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Recent episodes
223. Three Mistakes Parents Make When Reconnecting with Adult Children
May 4, 2026
7m 51s
Important announcement regarding episode expiration
Jul 17, 2024
3m 18s
Important Announcement Regarding Access to This Podcast
Feb 5, 2024
1m 48s
99. Road Map to Reconnection, Part 3
Oct 18, 2021
20m 38s
97. Road Map to Reconnection, Part 1
Oct 4, 2021
16m 07s
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| Date | Episode | Topics | Guests | Brands | Places | Keywords | Sponsor | Length | |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 5/4/26 | 223. Three Mistakes Parents Make When Reconnecting with Adult Children✨ | parentingestrangement+3 | — | Reconnection ClubSubstack+1 | — | estranged adult childrenreconnection+3 | — | 7m 51s | |
| 7/17/24 | Important announcement regarding episode expiration✨ | podcast changesdigital content+3 | — | — | — | podcastepisode expiration+3 | — | 3m 18s | |
| 2/5/24 | Important Announcement Regarding Access to This Podcast✨ | podcast announcementfuture episodes+1 | — | Reconnection Club PodcastReconnectionclub.com | — | podcastannouncement+3 | — | 1m 48s | |
| 10/18/21 | 99. Road Map to Reconnection, Part 3✨ | reconnectionestrangement+3 | — | — | — | estranged adult childreconnection steps+3 | — | 20m 38s | |
| 10/4/21 | 97. Road Map to Reconnection, Part 1✨ | reconnectionestrangement+3 | — | Road Map to ReconnectionBuddhism | — | estranged adult childreconnection+3 | — | 16m 07s | |
| 9/20/21 | 95. The Deep Pain of the Rejected Parent✨ | estrangementparental pain+3 | — | — | — | estrangementparental pain+3 | — | 11m 19s | |
| 9/6/21 | 93. You're Both Adults, But Not Peers✨ | parent-child relationshipadult children+4 | — | — | — | parentingadult children+5 | — | 11m 55s | |
| 5/24/21 | 91. How to Let Them Know You've Changed✨ | estrangementparenting+3 | — | Reconnecting With Your Estranged Adult Child | — | estrangementadult child+3 | — | 7m 04s | |
| 5/19/21 | Announcement: Summer Hiatus 2021✨ | summer hiatusestrangement+3 | — | Reconnection ClubReconnecting With Your Estranged Adult Child | Southern Hemisphere | summer hiatusestrangement+3 | — | 2m 47s | |
| 5/10/21 | 89. Humility vs. Humiliation✨ | humilityhumiliation+3 | — | Reconnecting with Your Estranged Adult Child | — | humilityhumiliation+3 | — | 12m 42s | |
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| 4/26/21 | ![]() 87. When You Don't Get a Response | Parents of estranged adult children often get no response to messages they send. With every lack of response, parents become more and more discouraged. They take their child's silence as continued rejection, and they start to feel powerless. While it's true that adult children often don't respond if they don't like the message, there are other reasons why they might not reply, even if the messages lands well. In this inspiring episode, Tina suggests that getting a response shouldn't be considered the only measure of success. As long as they know their messages are helping to restore the relationship, parents can feel good about what they send. If you're thinking of offering an apology, or if you've sent apologies in the past without apparent effect, make sure you know the elements of an effective apology. (Go to https://reconnectionclub.com/87 for a link to Lesson 1 of the Reconnection Club apology course.) That's just one example of how parents can educate themselves to become confident in what they're sending to their estranged adult children. Make sure everything you send during an estrangement is both heartfelt and on target. | — | ||||||
| 4/12/21 | ![]() 85. Supportive, Yes. Doormat, No. | If you've been in the Reconnection Club environment long enough, you're probably on board with the idea of taking your estranged adult child's point of view. You want to be supportive, to validate his thoughts and feelings, while you work on repairing the relationship. But how do you do that in the face of poor behavior, without feeling like a doormat? In this week's show, Tina looks at 3 scenarios where parents are vulnerable to feeling like doormats: - Your adult child only contacts you when she needs something, then disappears again. - Your child uses foul language when he speaks to you, but you don't want to complain and risk losing contact. - You send invitations and wait for responses that never come, so you never know whether to set another place at the table. With these examples in mind, learn how to strike a balance between being supportive and being walked on. | — | ||||||
| 3/29/21 | ![]() 83. Patience Is Not Passive | Many parents rejected by an adult child are committed to working toward a healthy, mutually satisfying relationship. But they recognize that even if they work very hard and do everything right, reconciliation can take more time than they'd like. Some estranged adult children simply need more time before they're ready to try again. They may be too busy or too anxious right now to take the relationship off the back burner and re-engage. This leaves parents with nothing to do but wait. Or does it? For unwillingly estranged parents, waiting should not be a passive enterprise. If you're waiting to hear from your child, don't waste valuable time. You could be preparing right now for a better outcome in the future. In this episode, Tina explains why parents should spend their "waiting" time constructively and offers specific suggestions for things you can do. You'll be lucky if you have the time to do the recommended homework before your child comes back. If you do, it will make all the difference in a successful reconciliation. Members can discuss this episode in the General Discussion forum inside the Reconnection Club. Not a member yet? Learn more and join. Check out Tina's book, Reconnecting with Your Estranged Adult Child | — | ||||||
