No need for Prince Charming

Four and a Half Years Later — Alisha's Update A note: this episode mentions the loss of Alisha's son Jeremy, who was stillborn 12 years ago today. She shares it with gratitude and without distress — but as always on this podcast, take care of yourself first. When I recorded my first ever episode of No Need for Prince Charming, Lexi was almost two. She is now six and a half. A lot has changed. I've been meaning to do this update for a while, and today felt like the right day — because it's the 12th anniversary of losing my son Jeremy, and I'm launching something I've been building towards for a very long time. More on that below. But first, let me catch you up. In early 2022, I was working full time in corporate loyalty, Lexi was in full-time daycare, Melbourne was still in lockdown, and I was running the podcast from stolen hours after she went to bed. I knew something was brewing — I just didn't know yet what it was going to be. What followed was four and a half years I would not trade for anything. Quitting a job I loved that had become somewhere I hated. Nearly four years sober. An ADHD diagnosis that explained a lot. Writing My Perfect Family. Building courses. Three Bali trips. A book club. A Facebook group that's now 3,500 members. The Bump Membership, which is still the thing I'm most proud of. Speaking at the Sydney Opera House. Sitting on the ART review committee. A second podcast. And learning, in a book club of all places, that one of my friends used the same donor as me — and that Lexi has a little sister. Today, on Jeremy's anniversary, I'm launching the SMS Membership. It's for established solo mums by choice — women who have their child, who are in the thick of it, who want more than a Facebook group can offer. A real community. Real faces. Monthly expert sessions on things we actually need to talk about — mortgages, perimenopause, body safety, employment rights, identity after motherhood. Plus fortnightly Zoom connection calls, state-based groups for real-life playdates, and specialist chats for neurosparkly mums, double donor families, mums without their own mum, and more. I also want to say this: I wasn't 100% sure when I did this. I wasn't even 50% sure. But I didn't want to look back and regret not trying. And it worked on the second round of IVF, and Alexandra is the absolute best thing that has ever happened to me, and I am so, so glad. If you're on the fence — listen to this episode. And then take the next step. In this episode: Going back to work in 2022 — full-time corporate, lockdowns, my mum in hospital the week I returned, survival mode Starting the podcast and feeling something brewing underneath all of it Writing My Perfect Family and why I wanted to normalise the language of donor conception for other families' children, not just ours Fiji with Rhiannon — and realising I almost certainly have ADHD A bullying boss, a toxic work environment, and the day I resigned with my bonus and Lexi in tow Solo Mum Society was born, and so was the realisation that books don't pay your mortgage Going sober almost four years ago — and why having Lexi finally gave me a reason big enough to make it stick The ADHD diagnosis and medication in 2024 — and how running your own business with ADHD without corporate deadlines is a very specific kind of chaos The first Bali trip: 24 women, total strangers, everything in common The Facebook group growing to 3,500 members — and why I started it when the existing group didn't match the energy of the solo mums I knew The Considering, Expecting and Preparing courses — why I made them, what they cover, and what it feels like to watch nervous women become excited ones The Disney cruise — Cinderella holding our daughters' hands, and every dream I had coming true The book club conversation that revealed Lexi's donor-conceived sibling — before the baby was even born Lexi starting school: Father's Day, a classmate who said she was lying about no

