
Golf Is Ruining My Life
by Tom Green & Tom Price
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On the show
Recent episodes
We Found Our Egypt Finalists (In The Most Ridiculous Way Possible) 🐪
Sep 3, 2026
34m 30s
MATT WILLIS | He Secretly Planned An Entire Busted Tour Around Golf Hotels 😂 #TalkBirdieToMe
Aug 27, 2026
40m 35s
I've Stopped Using Tees Completely
Aug 26, 2026
36m 51s
Tom Cruise Landed On Our Golf Course
Aug 23, 2026
35m 22s
Jon Rahm Is Back... So What Happens To LIV Now? 👀
Aug 19, 2026
36m 58s
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| Date | Episode | Topics | Guests | Brands | Places | Keywords | Sponsor | Length | |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 9/3/26 | We Found Our Egypt Finalists (In The Most Ridiculous Way Possible) 🐪 | The day has finally come. We've whittled nine Email Corner winners down to just TWO finalists who'll battle it out live on the podcast for the last place on the plane to Egypt with our friends at Golf Breaks. 🐪 The format? We open our own recent scorecards, find our worst hole on the front nine, and whoever's name sits at that number gets eliminated. Genuinely one man's double bogey at Porters Park ended someone's chances of a free golf trip. We're calling it genius. ITV, our line is open. 📞 EGYPT TRIP (15th -19th Nov we'll be there) 🐪⛳ - https://www.golfbreaks.com/en-gb/holidays/cairo/hilton-pyramids-golf-resort/packages/7dc84fcf-8016-4e82-8207-cb000d42ddf0/ And the limited edition GREY hoodies Email - [email protected] Discord Tik Tok Youtube Merch Tour Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices | 34m 30s | ||||||
| 8/27/26 | MATT WILLIS | He Secretly Planned An Entire Busted Tour Around Golf Hotels 😂 #TalkBirdieToMe | WE'RE BACK with a new episode of the Talk Birdie To Me Series and this week we're joined by Busted's Matt Willis, who might be the most golf-obsessed guest we've ever had on. 30 minutes of chat about going from zero to completely hooked in three years, why he burned through ten lessons in three weeks, and the day he broke 90 and called it one of the happiest moments of his life. 🏌️ We also find out how he sat down with his tour manager seven months in advance and secretly routed an entire Busted tour around golf hotels (the band thought they'd just lucked into spa breaks 😅), how golf fits into his sobriety, and why teeing off in front of one bloke with a camera was more terrifying than playing the O2 the night before. Plus the raffle addiction that's quietly getting out of hand, his grip overhaul ahead of Wentworth, and his DREAM four ball. 👀 MASSIVE thanks to our friends at GOLF NOW for helping make this series happen and bringing it to the masses. Check out all the amazing deals on their site below and remember use code GIRML10 on the app to get an extra 10% off HOT DEALS https://www.golfnow.co.uk You can also take the Golf Now quiz to find out the exact GOLFER you are below - https://cloud.marketing.golfnow.co.uk/quiz Make sure you hit that subscribe button as we’ll be back every other Friday for another episode of Talk Birdie To Me! - New episode of GIRML... Monday, Thursday and Friday (fortnightly) Email - [email protected] Discord Tik Tok Youtube Merch Tour IGOLF Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices | 40m 35s | ||||||
| 8/26/26 | I've Stopped Using Tees Completely | TP has become That Guy. He's ditched tees entirely, chucks the ball straight down on the deck and hits three wood off it, and reckons it's the coolest thing in golf (very John Daly coded, apparently). We get into why compressing a three wood feels so much better than releasing a driver, and whether he's onto something or just going through the cycle every golfer goes through. We also put the Shot Scope LM1 through its first proper session (still not sponsored, still raving about it 🤷), and it sparks a proper generational divide: does anyone remember pacing out yardages from the 150 marker before GPS existed? TG flatly refuses to believe it ever happened. Settle it for us in the comments. 