Soft Skills Engineering

In this episode, Dave and Jamison answer these questions: I have been at a small startup company for 5 years now. It’s a very small technical team, 4 devs and a tech lead that contributes code & architecture. I am getting a small raise this week for my 5 years but it’s a smaller raise than I was expecting. We’re an all remote team across the globe but I had a dev co worker in the same city as me just leave the company. This has put more pressure on me as I’m the only dev in the primary time zone we operate in, everyone else is east coast or opposite side of the world. With the added pressure and some forward comments from me in one on ones with my tech lead I expected much more that I’m being offered. I think I’m supposed to quit my job but I’m terrified of that idea. This is my first job in the field and I love the work. The full stack startup experience is fun and I’ve learned so much, and I like my team a lot. I’ve never even applied to another position in tech yet, I got this one with the first application I sent out. That’s not even considering the current state of the field rapidly changing with AI and the general lack of jobs I am constantly hearing about in tech. Is there a world where I should tell my boss I’m thinking about leaving? I’ve become an integral part of the team I think that would result in movement upwards, but that sounds so risky if I haven’t even put in an application anywhere else. Should I take the old quit your job advice even when the field is so shaky? Thanks guys! And you reading the patreon names is the best part of my week too. Hi there, I’m about 4 years into my career. I’m at my second job after leaving university. The first was at a firm under 50 employees and the current is at a firm with a global footprint and several thousand employees. Both are in Europe. I moved to Europe on a work visa as a pathway to citizenship. I’ve never felt like either my past or current employer has taken advantage of my situation, but it’s important that I keep my job. At both employers, I generally work one weekend day a week to meet expectations and keep on the promotion train. I’m not the only one; several of my colleagues do the same. For now I have the time to work late, as my significant other is back home. Soon they’ll be moving over, however, and they have made clear they will not be okay with me going into work every Saturday. Maybe I’m paranoid. Maybe the expectations at work aren’t clear. Maybe this is part of software. But basically, how do I get to a point where I can checkout on weekends and not feel guilty or like I’m falling behind? Do I need to work longer weekdays? Do I need to sacrifice promotions? Do I need to get better at saying no?

In this episode, Dave and Jamison answer these questions: I have been with my current organization for 5+ years. I like the company and have generally had a good experience working here. However, the last several years I have not really gotten a raise except for the standard “merit raise”, which does not cover inflation, so effectively the last several years I have made less money than the year before. I brought this up to my EM who said there is no chance of the company increasing the merit raises to meet inflation, unless I get a promotion. However, my EM also said there are no promotions available. I don’t know if this means the company knows the job market is tough and they don’t have to pay us as much, or if the company is in dire financial straits and unable to keep salaries up with inflation. This job market is tough and I don’t know how long it would take me to find a new job, but certainly I will look. My question is basically, how can I go about getting my manager to help me level up to make myself a more attractive candidate for a future job without necessarily tipping my hand that I am job searching. On one hand I assume he knows that I might be looking. On the other hand if the company is in a bad position and we have another round of layoffs (we have had several over the past few years), I don’t want to be first on the chopping block because it looks like I have my foot out the door. I’m just wondering how much I should make it clear what my goals are to have my EM work with me, or play it close to the vest. I am a Software Engineering Manager with about 12 years of experience. I am a few months into a new role at a medium sized private company. The day I joined I found out that all ICs under Staff-level are international contractors! Surprise! My team is mostly contracted “Senior developers”. Nobody is anywhere near what I consider “Senior”. The company has a culture of aggressive performance reviews. However, I’m seeing ICs and other Managers around me who are all seriously below the bar compared to other places I’ve worked in the tech industry. I get a lot of vague pressure from the Director/CTO level to “raise the bar” and quickly exit people who aren’t meeting it. I already fired one person for performance and behavior issues, but I feel like I’m between a rock and a hard place. If I’m truly going to hold my team accountable to my and the company’s own published performance metrics, I should fire the whole team. That’s probably not good. Alternately, I can pad performance evaluations to convince my boss that everyone is meeting expectations. This also isn’t good, but feels like what everyone else is doing. Also, I’m a little queasy doing aggressive firing and performance reviews for contractors. The company treats them as full time employees (after hours on call expectations, etc) and I’m not sure how Earth lawyers would look at this situation. Help! Final wrinkle - my last two jobs I’ve lasted less than a year. I wasn’t fired but just haven’t been able to find a good fit for a little while. I’m worried that if I just leave this job 6 months in, it’ll start to look suspicious on my resume.

