Sex, Here & Now

Why do people spend so much time worrying about everyone else's sex life? In this episode of Sex Here and Now, I explore something that has been on my mind lately: the tendency people have to judge other people's consensual sexual choices while avoiding deeper questions about their own relationship with sex. Whether the topic is kink, polyamory, queer relationships, casual sex, body confidence, or simply people expressing themselves authentically, judgment often shows up faster than curiosity. Together, we unpack where that judgment comes from. Is it really about the behavior itself? Or is it more about fear, shame, insecurity, confusion, or unresolved beliefs that get activated when we see someone living differently than we do? Often, what we criticize in others has far more to do with our own discomfort than their actual choices. We discuss the concept of "don't yuck someone else's yum" and why consensual sexual experiences between adults are rarely the problem people think they are. We also explore how religion, family systems, social media, culture, and sex negative messaging shape our reactions to sexuality and influence what we perceive as acceptable, normal, or threatening. In this episode, we discuss:• Why people judge other people's sex lives• Fear, shame, and sexual discomfort• Projection and sexual criticism• Kink, polyamory, and queer relationships• The impact of sex negative messaging• Curiosity versus judgment• Exploring your own relationship with sexuality• The role of self-awareness in sexual growth• Why consensual sexuality often triggers strong reactions• The difference between "that's not for me" and "that's wrong" One of the most important takeaways from this conversation is that curiosity often creates more growth than criticism. The next time you find yourself judging someone else's sexuality, it may be worth asking what that reaction is trying to tell you about your own experiences, beliefs, fears, or desires. If this episode resonates with you, consider following the podcast, leaving a review, and sharing it with someone who may benefit from the conversation. Your support helps spread more sex positive, shame reducing, and research informed conversations into the world. As always, stay curious. Resources If you’re looking for a high-quality lubricant that actually enhances the experience instead of distracting from it, I’ve got you covered. 👉 Click here to try Überlube When you use that link, you’ll receive a Free Überlube Sachet added to your order (U.S. only). Using the link also helps support the podcast, so it’s a win-win. Are you a healthcare professional or mental health therapist and looking for sex therapy continuing education? Get 10% of your first course here by using code podcast10 A list of sex education, sex therapy, and relationship resources here Sign up for my online class here You can now watch the full video podcast on YouTube! Let's get social: Website / Instagram / YouTube Please make sure to subscribe and rate my podcast!

In this mini episode of Matt’s Musings, I’m diving into a topic that continues to spark curiosity, confusion, and meaningful cultural change: the rise in people identifying as bisexual. Recent research suggests that about 7 percent of people now identify as bisexual, and rather than asking why it is increasing, this episode explores a more important question. What happens when people finally feel safe enough to tell the truth about who they are? I talk about the history of bisexuality being misunderstood or dismissed as a phase, the unique pressures bisexual individuals have faced from both heterosexual and queer communities, and why this shift reflects something much bigger than a trend. It signals growing safety, expanding conversations around sexual fluidity, and younger generations feeling less pressure to fit into rigid identity boxes. This episode is a reminder that sexuality has always been more expansive than many of us were taught. As stigma softens and acceptance grows, more people are allowing themselves curiosity, self understanding, and authenticity without shame. If you have ever questioned labels, wondered about sexual fluidity, or simply want to better understand the evolving landscape of human sexuality, this short musing invites you to stay curious and compassionate toward yourself and others. Are you a healthcare professional or mental health therapist and looking for sex therapy continuing education? Get 10% of your first course here by using code podcast10 A list of sex education, sex therapy, and relationship resources here Sign up for my online class here You can now watch the full video podcast on YouTube! Let's get social: Website / Instagram / YouTube Please make sure to subscribe and rate my podcast!

A new study suggests that more than a quarter of Americans are interested in open relationships and honestly, my jaw hit the floor. Not because non monogamy is better than monogamy, but because it tells us something much bigger about where relationships are headed. In this episode, I explore what this growing interest in non monogamous relationships actually means for modern dating, intimacy, and personal identity. We talk about why relationship styles are not in competition with each other, how insecurity often fuels unnecessary debates between monogamy and non monogamy, and why there is room for everyone to build relationships that genuinely fit their lives. I also dive into how cultural shifts are changing the way we think about love. From the loosening grip of purity culture to increasing relational curiosity, more people are questioning inherited relationship scripts and asking a powerful question: What do I actually want? This episode is not about convincing anyone to open their relationship. It is about intentionality, self awareness, and choosing connection from authenticity rather than obligation. Whether you practice monogamy, non monogamy, or are simply curious, this conversation invites you to rethink how we define healthy relationships in a modern world. Cheers to building connections that are ethical, consensual, and truly aligned with who we are. Are you a healthcare professional or mental health therapist and looking for sex therapy continuing education? Get 10% of your first course here by using code podcast10 A list of sex education, sex therapy, and relationship resources here Sign up for my online class here You can now watch the full video podcast on YouTube! Let's get social: Website / Instagram / YouTube Please make sure to subscribe and rate my podcast!

Welcome to my series of mini-episodes that I call Matt’s Musings. These episodes will be short, focused, and center on tips and tricks relating to human sexuality that I think are important for all of us to know and understand. And hey, you now get to hear me more often? What a treat! Today, I am roasting the idea of soulmates and making it more open to our growth as humans. New full-length episodes dropping every week! “Matt’s Musings” episodes dropping every other week! Looking for sex therapy continuing education? Get 10% of your first course here by using code podcast10 A list of sex education, sex therapy, and relationship resources here Sign up for my online class here You can now watch the full video podcast on YouTube! Let's get social: Website / Instagram / YouTube Please make sure to subscribe and rate my podcast!