Control the Flame

Breaking the Cycle of Reactivity: A Journey to Mindful ResponseHave you ever had a moment where you reacted strongly to something, and later wished you'd handled it differently? That's the cycle of reactivity. And in this episode of Control the Flame, Clare Bradley breaks down exactly how that cycle works and, more importantly, how to interrupt it. Clare explores: - The stages of emotional escalation – from initial trigger to full reaction - How thoughts amplify feelings and push us toward responses we later regret - Warning signs that indicate you're moving toward heightened reactivity - Practical interruption techniques: deep breathing, pausing, self-talk, and reframing - The importance of creating mental space before responding - Real stories of transformation from people who've learned to break their reactive patterns Whether you're navigating relationship breakdown, involved in legal proceedings, or simply recognizing that your reactions are damaging your relationships, this episode offers practical, evidence-based strategies for change. Clare also shares information about structured support services like DAPP (Domestic Abuse Perpetrator Programme) and coaching options for those ready to commit to genuine transformation. Understanding the cycle is the first step. Breaking it is the work. This episode shows you how.

In this captivating episode, Meg Hall shares her remarkable story of growing up in a rage-filled home, where she learned early on how to read people and de-escalate tense situations. These survival skills became invaluable as Meg pursued a career as a psychiatric nurse, where she gained a reputation for her exceptional ability to calm even the most distressed patients. Meg also opens up about her marriage to a man much like her father, and how she continued to rely on these skills in her personal life. Through her journey, Meg reflects on the unexpected gifts that come from surviving in a chaotic environment and how those experiences shaped her life and career.

In this raw and moving episode, Lucy Waide shares her journey through a tumultuous decade, marked by life’s darkest challenges and her remarkable third comeback. Lucy bravely opens up about her mental health struggles, including a suicide attempt, and how she found the resilience to rebuild her life. As a co-author of Beyond The Ordinary: Discover the Power of Creative and Neurodivergent Women, alongside our host Clare, Lucy discusses the creative process and the unique strengths of neurodivergent women. This powerful conversation explores the courage to overcome adversity, the importance of mental health, and the hope found in second chances. Lucy’s story is one of survival, creativity, and the enduring power of the human spirit.

In this inspiring episode, I sit down with Tomeka Jones, a true embodiment of resilience and strength. Tomeka shares her powerful story, starting with the challenges of her early life, her time in the military, and the professional struggles that followed. From navigating personal setbacks to experiencing pivotal moments of growth, Tomeka opens up about how these experiences shaped her mindset and resilience. Tune in to hear her strategies for bouncing back, overcoming adversity, and finding purpose and strength in life’s most challenging moments.

In this inspiring episode, I sit down with Michelle Steiner, a passionate advocate for people with learning disabilities. Despite being told that college wasn't an option, Michelle overcame the odds to earn her bachelor’s degree, become a writer, speaker, and para educator, and pursue her dream job. Michelle shares her powerful story of resilience, determination, and how she continues to break through barriers. She offers insights into how we can support individuals with learning challenges and create a more inclusive world. Tune in to hear her uplifting message and learn about the power of perseverance in the face of adversity.

In this powerful episode, Clare sits down with Mo Ford, a coach, consultant, and facilitator with two decades of experience in the charity sector, to explore the intricacies of vicarious trauma, compassion fatigue, and the healing power of breathwork. Mo shares her journey from Scotland to London and how she now supports social leaders, small business owners, and third sector organisations in communicating with courage and authenticity. Together, Clare and Mo delve into practical strategies for nervous system regulation, avoiding burnout, and fostering spaces of true belonging. Whether you're a leader, a coach, or someone navigating the complexities of trauma, this episode offers deep insights and tools to help you show up as your authentic self and create meaningful connections with others.Live and Breathe Coaching Ltd.

In this thought-provoking episode, we sit down with David Breakspear, a passionate Lived Experience Influencer and Peer Mentor, to explore the complex world of prison reform and rehabilitation. David shares his personal journey through the prison system, shedding light on the harsh realities of life behind bars, including issues like overcrowding, violence, and the lack of educational opportunities.David’s unique insights offer a compelling narrative on the importance of fairness, mental health support, and holistic approaches in the rehabilitation process. We delve into how the system's flaws impact not just those incarcerated, but society at large, creating a ripple effect that extends far beyond prison walls.But this episode isn't just about the challenges—David also highlights the positive changes that can happen when we empower individuals with lived experience to have a voice. He shares how peer mentoring and coaching are making a difference, helping others to build confidence, resilience, and skills to contribute to meaningful change.Join us as we discuss David's life, and the strength and resilience he found to enable him to change the path his life was heading on.Whether you're passionate about social justice, interested in the criminal justice system, or simply curious about the power of lived experience, this episode is a must-listen.David can be found on Linkedin (2) David Breakspear | LinkedIn

In this enlightening episode of Control the Flame, we are joined by Kristen Cunliffe a dynamic financial planner, educator, and coach based in the North West of England. Born in Blackpool and proudly Northern, Kristen has a passion for helping people understand and master their finances. She specialises in educating young people, including elite athletes, about money management and financial planning, making complex concepts accessible through her personable approach and knack for injecting humour into her teaching. With a strong belief in empowering individuals to unlock their money stories, Kristen helps clients improve their financial peace by understanding their attitudes and beliefs about money. Her approach is rooted in trust, honesty, authenticity, and integrity. As a business owner, parent, and advocate for equality, Kristen supports others in her community and champions the rights of women, young people, and the LGBTQ+ community. Kristen’s clients love her for the genuine care she shows and her dedication to helping them achieve their financial goals and improve their overall wellbeing. She is passionate about enterprise, psychology, and the arts, and brings her creative nature into her coaching and educational work.Join us as we delve into the intricate relationship between finance and emotions. Discover how effective communication is key to managing financial stress and fostering financial harmony in relationships. Kristen shares valuable strategies for couples and families to discuss finances without conflict and how to approach these conversations with empathy and understanding.We explore the concept of financial infidelity, the steps to take if you discover it in your relationship, and practical advice on successful budgeting and building an emergency fund. Tune in to learn actionable steps to start improving your financial situation and maintaining a positive mindset through financial challenges.

In this powerful episode of our podcast, we welcome Kate Brindley from Kate Brindley Coaching to share her remarkable journey from surviving to thriving. Kate bravely opens up about her own experiences with trauma and the challenges faced by her now adult children. Through her heartfelt story, Kate reveals how she has transformed her personal struggles into a source of strength and inspiration. As a dedicated Thriving through Trauma coach, Kate discusses how she uses her life experiences to empower others on their healing journeys. Join us for an inspiring conversation about resilience, growth, and the incredible power of turning pain into purpose.