Doing It Together: Making Sense of Low Libido, Sex, and Intimacy in Marriage.

What happens when loving someone means letting go of the need to fix them?Derek shares his journey of realizing that his attempts to rescue and support his wife were unintentionally creating distance between them. After years of trying to pull her out of pain and show her how wonderful life could be, he discovered that what she needed most wasn't someone to turn on the light—it was someone willing to sit with her in the darkness.Together, Janna and Derek explore the difference between compassion and rescuing, how shame and discomfort can impact intimacy, and why seeing your partner as "broken" can prevent true connection.Looking for where to start? Get Janna's Intro Videos for men and women.Ready to learn more? Janna's Wanting It More Foundations self-paced course for women is always open for registration.Ready to learn as a couple? Get all the details about Janna's coaching program for couples, Doing It Together. Next round runs Oct./Nov. 2026.

When Lauren was invited to share her story on the podcast, she hesitated. Talking publicly about your sex life isn't easy—especially when your experience doesn't fit the cultural script of what a "healthy" woman is supposed to want. Then she surprised us with an unexpected suggestion: what if her sister joined the conversation?What followed was a candid, funny, and moving discussion between two sisters whose experiences with sex, desire, marriage, motherhood, and womanhood couldn't look more different on the surface. Together, they unpack the impossible expectations placed on women, the messages they inherited about sexuality, and the ways both high desire and low desire can leave women feeling like they're somehow falling short. Looking for where to start? Get Janna's Intro Videos for men and women.Ready to learn more? Janna's Wanting It More Foundations self-paced course for women is always open for registration.Ready to learn as a couple? Get all the details about Janna's coaching program for couples, Doing It Together. Next round runs Oct./Nov. 2026.

At the end of each eight-week round of Doing It Together, Janna hosts a farewell call where couples gather together and she asks one powerful question: What surprised you most about your Doing It Together journey?In this episode, you’ll hear honest reflections from real couples about their experiences — what they learned, what they had to unlearn, and how their relationships changed along the way. Their stories are a reminder that when people are willing to do the work and face difficult truths, profound shifts can happen, intimacy can deepen, and new ways of connecting become possible.Looking for where to start? Get Janna's Intro Videos for men and women.Ready to learn more? Janna's Wanting It More Foundations self-paced course for women is always open for registration.Ready to learn as a couple? Get all the details about Janna's coaching program for couples, Doing It Together. Next round runs Oct./Nov. 2026.

What if the problem in your sex life isn’t low libido… but the pressure, expectations, and conditioning you’ve been carrying for years? In this conversation, Erica shares how she spent years believing she was broken, trying everything from therapy to self-help advice to “fix” her lack of desire — only to discover that the real issue had far more to do with safety, pressure, and the scripts women are taught about sex and relationships.Together, Erica and Janna unpack the messages many women grow up with around sex, marriage, motherhood, and obligation, and explore what begins to shift when couples stop focusing on performance and start building experiences rooted in curiosity, comfort, and connection. Looking for where to start? Get Janna's Intro Videos for men and women.Ready to learn more? Janna's Wanting It More Foundations self-paced course for women is always open for registration.Ready to learn as a couple? Get all the details about Janna's coaching program for couples, Doing It Together. Next round runs Oct./Nov. 2026.

Anthony shares his journey from defensiveness and disconnection to truly hearing his partner for the first time. Like many couples, they found themselves stuck in a cycle of repeating the same conversations, hoping something would finally click… but real change didn’t begin until willingness entered the picture.Anthony opens up about the moment he recognized how deeply his upbringing had shaped his expectations around intimacy—and the courage it took to face that truth. His story is a reminder that while change is simple in theory, it requires a willingness to listen, grow, and see things differently. If you’ve ever felt like your partner just isn’t getting it, this episode offers a hopeful glimpse into what’s possible when they finally do.Looking for where to start? Get Janna's Intro Videos for men and women.Ready to learn more? Janna's Wanting It More Foundations self-paced course for women is always open for registration.Ready to learn as a couple? Get all the details about Janna's coaching program for couples, Doing It Together. Next round runs Oct./Nov. 2026.

I’ve been scratching my head for years trying to figure out how to help couples talk to each other about sex and share the helpful information on the podcast.I knew that a simple, non-threatening video was necessary for both men and women to be able to send to their partners to explain the basic concepts. I also knew that I needed to make the podcast accessible for newbies with an easy “start here” place to go (with 188 episodes, it just doesn’t work to begin with episode 1, although many try…).And, lastly, I knew that both men and women needed guidance on how to start the conversation with their partners in a way that felt safe and doable. And I’m SO FREAKIN’ HAPPY to announce that I have accomplished all of this and am ready to share it with you. Today’s episode on the podcast is part of the men’s side of this "beginner's guide” but I’m sure everyone will enjoy it. I’ve edited 6 stories together- 3 from men and 3 from women, to highlight the commonalities of the sex struggle so many heterosexual couples face.It’s an episode that I hope makes you see the bigger picture of what we are all facing from culture with individual differences sprinkled in.If you want the full beginner’s guide, starting with the intro videos, here are the links:Women’s VideoMen’s Video(If you are looking for the conversation guides, sign-up for the videos and you’ll find them on the next page.)Looking for where to start? Get Janna's Intro Videos for men and women.Ready to learn more? Janna's Wanting It More Foundations self-paced course for women is always open for registration.Ready to learn as a couple? Get all the details about Janna's coaching program for couples, Doing It Together. Next round runs Oct./Nov. 2026.