👀 Next Thursday we start picking the winners for Egypt with a live head-to-head on the show. Don't forget your alignment sticks. 🐪⛳ And the limited edition GREY hoodies EGYPT TRIP (15th -19th Nov we'll be there) 🐪⛳ - https://www.golfbreaks.com/en-gb/holidays/cairo/hilton-pyramids-golf-resort/packages/7dc84fcf-8016-4e82-8207-cb000d42ddf0/ Email - [email protected] Discord Tik Tok Youtube Merch Tour IGOLF Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices | 36m 51s | ||||||
| 8/23/26 | Tom Cruise Landed On Our Golf Course | Alright Par Pals TP has been booked in for a 6:46am tee time at and it's sparked a proper debate: when is an early tee time actually TOO early? We've also got the new Ping iDi driving irons on their way to us, and TG explains exactly why he needs one. He shot an 83 while topping it off the tee six times, so if he can just find a club he trusts off the tee, he reckons there's a 77 in there. Plus: TP has seen Tom Cruise land a helicopter at Richmond Golf Club (a brand new anecdote, somehow never told before 🚁), why driving through a golf course to reach the clubhouse is one of life's great pleasures, and the Belfry trip where he's going all that way and NOT playing the Brabazon. 😩 And in the penultimate Toast or Roast with our friends at England Golf, Ashley finally breaks 100 but only by getting away from his home course entirely. And the limited edition GREY hoodies are on the website now. 🧥 EGYPT TRIP (15th -19th Nov we'll be there) 🐪⛳ - https://www.golfbreaks.com/en-gb/holidays/cairo/hilton-pyramids-golf-resort/packages/7dc84fcf-8016-4e82-8207-cb000d42ddf0/ Email - [email protected] Discord Tik Tok Youtube Merch Tour IGOLF Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices | 35m 22s | ||||||
| 8/19/26 | Jon Rahm Is Back... So What Happens To LIV Now? 👀 | Alright Par Pals 👋 Jon Rahm is heading back to the PGA Tour, and we get into what it actually means: the reported fine, the Ryder Cup implications, whether Tyrrell Hatton follows him, and what's left of LIV if the purses can't stay where they were. Plus the question still hanging over all of it, what on earth does Bryson do now? 👀 Elsewhere, Tom Green is finally back online (proper internet, no more Aggie poses 🙏) and TP took three golf clubs to the south of France, played zero golf in 38 degree heat, and brought them all home again. Painful. In the email corner, James hits the greatest drive of his life in front of an admiring gallery and the ball simply vanishes off a bone dry fairway 😩, Lee's shot at a club majors hat-trick comes down to four cruel shots, and an 80-year-old man in Pembrokeshire pulls a 50-year-old photograph out of his wallet that stops everyone in their tracks. ⛳ the limited edition GREY hoodies EGYPT TRIP (15th -19th Nov we'll be there) 🐪⛳ - https://www.golfbreaks.com/en-gb/holidays/cairo/hilton-pyramids-golf-resort/packages/7dc84fcf-8016-4e82-8207-cb000d42ddf0/ Email - [email protected] Discord Tik Tok Youtube Merch Tour IGOLF Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices | 36m 58s | ||||||
| 8/16/26 | The Best Thing You Can Buy In Golf Right Now 👀 | Alright Par Pals 👋 Big monologue energy from TG this week as he asks whether the handicap system, brilliant as it is for competitive golf, is actually getting in the way of us enjoying the sport we love. He shot 86 and then 89 over the weekend and didn't care one bit, and reckons that's the whole point. Discuss. 🤔 We also rave (completely unpaid, promise) about the Shot Scope LM1 launch monitor and why it might be the best £199 you'll spend on your golf, get to grips with smash factor, and TP relives a genuinely traumatic 10 hour ordeal at the Channel Tunnel. 🚗😩 Plus, golf's growing water problem after Greenpeace came for us, TG's trip to The Belfry this weekend (come say hi!) and a textbook Toast or Roast with our friends at England Golf, from Christopher, who cut down to nine clubs, ignored his score completely and finally broke 100. ⛳ Oh, and the limited edition GREY hoodies are on the website now. 🧥 EGYPT TRIP (15th -19th Nov we'll be there) 🐪⛳ - https://www.golfbreaks.com/en-gb/holidays/cairo/hilton-pyramids-golf-resort/packages/7dc84fcf-8016-4e82-8207-cb000d42ddf0/ Email - [email protected] Discord Tik Tok Youtube Merch Tour IGOLF Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices | 36m 09s | ||||||
