87. There's no such thing as mental load
From Mothering Ourselves Mindfully by Sarah Harmon
April 14, 2026 · 21 min · Season 1 · Episode 87
About this episode
In this episode, Sarah Harmon discusses the concept of mental load, arguing that it is a misnomer and exploring the deeper connections between our thoughts, emotions, and nervous system.
You've heard of the mental load — but what if we've been calling it the wrong thing all along? In this episode, I'm making the case that there's no such thing as just a mental load, and why getting the name right is the first step toward actually getting relief. I go deep into the brain-body load, the MOMsight framework, and why real change doesn't happen by shuffling tasks around — it happens in the body. Key Points Why "mental load" is a misnomer — and what the more accurate (and more useful) term actually is How our thoughts, emotions, and nervous system are inextricably linked — and why treating the load as purely cognitive leaves us without the right tools The difference between emotions and feelings — and why understanding this distinction is foundational to being a human who can flourish Why 90–95% of our experience (including the choices we make under load) is unconscious — and what that means for real change How the same event (a child's fever, a doctor's appointment) lands completely differently depending on what's happening in your nervous system Why conversations about mental load often spiral into frustration, blame, and resentment — and what to do with that instead…
People in this episode
Host: Sarah Harmon
Topics covered
- mental load
- brain-body load
- MOMsight framework
- emotions and feelings
- nervous system
- real change
Keywords
- mental load
- brain-body load
- MOMsight framework
- emotions
- nervous system
- real change
- task redistribution
- unconscious experience
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