addition to her professional work, Dr. Mahoney has been married to her neurodivergent high school sweetheart for over 31 years. She brings a deeply personal perspective. To learn more about Dr. Mahoney and her transformative work, visit www.jessiemahoneymd.comTo learn more about the support groups, coaching services and many other resources Mona Kay has available, you can check out her website here.