Kids These Days

Guest: Dr. Stephanie Bono, licensed psychologist and founder of Evergrow Therapy & Assessment in the Denver Highlands. Steph specializes in ADHD, anxiety, insomnia, and parenting, and leads workshops for moms raising toddler boys — including her new boy mom playgroup at Sloane's Lake in Denver.Episode Summary: Dr. Courtney sits down with Denver psychologist and boy mom Dr. Stephanie Bono for a warm, research-packed conversation about what it really takes to raise emotionally healthy boys. From the sharks on their onesies to the way we respond when they cry, Steph breaks down the subtle — and not so subtle — ways we start putting boys in a box long before they can walk. This one is for every parent who wants to raise a son who grows into a man capable of close relationships, emotional awareness, and a full, rich life.What You'll Learn in This Episode:How gender bias shows up in parenting before your baby is even bornThe clothing and toy research that will change how you look at your kid's closetWhy boys are actually deeply relational by nature — and what starts to weed that out of themThe difference between explicit and implicit gender messaging, and which one is harder to catchHow to talk to your son about his emotions without shutting them downWhat to do when your kid comes home saying something that makes you want to flip a tableThe long-term consequences of hyper-masculinity — and why the research is more alarming than most parents realizeThe manosphere, the incel movement, and how a secure home attachment is your best protectionThe one question Steph asks herself every time Miles criesResources & Links:Dr. Stephanie Bono: evergrowledenver.comBoy Mom Toddler Playgroup at Sloane's Lake — details on Dr. Steph's websiteHow to Raise a Boy by Michael Reichert, PhDIntegrated Behavioral Health: integratedbhs.comFollow Dr. Steph: @evergrowpsychologyFollow IBH: @integratedbhLegal Disclaimer: While this podcast may provide information that is educational in nature, it is not intended to be a health care service, psychotherapy, or the practice of psychology. This podcast’s main purpose is to provide educational insights for all stages of child and family development. We will not provide diagnoses or specific recommendations for your family. At no point is a therapeutic relationship established by way of your unilateral participation by listening to these episodes, and we cannot provide advice or privileges associated with a therapeutic relationship. We recommend that anyone who is seeking a therapeutic relationship reach out to Integrated Behavioral Health at info@integratedbhs.com to begin the interview process of becoming a client or receiving a referral. If at any point in your listening or engaging with the content of this podcast, you experience an emergency, please immediately call 911 or go to your local emergency room.

“I’m stupid.” “I’m going to fail.” “If I don't get an A, I'll never get into college.”As parents, hearing our children engage in negative self-talk can trigger our own "Internal Critic." We feel the urgency to fix it, to argue against it, or to problem-solve the pain away. But what if our "fix-it" mode is actually closing the door on connection?In this episode of Kids These Days, Dr. Courtney sits down with Dr. Kathleen Diaz to define what negative self-talk actually is—and why "unhelpful self-talk" might be a more effective term. We dive deep into the experience of the inner critic, exploring why children and teens ruminate and how their behaviors—like defiance or withdrawal—are often communicating the disappointment they can't yet put into words.In this episode, we discuss:The Problem-Solving Trap: Why "normalizing" or "investigating" a child’s failure can accidentally lead to invalidation.Behavior as Communication: How to spot the inner critic in teens who aren't speaking their thoughts out loud.The Parent’s Internal U-Turn: What to do when your child’s struggle triggers your own fears of not being a "good enough" parent.The Power of Repair: How to move back into your "Smart Brain" (Prefrontal Cortex) and fix a conversation when you’ve reacted from a place of fear or dysregulation.Precision over Frequency: How to communicate expectations in a way that builds a "Secure Base" rather than a "Manager" dynamic.Whether you are navigating an elementary schooler’s math meltdowns or a teen’s high-stakes anxiety, this episode provides a roadmap for moving from "investigator" to "vessel of support" through curiosity and radical accountability.About Our Guest: Dr. Kathleen Diaz is a licensed therapist specializing in child and adolescent mental health, focusing on evidence-based strategies to help families navigate emotional regulation and the complex inner dialogue of the modern student.Links & Resources:Newsletter: Sign up for the Kids These Days Newsletter for monthly parenting tips and practice resources.Podcast Library: Catch up on previous episodes of Kids These Days.Instagram: Follow @integratedbh for daily reflections and the messy middle of parenting.Website: Learn more about our specialized evaluations and therapy services at www.integratedbhs.com.Dr. Kathleen's BioLegal Disclaimer: While this podcast may provide information that is educational in nature, it is not intended to be a health care service, psychotherapy, or the practice of psychology. This podcast’s main purpose is to provide educational insights for all stages of child and family development. We will not provide diagnoses or specific recommendations for your family. At no point is a therapeutic relationship established by way of your unilateral participation by listening to these episodes, and we cannot provide advice or privileges associated with a therapeutic relationship. We recommend that anyone who is seeking a therapeutic relationship reach out to Integrated Behavioral Health at info@integratedbhs.com to begin the interview process of becoming a client or receiving a referral. If at any point in your listening or engaging with the content of this podcast, you experience an emergency, please immediately call 911 or go to your local emergency room.