Acupuncture for IVF & Fertility — What Solo Mums Need to Know | Dr Michelle Smith, Ova Acupuncture Most fertility specialists will tell you to try acupuncture. Very few of them explain why. This week I'm joined by Dr Michelle Smith — acupuncturist, Chinese herbal medicine practitioner, and director of Ova Acupuncture in Brisbane. Michelle specialises in fertility and women's health, has two clinics in Brisbane, and sees women from all over Australia, including many solo mums by choice. She's also, as of this recording, 13 weeks pregnant via IVF — her first transfer — doing this solo, and very happy to talk about all of it. This episode is Acupuncture 101 for anyone who has been told it might help, has no idea how or why, and wants to actually understand the mechanism rather than just taking someone's word for it. We cover everything — the science and the philosophy, what's actually happening when a needle goes in and why that matters for egg quality and implantation, the ideal timeline for starting treatment before an IVF cycle, what to do if you have PCOS, what's different for known donor home insemination, how acupuncture supports perimenopause, and what to look for when finding a practitioner near you. Michelle is also refreshingly honest about what acupuncture can and can't do, why the pre- and post-transfer appointment is not as essential as the industry often suggests, and why her first priority with most new patients is to get them off half the supplements they're on. If you've been on the fence about whether to add acupuncture to your IVF cycle — this episode will help you make that decision. Ova Acupuncture — Brisbane, two clinics, telehealth available for interstate patients. Visit ovaacupuncture.au Note: Michelle can also provide referrals to trusted colleagues around Australia for those not in Brisbane. In this episode: How Michelle came to specialise in fertility — her own PCOS diagnosis, five years of study, and why she says she has the best job in the world Why fertility specialists telling you to "get acupuncture to relax" undersells what it's actually doing The sympathetic versus parasympathetic nervous system — and why the goal of acupuncture is to move you out of fight-or-flight How acupuncture supports IVF: blood flow to the ovaries, follicle quality, immune regulation and implantation The whole-systems approach — why the 12 weeks of weekly sessions before your cycle matters more than a pre- and post-transfer appointment What to do if you haven't had 12 weeks — the alternative protocol for stim phase The post-transfer window — what acupuncture is doing during the two-week wait, and when it's worth coming in What Michelle looks for when reviewing solo mums' IVF histories — and the basic things she sees missed because "we assumed everything was fine" Diet and lifestyle for fertility: Mediterranean diet, blood sugar regulation, eating enough, and why ice baths are off the table Acupuncture for known donor home insemination — optimising ovulation, luteal phase support, and vaginal microbiome testing PCOS and fertility: irregular ovulation, AMH, OHSS risk, and how Chinese medicine treats the individual rather than the protocol Perimenopause and why this generation of women is experiencing it differently — and how acupuncture helps How to navigate acupuncture with a needle phobia or as a neurodivergent person How to find a qualified fertility acupuncturist near you — what to look for and what to ask Michelle's IVF journey: first transfer, 13 weeks pregnant, doing it solo, and what she'd tell anyone just starting out Key Takeaways Acupuncture does more than help you relax — it shifts the nervous system, directs blood flow to reproductive organs, and supports immune regulation for implantation The whole-systems approach means regular weekly sessions in the lead-up to your cycle are more valuable than a single pre/post-transfer appointment Ideally start acupu

Every donor-conceived child from an SMBC will ask it eventually. Mummy, why don't I have a daddy? Most of us lie awake at some point worrying about how to answer it. What words do we use? How much do we say? What if we get it wrong? This week I'm joined by Beth Sadowsky — solo mum by choice, life coach, and author of Choosing Rose, a children's picture book written specifically for SMBC families. Beth is based in Florida, USA, and her daughter Lily is 7. The book started as a letter Beth wrote to Lily while she was still pregnant — a way to prepare for the conversation she knew was coming — and it became a beautifully illustrated picture book that leans into the question rather than avoiding it. Choosing Rose isn't a biology lesson. It doesn't explain what sperm is or how IVF works. It's a story — warm enough for bedtime and honest enough to open a real conversation. The kind of book you can hand your child and read together, and the words come naturally because the story does the work. We talk about how the book came to be, what Lily thought when she first heard it read to her, how Beth handled the moment at school when Lily said I wish I had a daddy at a table full of dads, and why Beth believes the question isn't something to dread — it's one of the most beautiful opportunities we have as solo mums. This episode is for any solo mum who hasn't quite worked out how to start this conversation yet. Or who's been putting it off. Or who picked up the book and burst into tears before they even got to page three. You don't have to have it all figured out. You just have to begin. Choosing Rose is available on Amazon, including Amazon Australia. Search: Choosing Rose Beth Sadowsky. In this episode: What inspired Beth to write Choosing Rose — and why it started as a letter, not a book The gap in children's books for SMBC families — what exists, what doesn't, and why it matters Why Beth deliberately kept the book free of biological detail — and what that makes possible How Lily reacted when Beth first read it to her at age 2 — and what she thinks now at 7 The moment at a school event when Lily said "I wish I had a daddy" — and how Beth handled it without making it a big deal Why "I wish I had a daddy" almost never means what we think it means — and what to do instead of panicking The difference between the question being about absence vs. the question being about curiosity How to use Choosing Rose at school to help classmates and teachers understand your family Beth's advice for any solo mum who wants to write their own book — three things she'd tell anyone starting out Why Father's Day is actually a perfect moment to open this conversation Links Choosing Rose on Amazon Australia Beth on Instagram: @choosingmotherhoodbooks or @choosing.motherhood This episode is brought to you by City Fertility Exploring fertility treatment as a solo mum in Australia? City Fertility offers an exclusive 20% discount for No Need for Prince Charming listeners. Claim your discount here. You're Not Doing This Alone Solo Mum Society's Facebook group is full of women asking the exact questions you're too tired to Google at 3am. Join here.