The Partnership Podcast

We hope you’re ready for the ultimate exercise in relational transparency, because this week’s episode takes a turn that none of us saw coming. Lauren and Trey sit down after a two-week batching break to look at a pattern plaguing many hetero relationships: the feeling of being "duped" after the wedding ceremony when the lingerie, the dates, and the blowjobs seem to stop, or when a partner lets themselves go.Using Dané Logan’s book Sovereign Love as a guide, Lauren opens up a conversation about entitlement, gender norms, and the cycles of caretaking and control. But things quickly shift from theoretical analysis to real-time practice. When Trey pushes back on the framework of "big P Patriarchy," an unexpected on-air conflict erupts over communication styles, interruptions, and hurt feelings. Instead of editing it out, Lauren and Trey leave the microphones running to show you the raw, awkward, and deeply human process of navigating a live trigger inside a long-term partnership.Lauren and Trey unpack the common complaint heard from straight men that the woman they married isn’t the easygoing, sexually forward woman they dated. They look at both sides of this coin, from the abrupt halt of spontaneous sexual intimacy to the lack of effort in dating and appearance from men post-marriage.Lauren utilizes Emily Nagoski’s framework to help men identify what they actually mean when they say they want more sex. Do they want connection, to feel wanted/desired, physical pleasure, or an adventure/escape?Halfway through the episode, the couple hits an original source wound. Trey shares how Lauren’s hand gestures and "expert stage posture" made him feel small and cut off, causing him to mentally pull out of the conversation.Lauren clarifies that examining patriarchal marriage history (like dowries or women lacking bank accounts) isn't about blaming individual men. It’s an invitation to wag the finger at historical systems rather than pointing it at your partner.If you and your partner are constantly getting caught in cycles of interruption, defensiveness, or sexual frustration, let's look at the patterns together.Request your free 15-minute consult at sexedforyou.com/freeconsult.About ThemLauren and Trey are partners living in Central Virginia, where Lauren owns and operates Sex Ed for You. She provides comprehensive sexuality education and embodied coaching to individuals, partners, and parents.Through a biopsychosocial approach, Sex Ed for You works to restore positive and respectful approaches to sexuality and sexual relationships, while increasing the possibility of pleasurable and safe sexual experiences, free of coercion, discrimination, and violence (World Health Organization).Sexual health is fundamental to the overall health and well-being of individuals, couples, and families, as well as to the social and economic development of communities and countries (World Health Organization). When individuals are blocked from sexual health, they are often stunted in their ability to develop sensual play, embodied connection, and enjoyment.Learn More & ConnectLearn more about Sex Ed for You: ⁠https://www.sexedforyou.com⁠Schedule a FREE CONSULT with Lauren: ⁠https://www.sexedforyou.com/freeconsult⁠Learn more about partnered communication and relational education on Instagram: ⁠https://www.instagram.com/sex_ed_for_you/⁠Subscribe to the YouTube channel for conversations about sex, partnership, communication, and love: ⁠https://youtube.com/@thepartnershippodcast⁠Important RemindersThis is not a “how to” podcast, but rather a “how they” podcast. Lauren and Trey share personal experiences, perspectives, and reflections, inviting listeners to learn from what resonates, question what doesn’t, and decide what feels aligned for their own lives.Lauren is not a therapist. She is a Certified Holistic Sexuality Educator and Embodied Intimacy and Relationship Coach.