Do you ever feel like you are the one with all the "baggage" in your relationship?This is exactly how Liz felt for years. In every category she looked- religious, cultural upbringing, and past life choices, she felt inferior to her spouse. To make up for the gap, she tried to be the “perfect” wife by providing her husband sex and keeping her body up even through four pregnancies. No surprise, it didn’t work out great.Join us as we talk through:The two major turning points in her marriage and how they helped transform her relationship. Her reckoning with the cultural and religious teachings she was raised on.What she’s experimenting with now to reclaim her joy and autonomy.Looking for where to start? Get Janna's Intro Videos for men and women.Ready to learn more? Janna's Wanting It More Foundations self-paced course for women is always open for registration.Ready to learn as a couple? Get all the details about Janna's coaching program for couples, Doing It Together. Next round runs Oct./Nov. 2026.

In my work, I highlight the terrible things that gender inequality does to a couple’s sexual relationship but it extends far beyond the bedroom impacting connection, financial health, individual happiness, physical health, and, ultimately, relationship satisfaction.Which is why as soon as I finished the book, “Equal Partners: Improving Gender Equality at Home” by Kate Mangino, I knew I needed her to come on the podcast.Thankfully, she agreed 🙂In this episode of the podcast, we talk about:The consequences of not working towards equality in the home as well as the benefitsCommon excuses for not working towards equalityHow men can grow into equal partners Lessons from 40 men who are working towards equality in their marriagesAdvice for women trying to move towards gender equalityYou can find out more about Kate and her work here: https://www.katemangino.com/Looking for where to start? Get Janna's Intro Videos for men and women.Ready to learn more? Janna's Wanting It More Foundations self-paced course for women is always open for registration.Ready to learn as a couple? Get all the details about Janna's coaching program for couples, Doing It Together. Next round runs Oct./Nov. 2026.

This episode provides an update on what Janna and her husband are working on in their sex life. Both talk about how anxiety affects their sexual experience in different ways. Janna shares her anxieties about:trying to have an orgasm and it not progressinggetting in her head about what “should” happen nextbeing worried about his experience and if he's "getting bored”Dwayne shares his anxieties about:being a “perfect” partner and feeling inadequatetrying to communicate to connect the progression of moving from something that feels good into “What to do next?”This episode will remind you that you aren't alone in your sexual struggles and that all couples are a work in progress in the bedroom. Looking for where to start? Get Janna's Intro Videos for men and women.Ready to learn more? Janna's Wanting It More Foundations self-paced course for women is always open for registration.Ready to learn as a couple? Get all the details about Janna's coaching program for couples, Doing It Together. Next round runs Oct./Nov. 2026.

We're re-releasing one of our most listened to episodes! If you’ve been curious about what the concepts of Doing It Together can do for your sex life and marriage in the long term, you'll want to listen to Justin and Sandra's story.Married for 19 years, they took Doing It Together two years ago and they graciously share VERY specific details about what their relationship and sex life look like now. They open up about how they’ve learned to talk, play, remain curious, and change things up through life’s ups and downs.They also share how their marriage has changed outside the bedroom and the routines they’ve incorporated to keep their connection at the forefront of their marriage. You can listen to Justin and Sandra's personal stories by listening to these previous episodes: Justin's Story in Episode 82Sandra's Story in Episode 74The Michelle Mays episode on Betrayal Trauma can be found here: Episode 108Looking for where to start? Get Janna's Intro Videos for men and women.Ready to learn more? Janna's Wanting It More Foundations self-paced course for women is always open for registration.Ready to learn as a couple? Get all the details about Janna's coaching program for couples, Doing It Together. Next round runs Oct./Nov. 2026.

Justin joins me for a foundational episode in which we zoom out and discuss the role that men play when their wives have “low libido”. He starts off by sharing how he felt when his wife stopped wanting to have sex with him- the feelings of confusion and worrying if he had done something wrong.Then we take a journey through the unique ways men can contribute to a great sex life, how to create a comfortable, pressure-free environment and the work they can do outside of the bedroom.I’m so grateful to work alongside Justin in supporting men and if you’d like to hear more of his story, you can listen to Episode 82 as well as Episode 148 with his wife, Sandra.Looking for where to start? Get Janna's Intro Videos for men and women.Ready to learn more? Janna's Wanting It More Foundations self-paced course for women is always open for registration.Ready to learn as a couple? Get all the details about Janna's coaching program for couples, Doing It Together. Next round runs Oct./Nov. 2026.

In today’s episode, I’m pulling back the curtain on one of the most important elements of moving towards freedom in your relationship and that is…a reset from sex.It’s something that you may have heard many times on the podcast in interviews with alumni of Doing It Together but it’s the first time I’ve addressed it directly.If you are tired of the mental energy sex is taking up in your life right now, I highly encourage you to listen to this conversation.Looking for where to start? Get Janna's Intro Videos for men and women.Ready to learn more? Janna's Wanting It More Foundations self-paced course for women is always open for registration.Ready to learn as a couple? Get all the details about Janna's coaching program for couples, Doing It Together. Next round runs Oct./Nov. 2026.

Since we’re headed into a time of the year where there may be some extra space as a couple, I thought it would be a good idea to talk about expectations around sex and special occasions. I know this happens more often with birthdays and vacations but it’s possible that in the lull between Christmas and New Years some pressure could creep in.In this short episode, we discuss why this happens, the harm it can cause and what to do instead. Plus we talk about what gifts husbands should never get their wives 🙂.Looking for where to start? Get Janna's Intro Videos for men and women.Ready to learn more? Janna's Wanting It More Foundations self-paced course for women is always open for registration.Ready to learn as a couple? Get all the details about Janna's coaching program for couples, Doing It Together. Next round runs Oct./Nov. 2026.