Come As You Are

A listener in his eighties wants to know if there’s an expiration date on his sex life, and how to reconnect in the bedroom with his wife. Luckily, Emily is writing a new book about sex in long-term relationships. She delves deep into what the research reveals about couples who sustain a strong sexual connection over many years. Plus, she shares practical, science-backed sex advice on aging and navigating your changing body. If you have a question for Emily, call the Come As You Are hotline at (646) 397-8557‬ or send a voice memo to emily@pushkin.fm. Tell us your pronouns and pseudonym (pick a name, any name!) Your question might be answered on the show. Books mentioned by Emily: “Magnificent Sex” by Dr. Peggy Kleinplatz “Black Girls Guide to Surviving Menopause” by Omisade Burney-Scott “What Fresh Hell Is This?” by Heather Corinna “Why Good Sex Matters” by Nan Wise ”Couples Sexuality After 60” by Barry and Emily MSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

We switch things up this week as Mo challenges Emily to watch and rate a sex scene from the popular TV show “Ted Lasso." Emily rarely watches sex scenes since they often create the myths she works so hard to dispel, but she agrees to endure this torture for the good of our sex education. The scene prompts a deep conversation about vulnerability in sex, the absolute prison of masculinity, and what the dual control model can teach us about our porn habits. If you have a question for Emily, call the Come As You Are hotline at (646) 397-8557‬ or send a voice memo to emily@pushkin.fm. Tell us your pronouns and pseudonym (pick a name, any name!) Your question might be answered on the show.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

For some people, sexual desire shows up totally spontaneously and out of the blue. But that’s not the case for this week’s listener, who wants to have sex with their girlfriend, but isn't feeling the same excitement as they did at beginning of the relationship. Emily introduces the science of responsive desire, which is not only totally normal and healthy, but also a more common way of experiencing desire. You can take Petra Zebroff's Questionnaire for Turn-on Initiation Preferences here. If you have a question for Emily, call the Come As You Are hotline at (646) 397-8557‬ or send a voice memo to emily@pushkin.fm. Tell us your pronouns and pseudonym (pick a name, any name!) Your question might be answered on the show. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The pandemic is really killing the mood and making it hard to prioritize pleasure. A listener calls in about losing the motivation to have sex, even with herself. To help answer the listener's question, Emily introduces groundbreaking research known as the "dual control model" and offers a simple but radical shift in the way we think about horniness. If you have a question for Emily, call the Come As You Are hotline at (646) 397-8557‬ or send a voice memo to emily@pushkin.fm. Tell us your pronouns and pseudonym (pick a name, any name!) Your question might be answered on the show. SHOW NOTES: Check out Emily’s free worksheets on her website to start applying the science of the dual control model to your own life. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Sex educator and bestselling author Emily Nagoski answers questions about sex with the latest science. Along the way, she busts cultural myths and teaches you what's true with the help of groundbreaking research. Come As You Are will guide you towards a life with more confidence, pleasure, and joy. Coming November 16 from Pushkin Industries and Madison Wells.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.