It‘s Probably (not) Aliens!

David Jacobs spent his retirement from teaching history at Temple University convinced that alien-human hybrids he calls hubrids are quietly moving into apartments in Philadelphia, taking jobs, and waiting for a signal to enslave the planet. The catch is that these telepathic interstellar conquerors apparently cannot work a toaster, order a coffee, or figure out when to clap at a concert, so they abduct people to teach them. Tristan is joined by Mildred from Thought Slime, back for a record number of guest spots while Scott is on baby duty, to walk through how Jacobs assembled an entire alien class system of robed mantises, drone grays, and prototype hybrids out of nothing but hypnosis sessions, a lot of them done over the phone.Then it stops being funny. We get into how hypnotic regression manufactures memories that feel more real than the real ones, the documented case of the woman Jacobs put through 91 sessions and the harm he caused her, and why the History Channel keeps handing this guy a microphone (the answer is ad money, mostly). Underneath the goofy lore is great replacement rhetoric with the labels swapped out: a hidden enemy that looks like you but isn't, a coming loss of everything you are, and a man selling himself as the only one who can save you. Same story Europe told about changelings centuries ago, now with a UFO strapped to it. We land somewhere more hopeful, on why actually knowing the people around you is the thing that breaks the spell.Guest Plug:Mildred from Thought Slime makes left-wing comedy and video essays on YouTube at youtube.com/@thoughtslime. Mildred is also, for the record, the current title-holder for most IPNA guest appearances.Get new episodes early and support the show on Patreon and Nebula!Subscribe to It's Probably (not) Aliens for weekly episodes about cool ancient history! And give us a 5-star review if you have the time. It really helps us out!Tristan Johnson Bluesky | Twitter | YouTubeScott Niswander Bluesky | Twitter | YouTubeFollow the show on Bluesky or Twitter for more updates!Ask us questions and send us topics to talk about at ProbsNotAliens.comMusic by Rod Kim | Cover art by Skutch | Edited by MaxSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Harvard Professor Avi Loeb is back, and he wants you to believe that the new interstellar object screaming through our solar system, 3I/Atlas, is a hostile alien spacecraft sent to destroy us. In this episode, Tristan and Scott (who is currently possessed by Professor X) break down why this claim is "objectively wrong" and why the reality, a 14-billion-year-old "Universe Placenta" from the dawn of time, is infinitely cooler than the sci-fi grift. We discuss the "thick disc" of the galaxy, why scientific pre-prints are a media hacker's best friend, and whether the X-Men actually have a space program.Get new episodes early and support the show on Patreon and Nebula!Subscribe to It's Probably (not) Aliens for weekly episodes about cool ancient history! And give us a 5-star review if you have the time. It really helps us out!Tristan Johnson Bluesky | Twitter | YouTubeScott Niswander Bluesky | Twitter | YouTubeFollow the show on Bluesky or Twitter for more updates!Ask us questions and send us topics to talk about at ProbsNotAliens.comMusic by Rod Kim | Cover art by SkutchSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