We hear the term "Self-Care" everywhere—usually accompanied by images of three-hour spa days or solo vacations. But for parents in the "messy middle," those things don't just feel rare—they feel impossible. When we can't achieve the Instagram version of self-care, we end up feeling two things: Guilt and Pressure.Today, Dr. Courtney is joined by Dr. Brittany Wade, a Licensed Psychologist and founder of Thrive Child Psychology. Together, they are stripping away the "luxury" label and reframing self-care as what it actually is: Nervous System Regulation. If you’ve ever felt like getting the dishes done was "self-care," or if you struggle to ask your partner for the rest you actually need, this episode is for you. We’re moving beyond the "to-do" list to help you build a Secure Base for yourself so you can be one for your children.In this episode, we discuss:The Self-Care Myth: Why we need to stop viewing self-care as an "extra" to be earned and start viewing it as a biological necessity for regulation.Productivity vs. Regulation: The hard truth that checking off your to-do list (like cleaning the baseboards or doing the dishes) is productivity, not self-care.The Self-Care Grief Process: Acknowledging and mourning the loss of the "old version" of yourself who had unlimited time for gym sessions and solo travel.Equal vs. Equitable Rest: Why a 50/50 split of chores doesn't account for who is the most "depleted," and how to negotiate for "Equitable Rest" with your partner.Modeling Regulation: Why the "Selfless Parent" narrative actually harms our children, and how modeling self-care provides them with a regulatory toolkit for life.Micro-Regulation: Small, 5-minute shifts you can build into your current schedule—from the "coffee in silence" to the "three breaths in the driver's seat."Episode Timestamps:[03:29] – Redefining Self-Care: Why it’s not a luxury, it’s regulation.[05:53] – The "Guilt and Pressure" cycle: Why self-care often feels like another chore.[08:37] – Self-Care vs. Leisure: Understanding the difference between a hot shower and a round of golf.[12:38] – The Modeling Aspect: Why your kids need to see you taking deep breaths.[14:26] – Practical Strategies: Exercise, family walks, and protecting 30 minutes.[15:50] – The Morning Reset: The clinical value of coffee in silence.[18:43] – Parenting Reframe: Why self-care doesn't always have to be done "alone."[21:55] – The Productivity Trap: Why the dishes are not self-care.[24:51] – Equal vs. Equitable: Navigating depletion levels with your partner.[28:06] – The Grief of Parenthood: Mourning your pre-kid autonomy.[30:58] – Closing Thought: Why self-care makes you a better parent, partner, and person.Resources & Connect with Us:Work with Dr. Brittany Wade: Visit Thrive Child Psychology for specialized support in Illinois and Florida.Identify Your Parenting Values: Grief often clarifies what matters most. Download our Free Values Workbook here.The Co-Parenting U-Turn Workbook: Use this to communicate your needs for rest to your partner without the "Stomp and Slam." Available here.Book a Consultation: If you are feeling chronically burnt out and ready for specialized support, book a complimentary 15-minute phone consultation with our team at Integrated Behavioral Health.Instagram: Join our community for "Inside-Out" insights @integratedbh.Keywords: Parent Self-Care, Nervous System Regulation, Parent Burnout, Dr. Brittany Wade, Dr. Courtney Lynn, Kids These Days Podcast, Attachment Theory, Secure Base, Motherhood Guilt, Equitable Rest.Remember: You don’t have to be perfect to be a great parent. We are all learning how to raise kids these days.Legal Disclaimer: While this podcast may provide information that is educational in nature, it is not intended to be a health care service, psychotherapy, or the practice of psychology. This podcast’s main purpose is to provide educational insights for all stages of child and family development. We will not provide diagnoses or specific recommendations for your family. At no point is a therapeutic relationship established by way of your unilateral participation by listening to these episodes, and we cannot provide advice or privileges associated with a therapeutic relationship. We recommend that anyone who is seeking a therapeutic relationship reach out to Integrated Behavioral Health at info@integratedbhs.com to begin the interview process of becoming a client or receiving a referral. If at any point in your listening or engaging with the content of this podcast, you experience an emergency, please immediately call 911 or go to your local emergency room.