| 3/15/21 | ![]() 81. "We Used to Be So Close" | You'd be surprised how many estranged adult children come from close families. It's a myth that parents must have been toxic and abusive for adult children to seek estrangement. Sometimes the very closeness that characterizes a family is what underlies the adult child's need for distance. But how can that be? Aren't close families good for children? Yes, close families are wonderful environments for children to grow up in. But not every family is close in the right way for children to thrive. In this episode, Tina distinguishes between closeness and enmeshment. While closeness is healthy and feels good for everyone involved, enmeshment pumps the brakes on individuality and autonomy, especially in children. The closeness that parents enjoy in enmeshed families may be experienced by children as control or benign oppression. As always, Tina offers hope for parents to turn things around. | — | ||||||
| 3/1/21 | ![]() 79. How Do Adult Children View Estrangement? | How can they do this? Is it really okay with them? Are they happy? Research suggests answers to these questions, and Tina shares the information in this informative episode. | — | ||||||
| 2/15/21 | ![]() 77. Responding to Foul Language | Estrangement from your adult child may or may not include verbal assaults from him or her, featuring foul language. If you're faced with this kind of behavior, given the current estrangement, what's the best way to respond? You don't want to push your child further away. But does that mean you have to tolerate whatever language they may fling at you in a text? In this episode, Tina offers a 2-part response for parents. Her approach takes into account both your family's communication history and the importance of healthy boundaries, even during estrangement. Don't continue to put up with rude behavior. Know where your limits are, and calmly assert them. Do this with your child, your spouse or partner, other family members and friends. Setting boundaries, if you do it in the spirit of building better relationships, will not damage your bond with your adult children. Use the examples given in this episode to set your own boundaries around the disrespectful use of foul language. In the spirit of picking your battles, Tina also offers an opinion regarding your adult child's use of "snarky tones" with you. | — | ||||||
| 2/1/21 | ![]() 75. What Caused Your Adult Child's Estrangement? | Estrangement doesn't happen on a whim. If your adult child has cut ties with you at the moment, he has reasons that make sense to him, and that are probably long-standing. In order for the estrangement to end, those reasons usually need to be addressed and neutralized. Many parents rejected by their adult children are in such a hurry to end the estrangement that they don't take sufficient time to investigate the "why" of what happened. They miss opportunities to understand and correct missteps that led to problems in the first place. Even if they search high and low for the cause of their children's behavior, parents as a group tend to look in the wrong places for the causes of estrangement. In this informative episode, Tina helps parents slow down and focus their efforts where they'll be most fruitful. If you can pinpoint the real cause(s) of your adult child's desire for distance, you can start building a better experience for both of you in the future. | — | ||||||
| 1/18/21 | ![]() 73. The Mother-Daughter Relationship | Mothers and daughters have the potential for a very close, lifelong relationship. But not every mother-daughter pair enjoys a harmonious, supportive bond. You may have seen your friends get together with their grown daughters, and watched them with envy. Your daughter, in contrast, has become estranged. How did this happen, and why? If the mother-daughter bond is supposed to be so close, why do so many mothers and daughters become estranged? Mother-daughter relationship coach Rosjke Hasseldine has some important thoughts on that question, and she shares them in this episode. Listen to an excerpt from Tina's interview with Rosjke, who is also the author of The Mother-Daughter Puzzle and The Silent Female Scream. In this excerpt you'll hear Rosjke discussing the roots of conflict between mothers and daughters – what often goes wrong in this very special relationship, and why the problem extends beyond just you and your daughter. | — | ||||||
| 1/4/21 | ![]() 71. Three Ways Rejected Parents Give Away Their Power | It's common for rejected parents who are unwillingly estranged from an adult child to feel utterly powerless. And that's a horrible feeling in the face of a breach in an important relationship. But there are three specific assumptions parents make that leave them truly powerless. These insidious assumptions are: Your child's estrangement is entirely about something that happened in the past, Someone else is controlling (or has brainwashed) your child, and Your child has a personality disorder that's making him act this way. Each of these assumptions in the parent says, in effect, "This estrangement in entirely beyond my control." Only when parents give up any hope of having a positive impact on their troubled relationship, are they truly powerless to heal estrangement from their adult children. The other episode mentioned on this show was Episode #62, Personality Disorders and Estrangement. | — | ||||||