We’re kicking off the new season by doing the one thing Ancient Aliens refuses to do: admitting we were wrong.First, Scott has entered his "Napalm Era" and held the podcast hostage to talk about the 2025 animated masterpiece K-Pop: Demon Hunters (and the specific lyrics that have rewired his brain). Once we get that out of our system, we open the mailbag to face the music.We issue mea culpas for mixing up our Star Trek treaties (Khitomer vs. Algeron is serious business), failing to understand how mirrors and thermodynamics work, and forgetting that lighthouses are actually very pretty. We also revisit Lord of the Flies to discuss why William Golding might have just been sick of dealing with British private school boys, and clarify that Spider-Man (Supaidāman) gave us giant robots, but he didn't invent them.Finally, we tackle a listener email that sends us down a rabbit hole regarding the philosophical roots of fascism. Tristan explains how the transition from Enlightenment empiricism to Romanticism's "triumph of the will" explains everything from the Flat Earth movement to the modern political divide.Get new episodes early and support the show on Patreon and Nebula!Subscribe to It's Probably (not) Aliens for weekly episodes about cool ancient history! And give us a 5-star review if you have the time. It really helps us out!Tristan Johnson Bluesky | Twitter | YouTubeScott Niswander Bluesky | Twitter | YouTubeFollow the show on Bluesky or Twitter for more updates!Ask us questions and send us topics to talk about at ProbsNotAliens.comMusic by Rod Kim | Cover art by SkutchSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Ancient Aliens loves to portray angels not as divine messengers, but as heavenly soldiers armed with advanced weaponry, turning biblical stories into "battle reports" of alien soldiers. But this isn't just a weird sci-fi twist; it taps into a much older, darker tradition. We trace the long, strange history of how Christianity, a religion born from oppressed people, was transformed into a tool for imperial conquest. It's a journey that starts with a Roman emperor seeing a cross in the sky and hearing the words "by this sign, conquer," leads directly to the Crusades, and helps justify centuries of colonization. Finally, we explore how this ancient ideology of holy war echoes in the chants of the modern far-right and gets a secular facelift in the pseudo-history of warrior aliens. Stuff mentioned in the episode:Tom Lehrer"Wernher von Braun" song by Tom LehrerThe Bible, Annotated Beyond All Possible Usefulness by Zach WeinersmithEmperor ConstantineBattle of the Milvian BridgeChi-Rho symbolCouncil of ClermontPope Urban II's call for the First CrusadeDum Diversus (1452)Doctrine of DiscoveryLiberation TheologyThe Art of Not Being Governed by James C. ScottJosé's video on Tucker Carlson and UFO documentariesGet new episodes early and support the show on Patreon and Nebula!Subscribe to It's Probably (not) Aliens for weekly episodes about cool ancient history! And give us a 5-star review if you have the time. It really helps us out!Tristan Johnson Bluesky | Twitter | YouTubeScott Niswander Bluesky | Twitter | YouTubeFollow the show on Bluesky or Twitter for more updates!Ask us questions and send us topics to talk about at ProbsNotAliens.comMusic by Rod Kim | Cover art by SkutchSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Ancient Aliens claims that myths about divine "Watchers" from the Anunnaki to the Eye of Horus are actually cultural memories of extraterrestrial surveillance systems. But what if the truth is far more terrestrial and much more insidious? Tristan argues that these stories aren't about alien technology, but a very human one: the invention of divine surveillance as a tool for social control. Join us as we unpack the 5,000-year-old con of the panopticon, a psychological prison designed to make you regulate your own behaviour. From Mesopotamian statues watching over grain silos to Jeremy Bentham's famously preserved head, they explore how ancient priests perfected a system of control so effective that modern governments and tech companies basically just copied it. So the next time you feel a pang of anxiety about that little green light on your laptop, thank an ancient priest for programming your brain to accept it. Oh, and they also redesign Catholicism to include nachos and Buzz Balls. Stuff mentioned in the episode:Get new episodes early and support the show on Patreon and Nebula!Jeremy Bentham's Auto-icon at UCLCaitlin Doughty's YouTube channel, Ask a MorticianDavid GraeberPeter KropotkinElf on the ShelfThe PanopticonThe Benjamin Franklin EffectSystem 1 & System 2 ThinkingDimension 20Debt: The First 5,000 YearsThe Conquest of BreadHome AssistantPi-holeSignalThe ACLUThe CCLAM&M Food Market"Shaming the Meat"Subscribe to It's Probably (not) Aliens for weekly episodes about cool ancient history! And give us a 5-star review if you have the time. It really helps us out!Tristan Johnson Bluesky | Twitter | YouTubeScott Niswander Bluesky | Twitter | YouTubeFollow the show on Bluesky or Twitter for more updates!Ask us questions and send us topics to talk about at ProbsNotAliens.comMusic by Rod Kim | Cover art by SkutchSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

In April 2025, the James Webb Space Telescope made a groundbreaking discovery: a distant exoplanet, K2-18b, showed signs of dimethyl sulphide. A chemical that, on Earth, is only produced by life. The media went wild with the news that we had finally found a "fart planet," the first real biosignature of alien life. But then, as quickly as it appeared, the confidence began to fade.Join Tristan and Scott as they investigate what really happened with the planet of alien farts. First, they dive into the incredible science of how we study distant worlds, from the mind-bending coolness of transit spectroscopy to the statistical nitty-gritty of "three sigma" confidence. Then, they pull back the curtain on the systemic pressures that create these cycles of hype and retraction, exploring everything from the "publish or perish" culture in academia to the perverse incentives that cause university press offices to overstate research. This isn't just a story about a potential discovery; it's a crucial lesson in scientific literacy and a look at how the messy, brilliant, and deeply human process of science actually works.Stuff mentioned in the episode:K2-18bJames Webb Space Telescope (JWST)Cambridge University's original press release about the discoveryDimethyl sulfideThe MIRI (Mid-Infrared Instrument) on JWSTTransit spectroscopyThe COLd Scale (Confidence of Life Detection scale) from NASAPhosphine on Venus controversy'OumuamuaALH84001 (Martian meteorite)The Wow! SignalDrake EquationPathological scienceAndrew Wakefield vaccine studyPolywaterCold fusionN-rays (1903)Science communication outlets mentioned: The Conversation, Science X, Tech Explore, Medical Xpress, Phys.orgSodium vapor process (Mary Poppins special effects)Get new episodes early and support the show on Patreon and Nebula!Subscribe to It's Probably (not) Aliens for weekly episodes about cool ancient history! And give us a 5-star review if you have the time. It really helps us out!Tristan Johnson Bluesky | Twitter | YouTubeScott Niswander Bluesky | Twitter | YouTubeFollow the show on Bluesky or Twitter for more updates!Ask us questions and send us topics to talk about at ProbsNotAliens.comMusic by Rod Kim | Cover art by SkutchSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.