In this follow-up to one of their most difficult episode to date, Lauren and Trey sit back down in the chairs just 48 hours later. Often in the world of relationship content, we see the "before" and the "after," but we rarely get to witness the messy, fragile middle. This conversation is a raw demonstration of what it looks like to navigate a major wounding in real-time, without rushing the healing process or demanding a premature return to normal.Trey shares the deep work he has been doing with his professional support, identifying the shadow side that led to his recent dysregulation. He explores the archetypes of the martyr and the victim, and how his fear of being trapped triggered a hostile takeover of his behavior. He discusses the importance of installing early warning systems and taking full ownership of his own mind, rather than expecting his partner to be his therapist.Lauren reflects on the physiological toll of relational trauma and the "horrified clarity" of the past few days. She shares the reality of moving through the world with a "shook" nervous system, experiencing; nausea, poor sleep, and a total lack of sexual desire as her body prioritizes its own safety. She discusses the power of being allowed to take up space in her rage and grief, resisting the patriarchal script that tells women they must hurry up and heal to keep their partners comfortable. Even while continuing her professional work with clients, she is navigating the challenge of remembering her own values and making her own healing a priority.This conversation is a demonstration of how trust is regained through play, structure, and clear limits. They experiment with slow, intentional touch, like a back scratch or laying on a chest, while maintaining a strict timer to protect Lauren’s sense of safety. They navigate the reality that sexual desire belongs on the back burner during a season of repair, honoring the first principle of pleasure: the freedom of personal choice. This is an invitation to witness two people choosing to stay in the discomfort of a "critical mass" moment, valuing the slow, honest process of rebuilding over a quick fix.Request your free 15-minute consult at sexedforyou.com/freeconsult.About ThemLauren and Trey are partners living in Central Virginia, where Lauren owns and operates Sex Ed for You. She provides comprehensive sexuality education and embodied coaching to individuals, partners, and parents.Through a biopsychosocial approach, Sex Ed for You works to restore positive and respectful approaches to sexuality and sexual relationships, while increasing the possibility of pleasurable and safe sexual experiences, free of coercion, discrimination, and violence (World Health Organization).Sexual health is fundamental to the overall health and well-being of individuals, couples, and families, as well as to the social and economic development of communities and countries (World Health Organization). When individuals are blocked from sexual health, they are often stunted in their ability to develop sensual play, embodied connection, and enjoyment.Learn More & ConnectLearn more about Sex Ed for You: ⁠https://www.sexedforyou.com⁠Schedule a FREE CONSULT with Lauren: ⁠https://www.sexedforyou.com/freeconsult⁠Learn more about partnered communication and relational education on Instagram: ⁠https://www.instagram.com/sex_ed_for_you/⁠Subscribe to the YouTube channel for conversations about sex, partnership, communication, and love: ⁠https://youtube.com/@thepartnershippodcast⁠Important RemindersThis is not a “how to” podcast, but rather a “how they” podcast. Lauren and Trey share personal experiences, perspectives, and reflections, inviting listeners to learn from what resonates, question what doesn’t, and decide what feels aligned for their own lives.Lauren is not a therapist. She is a Certified Holistic Sexuality Educator and Embodied Intimacy and Relationship Coach.

Following on from last week’s episode, Lauren and Trey pick up right where they left off; they pull back the curtain on why Lauren, a lifelong people-pleaser, is intentionally practicing standing in her ego rather than collapsing into a martyrdom apology.Trey reflects on the discomfort of watching his partner grow into a version of herself that doesn't immediately move to restore his comfort. He shares the internal dialogue he navigated while Lauren explored her agency, and how he manages the aftershocks of her development.Together, they unpack how Lauren’s lateness triggered Trey’s childhood wounds regarding his mother, proving that the emotional responses we feel in partnership often have less to do with our partner and everything to do with our primary caregivers.Drawing on the work of David Schnarch, they explore the "two-choice dilemma" and the power of the Third Domain; a space where partners can lay down their anxieties and feedback to observe them from a distance rather than being consumed by them.They close out the conversation with a reminder that while we choose our partners, we also choose their trauma and the rate at which they heal. Expect raw honesty, a few digs about boomer parents, and a deep dive into why developing the capacity to sit in discomfort is a relational superpower.If this conversation resonated, especially around setting boundaries or navigating childhood triggers, you don't have to do the work alone. Request a free 15-minute consultation for individuals and couples looking to build a more resilient, embodied connection.Request your consult at sexedforyou.com/freeconsult.About ThemLauren