Relief from Grief

Chumi Friedman Director of HUG, a division of A Time for those who have experienced perinatal or infant loss · My sister-in-law had a stillborn. The one-year mark is coming up. Should I say something to her? · My brother lost an eleven-year-old son. But he was very special-needs. His bar mitzvah is coming up; they wouldn’t have made a real celebration anyway. Should I say something? · Does it make sense that my sist...

Hillel Fuld was preparing for Yom Kippur. Although he had heard the news about a terror attack in the neighborhood where his brother lived, he didn’t know that his brother was the victim. Because… well, these things only happen to other people. Except that sometimes they can happen to us. During this time, when our hearts are with our brothers in Eretz Yisrael, when we all need to work on our emunah and we wonder why the world hates us, Mr. Fuld reminds us that halachah b’yaduah she’Eisav son...

Mrs. Mindy Blumenfeld, LCSW Mrs. Mindy Blumenfeld is positive and upbeat. She is smiley, and she makes you smile. You would never know that she lost her youngest son Hillel to cancer. Although she has been profoundly impacted by her loss, she won’t let the pain bring her down into negativity. She started writing about Hillel as a means of finding comfort. But really, her journey with writing about her son began with the puppets she created when Hillel was first diagnosed at age six. Faced wi...

Mrs. Barbara Bensoussan Novelist and well-known contributor to frum publications The young mother checked in to the hospital to have a baby. Nothing out of the ordinary. But this time, nothing went as expected. Not many people die from childbirth today, but Mrs. Benssousan’s daughter Miriam did. When her birth experience went awry, the doctors worked all night, desperately trying to ensure a happy outcome. They saved the baby. But the mother remained in a coma for the next four months until s...

Rabbi Yitzchok Rubin Rav of Adas Aish Kodesh in Manchester England She was Rebbetzin Rubin, but she was known as Chaiky. She had a way with people. Everyone who knew her felt loved and embraced by her – because she loved life, and she loved the people in her life. Whether it was her congregants or the ladies from the exercise class she gave, they all felt how deeply she cared. Chaiky was a powerhouse of a person. She was always on the go, yet somehow had time for everyone. She was on th...

Mrs. Devorah Schendler, author of Compatible with Life Giving birth to a stillborn baby was so painful. Yet looking back, Mrs. Devorah Schendler saw how that experience strengthened her emunah muscle for the next great challenge – giving birth to a baby diagnosed with Trisomy-13, a syndrome that is incompatible with life. For seven-and-a-half weeks, the Schendlers threw themselves into taking care of their sick baby. At the same time, they had children at home who also needed their mommy; Mrs...

Mrs. Feige Steinmetz Mother of Dovi Steinmetz, who perished in the Meron tragedy Lag Ba’Omer taf shin peh aleph (2021) is seared into our collective Jewish memory. It was on that day that a stampede took place in Meron, resulting in death and injury for many people. At first it seemed that Dovi was safe. Then his parents were unsure. And then it was confirmed: Dovi had been killed in Meron. How does a mother handle such news? Mrs. Steinmetz was in shock. It made no se...

Mrs. Zissy Muller She woke up one night and heard heavy rain outside her window. In a state of panic, she called her father and asked, “Where are the shovels? It’s raining. My child is cold. We must go dig him out of his grave.” Meet Zissy Muller. No, she isn’t crazy. She is a mother who lost her child. When her beloved son died completely unexpectedly, she was thrust into a brand-new world of pain that was so intense, it felt as if she was being burned by a blazing flame. C...

Lessons from the Past Mrs. Chaya Ginzberg BYA Teacher Rivky, Mrs. Ginzberg’s daughter, was a young mother of four children when she was niftar. On this podcast, Mrs. Ginzberg shares how although each family member struggled with their pain in their own way, the family held onto each other for dear life. With acceptance and faith there were no family politics. The relationship with her son-in-law, grandchildren and her son-in-law’s new wife remained peaceful and respectful.&...

Rabbi Shmuel Kohn, Therapist and Founder of Shloimy’s Club When people go through a tough nisayon, it isn’t uncommon to feel angry at Hashem. A person might shut down or feel numb, and they may even feel unable to daven. This can cause a lot of inner turmoil. Where is my emunah? Do I not believe in Hashem? From the time we are young we are taught that everything that happens is from Hashem, so if I’m thinking this way, I must be a terrible person. Or not. You may just be a person who went thr...

Mrs. Leah Subar, AEDP Psychotherapist People are typically wired with a tendency toward hope and resilience. Even when a child grows up in an abusive home, the desire to repair the relationship with one’s parent is so strong. An adult child will often try and try to make it work before they realize it’s impossible to change someone else. With proper rabbinic guidance, the adult child might need to establish very strict boundaries with the parent or maybe even cut off ties. But every so ...

Rabbi Seltzer is a well-known speaker and author of 45 books, including the Zera Shimshon series and his latest bestseller, 90 Seconds. When Dovid Hamelech lost his son Avshalom, he screamed “B’ni” nine times with heartrending screams. Yitzchak Avinu was only comforted many years after losing his mother Sarah, when he brought Rivkah to her tent, and the tent returned to the way it had been when Sarah was alive. We learn about grief from the Torah. Rabbi Seltzer shares some of the Torah’...

Ask anyone who knows me from my growing-up days. Back then, they would have laughed at the prospect of me hosting a podcast. It just wasn’t my type. But here I am, doing just that – and I get regular calls in response. People tell me, “Thank you so much. I love your podcast. I am finding it so helpful.” I feel gratified that Hashem has given me the opportunity to do this. Loss is so painful, and if I can help even a small fraction of those in pain, then I am grateful. Never would I have...