What The If?

What the if birds aren't actually birds? Play it straight for a second: somewhere between 1959 and 1971, the government quietly swaps every bird for a surveillance drone, and the cover-up runs deeper than a single federal agency. Chasing the premise turns up some genuinely real science — Cold War spy satellites that parachuted film canisters down from space to be caught midair by pilots, phased-array antennas that stitch many small dishes into one giant eye, and the actual military project to train pigeons to pilot missiles. Chase a ridiculous question far enough and you land somewhere inspiring: face to face with how inventive people get when they're trying to understand the world. —— When she's not studying zombie fungus at Harvard or helping us break the universe every week, our very own Gaby Paniccia writes science fiction. Her short story "The Automatic Grocery Store" is now featured on the popular podcast Escape Pod! Listen here: https://escapepod.org/2026/02/19/escape-pod-1033-the-automatic-grocery-store/ —— Check out our membership rewards! Visit us at Patreon.com/Whattheif —— Got an IF of your own? Want to have us consider your idea for a show topic? Send YOUR IF to us! Visit https://whattheif.com/contact and let us know what's in your imagination. No idea is too small, or too big! Keep On IFFin', Philip, Matt & Gaby

A conspiracy theory went viral claiming that on August 12th, 2026, Earth will lose gravity for seven seconds. The internet did what the internet does, and millions of people started talking about it. So we decided to take the question seriously — what the if gravity actually clocked out for seven seconds? Let's just say you might want to start shopping for bungee cords now. And maybe a bouncy castle. This episode was inspired by an Instagram post from the now-mysteriously-vanished user Mr. Donya OF, where all great science begins. --- Find out more about Gaby's science fiction short story! Here are the links for the anthology. The physical copy can be ordered here : https://www.neonhemlock.com/books/luminescent-machinations-queer-tales-of-monumental-invention The ebook can be ordered here: https://www.neonhemlock.com/ebooks/luminescent-machinations-queer-tales-of-monumental-invention

We first shared this one on Super Bowl Sunday 2019 — what better weekend to bring back nature's ultimate underdog? Enjoy this encore presentation! ---- The HAGFISH, little known, little respected... greatly feared... by sharks! Is the hagfish the Spiderman of the Sea? This little slimy fish can spit out a slimy blob that BLOWS UP REAL BIG. What the if... WE could defend ourselves like that? Imagine the sport! In celebration of the SUPER BOWL, we present a special episode: The SLIME BOWL. Let the games begin! Don't miss an IF! Subscribe: linktr.ee/whattheifshow Share your love of the IF! Drop us a review: itunes.apple.com/podcast/id1250517051?mt=2&ls=1 THANKS and Keep On IFFin'! -- Philip, Matt & Gaby

We're taking a break this week while Philip recovers from the 'double-whammy' of flu and COVID boosters. (Science works, but sometimes it makes you nap!) However, we couldn't let January 7th pass unnoticed. On this day in 1610, Galileo first spotted Jupiter's moon, Io. To celebrate, we’ve unlocked the vault for an encore of one of our most popular episodes ever. Strap in for a tour of a lava-covered world with Robin Andrews in... "Walking on IO". ---- DR. ROBIN GEORGE ANDREWS, science writer for The NY Times, National Geographic, Scientific American, and many more, joins us with an IF that'll keep you on your feet: What The IF we could walk on Jupiter's ultra volcanic moon, IO? Would you walk on a hot pizza? If so, you're ready for the trip! The views of Jupiter would be spectacular, but bring your kevlar umbrella because lava's gonna come flyin' out of the sky. One of the most spectacular places in the solar system, Io is also terribly mysterious, bizarre, and confusing to even the greatest scientists of our time. Pack your bags, bring some galoshes, and let's go! --- Robin Andrews is a doctor of experimental volcanology, a full-time freelance science journalist, a part-time photographer, a scientific consultant, an occasional lecturer, public speaker and explain-how-volcanoes-work TV guest, as well as a pending author of a rather curious book. He can tell you exactly how powerful the Death Star is, how cryovolcanoes on alien worlds work, why a supervolcano probably isn’t what you think it is, and why the Moon is shrinking. His work has appeared in THE NEW YORK TIMES, THE ATLANTIC, NATIONAL GEOGRAPHIC, SCIENTIFIC AMERICAN, EARTHER, GIZMODO, FORBES, THE VERGE, ATLAS OBSCURA, DISCOVER MAGAZINE, WIRED and elsewhere. VISIT his website: robingeorgeandrews.com -------- REVIEW the show: itunes.apple.com/podcast/id1250517051?mt=2&ls=1 SUBSCRIBE for free: pod.link/1250517051 EINSTEIN'S WAR by our very own MATT STANLEY is on sale now! The Washington Post says "Stanley is a storyteller par excellence." A starred review recipient from KIRKUS, PUBLISHER'S WEEKLY, and BOOKLIST. www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/60811…81524745417 Thanks & Keep On IFFin'! -- Philip, Matt & Gaby

What the if time suddenly started running backwards? Your breakfast un-eats itself, LEGO sets come pre-assembled, and you get younger every day. The dead have unfunerals, your room cleans itself, and teenagers slowly regress through middle school—backwards. Professor Ian Durham of Saint Anselm College stops by to explain the real physics behind time reversal and why photons might start shooting out of your eyeballs. Want to see time reversal in action? Check out The Palindrome Paradox, the mind-bending short film Ian recommends: https://youtu.be/hUcXGv-NzFQ?si=X086RFpXEj0ZNJmX Explore more physics at the Foundational Questions Institute—Ian's top 5 physics stories for 2025 will be out in a week or two on the FQxI Podcast Series: https://qspace.fqxi.org/podcasts And check out FQxI Master Classes, where Ian's course on the nature of time will be out within the year: https://qspace.fqxi.org/qac --- Find out more about Gaby's science fiction short story! Here are the links for the anthology. The physical copy can be ordered here : https://www.neonhemlock.com/books/luminescent-machinations-queer-tales-of-monumental-invention The ebook can be ordered here: https://www.neonhemlock.com/ebooks/luminescent-machinations-queer-tales-of-monumental-invention

What the if the Sun suddenly turned green? Your pizza now looks like charcoal because all red things go black. Stop signs become invisible. The sky shifts from cheerful blue to permanent dusk. And plants? They absolutely despise green light—they reflect it because green photons are the M&Ms they pick out of the bowl. So with a green Sun, photosynthesis grinds to a halt, oxygen tanks, and everything that breathes is in serious trouble. The only potential survivors might be weird microbes at deep ocean vents who never cared about sunlight anyway. On the bright side, colorblind people might finally see more colors, and whoever figures out the right makeup for green light is about to make a fortune—right before we all suffocate. --- Find out more about Gaby's science fiction short story! Here are the links for the anthology. The physical copy can be ordered here : https://www.neonhemlock.com/books/luminescent-machinations-queer-tales-of-monumental-invention The ebook can be ordered here: https://www.neonhemlock.com/ebooks/luminescent-machinations-queer-tales-of-monumental-invention