and Trey are partners living in Central Virginia, where Lauren owns and operates Sex Ed for You. She provides comprehensive sexuality education and embodied coaching to individuals, partners, and parents.Through a biopsychosocial approach, Sex Ed for You works to restore positive and respectful approaches to sexuality and sexual relationships, while increasing the possibility of pleasurable and safe sexual experiences, free of coercion, discrimination, and violence (World Health Organization).Sexual health is fundamental to the overall health and well-being of individuals, couples, and families, as well as to the social and economic development of communities and countries (World Health Organization). When individuals are blocked from sexual health, they are often stunted in their ability to develop sensual play, embodied connection, and enjoyment.Learn More & Connect• Learn more about Sex Ed for You: ⁠https://www.sexedforyou.com⁠ • Schedule a FREE CONSULT with Lauren: ⁠https://www.sexedforyou.com/freeconsult⁠ • Learn more about partnered communication and relational education on Instagram: ⁠https://www.instagram.com/sex_ed_for_you/⁠ • Subscribe to the YouTube channel for conversations about sex, partnership, communication, and love: ⁠https://youtube.com/@thepartnershippodcast⁠Important RemindersThis is not a “how to” podcast, but rather a “how they” podcast. Lauren and Trey share personal experiences, perspectives, and reflections, inviting listeners to learn from what resonates, question what doesn’t, and decide what feels aligned for their own lives.Lauren is not a therapist. She is a Certified Holistic Sexuality Educator and Embodied Intimacy and Relationship Coach.

Lauren and Trey pick up right where they left off, starting with a candid apology tour as they own a few mistakes listeners lovingly (and correctly) pointed out from the first two HEATED RIVALRY episodes, including a spirited mini-debate about whether the Hays Code is still “a thing.”Quick history moment: the Hays Code, officially enforced from the 1930s through the late 1960s, strictly limited what could be shown on screen, explicitly banning the depiction of homosexuality. As a result, queer stories were erased, coded, or forced into tragic endings, shaping generations of viewers’ understanding of masculinity, desire, and love in ways we’re still unraveling today.From there, a moving comment from a new subscriber opens the door to a rich conversation about masculinity, sexual orientation, and why HEATED RIVALRY feels so deeply resonant for so many people. Lauren reiterates (with feeling) that this is a show everyone should see, not just hockey fans or romance readers.The episode then turns toward Shane and Ilya’s family dynamics, exploring how a lack of choice in childhood often shows up as difficulty with choice in adulthood. Whether it’s subconsciously entering relationships where autonomy is limited or avoiding choice-making altogether, Lauren and Trey unpack this through a relational lens, drawing on David Schnarch’s work around differentiation, self-definition, and the courage it takes to choose oneself.They close by tackling a question so many people quietly hold: Do I need to be fully healed before I’m ready for a relationship? Lauren compares relational readiness to being an athlete, reminding us that while training happens in the off-season, real growth requires coaching alongside teammates. Trey adds that nothing compares to the intensity of a live game, offering compassion for how much relationships can stir us, no matter how much work we’ve done.If this conversation resonates and you’re longing for support navigating intimacy, desire, or relational growth, you don’t have to do it alone. Learn more about sex and relationship coaching and book a free consultation at www.sexedforyou.com/freeconsult.About ThemLauren and Trey are partners living in Central Virginia, where Lauren owns and operates Sex Ed for You. She provides comprehensive sexuality education and embodied coaching to individuals, partners, and parents.Through a biopsychosocial approach, Sex Ed for You works to restore positive and respectful approaches to sexuality and sexual relationships, while increasing the possibility of pleasurable and safe sexual experiences, free of coercion, discrimination, and violence (World Health Organization).Sexual health is fundamental to the overall health and well-being of individuals, couples, and families, as well as to the social and economic development of communities and countries (World Health Organization). When individuals are blocked from sexual health, they are often stunted in their ability to develop sensual play, embodied connection, and enjoyment. Learn More & Connect• Learn more about Sex Ed for You: https://www.sexedforyou.com• Schedule a FREE CONSULT with Lauren: https://www.sexedforyou.com/freeconsult• Learn more about partnered communication and relational education on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/sex_ed_for_you/• Subscribe to the YouTube channel for conversations about sex, partnership, communication, and love: https://youtube.com/@thepartnershippodcastImportant RemindersThis is not a “how to” podcast, but rather a “how they” podcast. Lauren and Trey share personal experiences, perspectives, and reflections, inviting listeners to learn from what resonates, question what doesn’t, and decide what feels aligned for their own lives.Lauren is not a therapist. She is a Certified Holistic Sexuality Educator and Embodied Intimacy and Relationship Coach.