| 8/13/26 | SUSAN CALMAN | She's Been Lying To Her Wife About Golf... And She's In The Room 😳 #TalkBirdieToMe | WE'RE BACK with a new episode of the Talk Birdie To Me Series and this week we're joined by comedian, broadcaster and full-blown golf obsessive, Susan Calman. 30 minutes of chat about picking golf back up at 50 after a 37 year break, going from a 34 handicap to 17 in under a year, and why golf is the only thing in her life she can actually measure. ⛳ We also find out why she'll only ever play a yellow ball, the incredibly emotional reason she wears her dad's hat on the course, and the ongoing (very awkward) confession about exactly how much all those clubs cost. Her wife was in the room for the whole thing. 😬 Plus, why Shiskine on the Isle of Arran is the greatest golf course in the world, and her DREAM four ball. 👀 MASSIVE thanks to our friends at GOLF NOW for helping make this series happen and bringing it to the masses. Check out all the amazing deals on their site below and remember use code GIRML10 on the app to get an extra 10% off HOT DEALS https://www.golfnow.co.uk You can also take the Golf Now quiz to find out the exact GOLFER you are below - https://cloud.marketing.golfnow.co.uk/quiz Make sure you hit that subscribe button as we’ll be back every other Friday for another episode of Talk Birdie To Me! - New episode of GIRML... Monday, Thursday and Friday (fortnightly) Email - [email protected] Discord Tik Tok Youtube Merch Tour IGOLF Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices | 34m 59s | ||||||
| 8/12/26 | I PLAYED IN A PRO-AM 🤯 + Gary Player Blanked Me | We're back from a couple of weeks off (and broadcasting from a brand new house with no internet, filmed on a phone, so apologies in advance 😅). TG got to play the pro-am at Centurion and came back with the stories to prove it. He was paired with Shannon Tan, who'd finished sixth at the Open four days earlier. We also get into the format that made the whole day , you'll want to steal this for your next golf trip. Plus, the story of Gary Player watching every single tee shot on 18, complimenting everyone, and then saying absolutely nothing when TG striped the best drive of his life. 😤 In the email corner, an American listener introduces us to Noel Fielding's cousin, a man proposes for his wife's hand on the 10th tee, and we give our best advice for finding your swing (and your confidence) again. ⛳ Email - [email protected] Discord Tik Tok Youtube Merch Tour IGOLF Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices | 30m 55s | ||||||
| 8/9/26 | Is Golf Ending My Life? | Alright Par Pals An emotional one this week as it's the FINAL episode from the beloved shed studio (TG is quite literally dismantling it live as we record 😢). We get into whether golf is actually good OR bad for your health, the glorious/terrible world of halfway house food (doner kebabs at the turn, anyone?) and TP's cholesterol-vs-sausage-roll dilemma. We also work out the best things to buy at the Open shop, share the sneaky (and definitely-not-legal) hack for getting your golf clubs on a plane, and read a Toast or Roast so lovely it nearly set us both off . Oh, and an email forces us to completely redefine what "noshing off" means. You'll have to listen for that one. Email - [email protected] Discord Tik Tok Youtube Merch Tour IGOLF Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices | 35m 13s | ||||||