But my child can play video games for eight hours straight—they can't possibly have ADHD." If you’ve ever said those words, this episode is for you. We often think of ADHD as a deficit of attention, but in reality, it’s a struggle with Executive Functioning—the brain’s internal management system.Today, Dr. Courtney is joined by Dr. Stephanie Fox, a clinical psychologist and expert in neurodevelopmental assessments. Dr. Fox brings a unique perspective to the table: she is both a specialist who evaluates ADHD and an "ADHDer" herself, diagnosed in adulthood.Together, they cut through the noise to discuss why ADHD is often missed in girls, how "hyperfocus" is actually a clinical sign of the diagnosis, and why a comprehensive evaluation is a "gift" of self-compassion for your child. If you’re ready to move beyond the labels and understand your child’s brain from the Inside-Out, tune in.In this episode, we discuss:The Focus Myth: Why the ability to hyperfocus on video games, reading, or scrapbooking actually points toward an ADHD diagnosis, not away from it.The Brain's "CEO": A deep dive into Executive Functioning—the management tools we use for task initiation, working memory, and time management.The "Silent" Presentation in Girls: How socialization and perfectionism lead to girls suffering in silence or being misdiagnosed with "just anxiety."Twice Exceptional (2e): The intersection of high IQ and ADHD, and why "good grades" don't mean a child isn't struggling.The "Gift" of Assessment: Why an evaluation isn't about a label, but about providing a "user manual" for your child’s brain to foster self-compassion.Finding the "Jam": How neurodivergent individuals find success by aligning their unique strengths with the right career and environment.About Our Guest: Dr. Stephanie Fox is the founding psychologist at Four Corner Psychological Services. She specializes in comprehensive evaluations for ADHD, Autism, and learning disabilities. Her work is dedicated to helping individuals and families understand their neurobiology to move from shame to empowerment.Resources & Connect with Us:Four Corners Psychological Services: You can find Dr. Fox's practice here.Integrated Behavioral Health Newsletter: Get expert tips, practical tools, and encouragement straight to your inbox—designed for parents who want guidance, reassurance, and fresh ideas for raising resilient kids. Sign up here.Book a Consultation: If you suspect ADHD or neurodiversity is playing a role in your family's dynamic, book a complimentary 15-minute phone consultation with our team at Integrated Behavioral Health.Instagram: Join our community @integratedbh.Keywords: ADHD myths, Executive Functioning, ADHD in girls, Neurodiversity, Twice Exceptional, 2e, Child Assessment, Dr. Stephanie Fox, Dr. Courtney Lynn, Kids These Days.Remember: You don’t have to be perfect to be a great parent. We are all learning how to raise kids these days.Legal Disclaimer: While this podcast may provide information that is educational in nature, it is not intended to be a health care service, psychotherapy, or the practice of psychology. This podcast’s main purpose is to provide educational insights for all stages of child and family development. We will not provide diagnoses or specific recommendations for your family. At no point is a therapeutic relationship established by way of your unilateral participation by listening to these episodes, and we cannot provide advice or privileges associated with a therapeutic relationship. We recommend that anyone who is seeking a therapeutic relationship reach out to Integrated Behavioral Health at info@integratedbhs.com to begin the interview process of becoming a client or receiving a referral. If at any point in your listening or engaging with the content of this podcast, you experience an emergency, please immediately call 911 or go to your local emergency room.