In this episode, Dave and Jamison answer these questions: ‌ Hi Dave and Jamison, Internal dev asker from the second half of Episode 441 checking back in. Your “ask what scared the previous dev” advice in particular has paid off handsomely; I now carry around a little book of eldritch warnings and, somehow, people keep bringing me their unknowable monsters to interpret. It’s almost as though the previous dev knew these sorts of things would happen! I didn’t set out to acquire Lovecraftian knowledge, but here we are, still in one piece. Today’s puzzle: getting busy humans to test our stuff early, while feedback can still make it into production. We’re trying to build a culture where people will poke at a rough prototype now, instead of filing a Very Concerned Ticket three hours before release. How do we get people to test and provide feedback earlier? Do we stay disarmingly warm, promise tiny time boxes, and make a public show of “you said / we changed” until participation feels like the default? Or do we wave our terminal windows around threateningly on a screen share and promise doom (and minor annoyances) until they comply? Thanks for lending sanity to the abyss, —An increasingly arcane internal apps dev I have been listening to your podcast regularly and am inspired by how the podcast and the community have grown. I am a developer with over 10 years of experience and have moved to Sweden from a country outside Europe, with the ambition to build my long-term life and career here. For several years, I have tried to take that step myself, but often encounter the same obstacle: I am told I need experience as an engineering manager — but without the role, I can’t get the experience, and without the experience, I can’t get the role. I have invested a lot of time and energy in developing myself: learning about leadership, coaching, communication, and team dynamics. Despite this, I find it difficult to see a clear path forward. With everything happening in tech right now, I sometimes feel stuck and uncertain how to break this cycle. My question is: how did you take your first step? How can one realistically enter an engineering manager role when the door seems closed without prior experience? Thank you for creating such an honest and inspiring podcast. It already means a lot to me — and to many others, I am sure.

In this episode, Dave and Jamison answer these questions: Listener Tom says, I’m a software developer with six years experience, mostly at small startups with engineering teams anywhere between 2 and 10 developers. Because these startups have been small, most of the interviews were really casual. I’d speak to either the CEO, or CTO about my past experience, and we would talk about the direction the company was heading, and whether I’d be interested in joining. They felt less like interviews, and more like free-flowing conversations. I’m now back on the market, and I’m looking at larger, more established tech companies. I can get past the tech interviews just fine, but I’m struggling with the soft-skills interviews. Compared to what I’m used to they’re a lot more structured and it feels like they’re looking for answers that fit a certain criteria and format. What advice would you give to someone used to interviewing at small startups, but now interviewing at larger companies? I took an unpaid full stack internship role at a new non-profit, and it turned out to be a team completely made of other interns. There isn’t a single experienced engineer on the team. I have gone way deeper than originally intended and am now functionally a founding engineer where the founder pretends I’m a lead engineer and calls me an intern. The founder is also hellbent on having the highest development velocity, and sometimes will contribute their own AI-generated code, often bypassing the review process especially for things I’m not comfortable signing off on like an AI-generated TOS and user agreement. I recently learned that the founder is not viewed highly in their local area after a scandal where they were accused of scamming a large sum of money, which is likely why they are doing their free community projects they started now in order to save face. This has backfired, and now people are calling their projects “AI generated schemes” despite the services being completely free. I’m not sure if I should continue contributing to these projects anymore. Since the founder rushes things to get done, walks through legal areas with their AI “lawyer,” and has a bad image, I’m worried about whether my resume will be taken seriously by potential future employers. Should I continue working for this person or is the experience not worth it?

In this episode, Dave and Jamison answer these questions: Dear Damison and Javison, I work at a very small startup (<10 engineers) and am trying to hire 2 engineers. I’m doing the intro/screener interview for these roles & am working with a recruiting firm to source candidates. My problem is that sometimes my intuition tells me that a candidate is not going to make it through our hiring process, but I can’t articulate why. Our hiring process is neither cruel nor unusual, and on paper these candidates have the skills and experience we’re looking for. But I feel a duty to let the hiring process do its work; I want to be principled about this. For reference, I’d say I screen out 2/3 of recruiter-screened candidates, and of those remaining, 2/5 of the candidates have the je ne sais quoi for which I should be saying non, merci. One made it all the way to reference checks! Do I need to do a better job rejecting these nice, smart people instead of wasting our time? Also note that I am not a manager, and although I have a lot of experience interviewing candidates, this is the first time I’ve done the *first* interview with candidates (first-ish; the recruiting firm interviews them first). Listener Jeppe says, Hi Soft Skills nation, What’s the accepted practice with staying or leaving the private chat channels of my previous team? I work at a large company and recent switched teams internally. I helped establish the team and got along really well with them. The transfer was on good terms (they invited to their Christmas dinner after the transfer!) and my managers agreed that I could always help my old team in case something came up. I’m still in the internal chat channels for my old team. I love hearing what they’re up to and catching up. They explicitly told me not to be a stranger, so I’m not! However, I don’t think there’s much business value in being in their channels. Sometimes we have more technical chats about internal tools, and it would probably be better if I had those discussion with my new team. What should I do? Should I just stay until their manager decides to kick me out? Should I be proactive and talk with the manager about it? Should I leave a teary message about how I’m going to miss them all (even if I see them regularly at lunch and outside work sometimes)?