| 8/5/26 | Is It EVER Okay To Be A Bandit? | Alright Par Pals 👋 A sponsor-free, brought-to-you-by-YOU email corner this week, and it's a good one. We debate whether there's ever a circumstance where it's genuinely okay to be a bandit (Liam from Germany might just have found it), and marvel at the world's longest seven wood, a 250 yard freak shot across a cobblestone bridge that started a full-blown junior vs grumpy members war. 😤 We also get into the tragedy of the hole-in-one nobody can ever know about (anonymous snuck off work, and it might just be the darkest golf fear of all), our favourite non-instruction golf books, and an ongoing existential crisis about whether we've read these emails before. Plus, the Egypt work trip is happening in November and it turns out some of you are actually coming. The Link is here if you fancy it. (15th -19th Nov we'll be there) 🐪⛳ - https://www.golfbreaks.com/en-gb/holidays/cairo/hilton-pyramids-golf-resort/packages/7dc84fcf-8016-4e82-8207-cb000d42ddf0/ Email - [email protected] Discord Tik Tok Youtube Merch Tour IGOLF Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices | 34m 47s | ||||||
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| 8/2/26 | The Great Net Handicap Scandal | Alright Par Pals 👋 Big topics this week. We're on a mission to convince you that a 300 yard drive is worthless because a good SCORE is the only thing that actually sticks with you. We also finally get to the bottom of artisan golf , make the case for a proper UK & Ireland links swing after Birkdale, and TG tells the story of the mate who asked for advice and then flatly refused to take it. Also with our friends at England Golf, Ben serves up a genuinely tragic Toast or Roast. All this and more coming up on this week’s episode of Golf Is Ruining My Life. See you Thursday! Tom’s 👊 Email - [email protected] Discord Tik Tok Youtube Merch Tour IGOLF Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices | 35m 13s | ||||||
| 7/31/26 | GORDON SMART | The Most Nerve-Shredding Tee Shot In Golf History 😳 #TalkBirdieToMe | WE'RE BACK with a new episode of Talk Birdie To Me This week we're joined by broadcaster and proud Scotsman, Gordon Smart. 30 minutes of chat about learning to grip a club with his grandad, the perfect golf handicap (spoiler: he agrees with us) and quite possibly the most horrendous first tee experience ever told on this show, hungover at Sunningdale, following Geoff Hurst, Jimmy Tarbuck and Lee Sharpe. 😳 We also hear how golf got him through losing his voice and his job in lockdown, playing the Old Course in reverse (something Tiger's never done), his run-in with Sean Connery at a urinal 🍺 and his DREAM four ball. 👀 Gordon's Article - https://soundergolf.com/blogs/journal/silence-in-a-special-place MASSIVE thanks to our friends at GOLF NOW for helping make this series happen and bringing it to the masses. Check out all the amazing deals on their site below and remember use code GIRML10 on the app to get an extra 10% off HOT DEALS https://www.golfnow.co.uk You can also take the Golf Now quiz to find out the exact GOLFER you are below - https://cloud.marketing.golfnow.co.uk/quiz Make sure you hit that subscribe button as we’ll be back every other Friday for another episode of Talk Birdie To Me! - New episode of GIRML... Monday, Thursday and Friday (fortnightly) Email - [email protected] Discord Tik Tok Youtube Merch Tour IGOLF Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices | 39m 10s | ||||||
