Intimacy, Desire and the Conversations Couples Avoid

Intimacy, Desire and the Conversations Couples Avoid

From Really Good Conversations by Amy Faulkner

February 9, 2026 · 34 min · Season 1 · Episode 65

About this episode

Amy and Isiah discuss intimacy, desire, and the conversations couples often avoid in long-term relationships.

Summary In this episode, Amy is joined by Isiah McKimmie to talk about intimacy, desire and the conversations couples often avoid. They explore why desire changes over time, how comparison and unrealistic expectations create pressure, and why focusing on what gets in the way of connection can be more helpful than trying to "do more". Guest Isiah McKimmie is a clinical sexologist and relationship therapist who works with individuals and couples around intimacy, desire and connection. Overview With Valentine's Day approaching, this conversation looks beyond the romance and into the realities of long-term relationships; the conversations we avoid, the expectations we carry, and the quiet ways intimacy can start to feel harder over time. Isiah shares what couples most commonly come to therapy for, and why the issue they arrive with is often only part of the picture. Together, Amy and Isiah explore why sex and intimacy feel so emotionally loaded, how avoidance can slowly erode connection, and why comparison often creates unnecessary pressure. They also unpack how desire naturally fluctuates across a relationship, the role emotional and mental load play in intimacy, and why removing…

People in this episode

Host: Amy Faulkner

Guest: Isiah McKimmie

Topics covered

  • intimacy
  • desire
  • couples therapy
  • long-term relationships
  • communication
  • emotional connection

Keywords

  • intimacy
  • desire
  • couples therapy
  • communication
  • relationship expectations
  • emotional load

Mentioned in this episode

Organizations: Really Good Conversations

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