| 12/21/20 | ![]() 69. It's OK to Enjoy Yourself During Estrangement | It's the festive season – always a complicated time for people experiencing estrangement from family. The holidays are full of friendship, gift-giving, celebrating and creating memories. But for parents rejected by one or more of their adult children, it can feel wrong to participate. Having a good time feels … unseemly. How can parents enjoy themselves when such an important relationship is in trouble? Don't they miss their children? Don't they love them? In this episode, Tina suggests that it's not only okay, but healthy and important, for rejected parents to enjoy themselves during estrangement. The holidays are a good time to practice this. But throughout the year, if you're too sad to participate in good times and creating happy memories with others, you're adding to your pain and loss. According to Tina, you deserve better. She outlines three typical reasons why parents find it hard to let loose, and counters them with common sense and compassion. This inspiring episode will give you permission to go ahead and enjoy yourself this holiday season, and beyond. | — | ||||||
| 12/7/20 | ![]() 67. Why Can't My Child Show Some Empathy? | Your adult child, who's always been such an empathetic soul, has ruthlessly cut you off. How can such an empathetic person have no empathy for the parents who raised him? Doesn't he care that he's hurting you? It seems like a mystery. The problem of empathy is that it can't coexist with estrangement. To be empathetic, you have to stop being estranged. But if contact is painful for you, then it's a win-lose situation. Either the parent "wins" because the child is back in contact, or the child "wins" the prize of the distance she desired. In either case, someone loses. Tina explains this painful dilemma in this interesting episode. | — | ||||||
| 11/23/20 | ![]() 65. Why Your Estranged Adult Child Doesn't RSVP | It's painful when estranged adult children don't respond to invitations at the holidays. At this time of year, even a video chat would be meaningful in lieu of a family gathering. If you've issued an invitation and not heard back, you have plenty of company. It's frustrating and hurtful. Why do they do it? In this episode of the podcast, Tina suggests three reasons why an otherwise polite adult child might fail to respond to invitations during estrangement. If you haven't already sent one out, Tina recommends not issuing invitations to estranged adult child. However, she does give two exceptions to this general rule. | — | ||||||
| 11/9/20 | ![]() 63. What You Resist Persists | When you go in for a vaccination, the nurse might tell you to relax just before he gives you the needle. Obviously, relaxing is not natural in a situation like this. And yet resisting the needle creates tension, and may even make the shot more painful. Resistance is not only futile, it often creates more pain than does acceptance. Thus, acceptance of a painful process can actually make it less painful than resistance. There's a lesson here for parents of estranged adult children. They naturally resist silence, the inherent rejection, and the estrangement itself. Importantly, parents also resist their estranged adult children's versions of the relationship. They defend themselves against unfair or inaccurate depictions of themselves as parents and as people. And while this is natural, it may not be the best response to estrangement. Nor is it the best response to any unwanted situation. In this episode, Tina urges you to embrace the current reality of estrangement from your child, in order to find peace and freedom in an otherwise losing battle with reality. She explains why acceptance doesn't mean giving up. For more on handling estrangement from your adult child, see Tina's book, Reconnecting With Your Estranged Adult Child: Practical Tips and Tools to Heal Your Relationship. | — | ||||||
| 10/26/20 | ![]() 61. Did Therapy Turn Your Child Against You? | It's not unusual at all for an adult child to cut off parents after getting into therapy. And the cut-off may extend to other family members and even old friends. When this happens, it's tempting to blame it on therapy. Your child was fine and so was your relationship, until he went into counseling. If it seems your child has been brainwashed by a counselor or therapist and that's why she's become estranged from family, that's understandable. But there are underlying assumptions there that might simply not be true. One is that your child's therapist is not an ethical professional. And another is that estrangement is not your child's own idea. Both of these are statistically questionable, as Tina points out in this informative episode. | — | ||||||
| 10/12/20 | ![]() 59. How to Survive Birthdays During Estrangement (Yours and Theirs) | Will your estranged child send you birthday wishes this year? Should you celebrate your child's birthday even though she's not currently speaking to you? How do you survive not only your own birthday without them, but theirs? Estrangement doesn't respect birthdays. In many or perhaps most cases, you'll be disappointed if you expect your child to contact you on your birthday, or answer a text from you on theirs. For tips on whether to send something on your child's birthday, listen to Episode 33. This episode (#59) is all about how to survive the day well, and even have a good and meaningful birthday, while you're estranged. The key is to take responsibility for your own experience, and plan ahead. | — | ||||||
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Chart Positions
2 placements across 2 markets.
Chart Positions
2 placements across 2 markets.