| 7/29/26 | The Perfect Handicap Revealed | BOOK YOUR NEXT GOLFBREAKS TRIP MY CLICKING HERE Alright Par Pals 👋 TG is in a full non-golfing slump (moving house means the beloved shed studio is being retired 😢) but that won't stop us solving one of golf's great debates once and for all: what is the PERFECT golf handicap? We also get into why being fitted by someone who ISN'T incentivised to upsell you is a total game-changer, and how long it takes for the hope to reignite after a truly disastrous round It's also the FINAL email corner before we pick our winner for Egypt 🐪, and we finish on possibly the greatest holiday golf email ever. Thanks to our friends at GolfBreaks for hooking us up with an amazing prize, remember the best email of the summer will be joining us for 4 nights at Hilton Pyramids Golf Resort, In Egypt with 3 rounds of golf (1x Dreamland GC, 1x The Allegria GC, 1x New Giza GC). COME TO EGYPY WITH US (WE'LL BE THERE 15-19 NOV 2026) New episode of GIRML... Monday, Thursday and Friday (fortnightly) Email - [email protected] Discord Tik Tok Youtube Merch Tour IGOLF Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices | 35m 02s | ||||||
| 7/26/26 | The Golf Story That Could Get Us SUED | Alright Par Pals 👋 Buckle up, because this week TG tells a story so scandalous it could get us sued. For legal reasons, none of it happened to anyone we know it happened to a man called Tommy Greenfield, from Ireland, who mows fields until 1pm. Any resemblance to persons living or dead is entirely coincidental. We also get into the shyness of the new golfer, the various times we've had to walk off a course early (Celtic Manor, RIP), and TP relives his club championship meltdown. We’ve also got another Toast or Roast with our friends at England Golf, where Jack takes us through possibly the most heartbreaking scorecard in podcast history. All this and more coming up on this week’s episode of Golf Is Ruining My Life. See you Thursday! Tom’s 👊 Email - [email protected] Discord Tik Tok Youtube Merch Tour IGOLF Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices | 37m 05s | ||||||
| 7/22/26 | Phantom ARM Johnnies | BOOK YOUR NEXT GOLFBREAKS TRIP MY CLICKING HERE Alright Par Pals 👋 TP has turned up sporting a full facial midlife crisis. His hairdresser left the moustache on, his wife hasn't replied to the text and we can't stop talking about it. Genuinely one for the Spotify/YouTube crowd this week. 🥸 We also get deep into arm Johnnies (UV protection, very sexy), the correct sock length for golf shorts (a masterclass, honestly) and the ongoing dream of a GIRML golf day with Stella on draft. In the email corner with our friends at Golf Breaks we've got possibly the most X-rated email we've ever received 😳 Only ONE more email corner left before we pick our winner for Egypt. Get them in. ⛳ Thanks to our friends at GolfBreaks for hooking us up with an amazing prize, remember the best email of the summer will be joining us for 4 nights at Hilton Pyramids Golf Resort, In Egypt with 3 rounds of golf (1x Dreamland GC, 1x The Allegria GC, 1x New Giza GC). New episode of GIRML... Monday, Thursday and Friday (fortnightly) Email - [email protected] Discord Tik Tok Youtube Merch Tour IGOLF Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices | 37m 29s | ||||||
| 7/20/26 | Ryan FoxThe Open+4 | — | — | — | Ryan FoxThe Open+5 | Golf Now | 23m 56s | ||
| 7/20/26 | golfBryson DeChambeau+4 | — | — | — | Bryson DeChambeauRory McIlroy+5 | Golf Breaks | 34m 47s | ||
| 7/17/26 | golfcomedy+4 | — | — | — | golfAlex Horne+5 | GOLF NOWGIRML10 | 34m 38s | ||
| 7/16/26 | golflive event+4 | — | — | — | golfOpen Championship+7 | — | 32m 13s | ||
| 7/14/26 | greenkeepinggolf courses+3 | — | — | — | greenkeepinggolf+3 | Glen Moray Single Malt Whisky | 35m 29s | ||
| 7/13/26 | handicapgolf+4 | — | — | — | handicapgolf+5 | — | 34m 12s | ||
| 7/10/26 | greenkeepinggolf courses+3 | — | — | — | greenskeepergolf+3 | Glen Moray Single Malt Whisky | 34m 10s | ||
| 7/8/26 | golfhumor+3 | — | — | — | golftrolley+3 | GolfBreaks | 36m 49s | ||
| 7/5/26 | golfpersonal reflection+4 | — | — | — | golfwedge+7 | — | 36m 02s | ||
| 7/2/26 | playing with Tiger Woodslife on tour+3 | — | — | — | Tiger Woodsgolf+3 | GOLF NOWGIRML10 | 29m 02s | ||
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