The Messy Middle Podcast

Do you ever look around and feel like everyone else got the life you were supposed to have? The stable relationship. The career. The home. The confidence. The clear direction. Meanwhile, you're trying to rebuild after emotional abuse, betrayal, divorce, coercive control, or years spent surviving instead of thriving. In this episode of The Messy Middle, Erica explores the painful belief that you're somehow "behind" in life, and why that feeling is so common for survivors of narcissistic and em...

Let’s talk about boundaries. The real kind. Not the affirmations you repeat in the mirror and then immediately override when someone pushes. I mean lived boundaries. The ones you feel in your body before they ever become words. In this episode of The Messy Middle, I’m unpacking why boundaries feel so uncomfortable, scary, and even dangerous for so many of us, especially if you grew up without them, were punished for having them, or survived narcissistic abuse, coercive control, high-conflict ...

This episode is personal. It’s a little dark, a little tender, and honestly one of the more vulnerable things I have put 'out there'. TRIGGER WARNING - In this episode, I talk about domestic violence, abuse, trauma, and the ripple effects of generational harm. If you need to skip this one to protect your nervous system, I fully support that. Thirty years ago, my dad died. Not the stepdad who raised me for most of my life, but my biological father, whose story is woven with violence, pat...

In this raw and unfiltered episode of The Messy Middle, I’m pulling back the curtain on one of the most defining moments of my healing journey and why Inner Child Work became Key One in my Six Keys to Unfu*kwithable. I’m talking about the truth-telling, throat-tightening, survival-trained younger me. The part of me who learned early to shrink, perform, stay quiet, and swallow every truth just to stay safe. I share the deeply personal story of sitting in couples therapy with someone who ...

If you’ve ever asked yourself, “Why did I stay so long?” after an abusive or controlling relationship — this one’s for you. In this raw, unfiltered episode, we break down the real reasons survivors stay — and spoiler alert: it’s not because you’re weak, naïve, or broken. It’s because your nervous system, your hope, your history, and a masterclass in manipulation were all working against you. We unpack the shame hidden in that question, the biochemical addiction of intermittent affection, and ...