Lauren and Trey dive into the global sensation that is Heated Rivalry, HBO’s hit hockey romance that has captured hearts and sparked important cultural conversations. The series follows rival pro hockey players Shane Hollander and Ilya Rozanov whose public feud masks a deeply charged, secret romance. It is a story that brilliantly captures the tension between attraction and obstacle that fuels desire.Lauren shares why this show resonates so deeply with her, especially through the lens of Jack Morin’s EROTIC EQUATION: Attraction + Obstacle = Excitement, and his Four Cornerstones of Eroticism: Longing & Anticipation, Violating Prohibitions, the Search for Power, and Overcoming Ambivalence. Together, they explore how episodes 1 through 5 vividly dramatize these elements in ways that feel both erotic and emotionally honest.They also discuss the continued tragedy of homophobia in sport and how the obstacle of being gay, while deeply unjust, remains a powerful and very real tension shaping the story. Rather than romanticizing this pain, Lauren and Trey name the cost of secrecy while honoring the truth of the world these characters are navigating.The conversation celebrates the role of female friendships in the series, not simply as allies, but as muses and positive influences in the lives of both Ilya and Shane. Lauren also highlights the presence of supportive, loving parenting through the character Kip's father and why representations of unconditional love matter so deeply for queer people and families alike.If you are struggling to live fully in your queerness, or if you are learning how to better celebrate and support your child’s queerness, Lauren invites you to request a free consult at www.sexedforyou.com/freeconsultStay tuned for part two of this conversation when Lauren and Trey finish the series and return to explore how the story unfolds.About Us: Lauren and Trey are partners living in Central Virginia where Lauren owns and operates, SEX ED FOR YOU. She provides comprehensive sexuality education and embodied coaching to individuals, partners, and parents.Through a biopsychosocial approach, Sex Ed for You works to restore positive and respectful approaches to sexuality and sexual relationships, as well as increase the possibility of having pleasurable and safe sexual experiences, free of coercion, discrimination and violence. (WHO)Sexual health is fundamental to the overall health and well-being of individuals, couples and families, and to the social and economic development of communities and countries. (WHO) When individuals are blocked from sexual health they are stunted from developing a sense of sensual play and enjoyment. • Learn more about Sex Ed for You at ⁠⁠https://www.sexedforyou.com⁠⁠• Schedule a FREE CONSULT with Lauren today: ⁠⁠https://www.sexedforyou.com/freeconsult⁠⁠• Learn more about partnered communication best practices on Sex Ed For You’s Instagram Page: ⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/sex_ed_for_you/⁠⁠• Subscribe to our YouTube channel for more videos about sex, partnership, communication, and love: ⁠⁠https://youtube.com/@thepartnershippodcast⁠⁠Reminders: This is not a "how to" podcast, but rather a "how they" podcast. Please listen to our opinions and then come to your own! Learn from our mistakes or give our techniques a try! It’s all up to you. Lauren is NOT a therapist. She is a Certified Holistic Sexuality Educator and Embodied Intimacy and Relationship Coach.