Stillness in the Storms

You have somewhere between thirty and forty thoughts a minute, and you never asked for a single one of them. So why do we lie there at three in the morning treating our own mind like it has done something wrong?This one is for the overthinker, the one who cannot find the off switch. The shift that changes everything is small and easy to miss. You are not the thought, you are the one who hears it. There is the thought, and there is the one who notices the thought, and they are not the same.Steven uses the image of a quiet railway station. Every thought is a train pulling in. Some are loud, some are quiet, some you have ridden a hundred times out of habit. The bit we forget is that you do not have to get on. You can stay on the bench and watch it roll out again.He also names the trap the spiritual crowd fall into. Watching your thoughts is not going cold, and it is not pretending nothing touches you. The one who watches still feels it. You can notice the storm and still be stood out in the weather getting soaked.At the heart of it is the gap. The tiny space between a thought arriving and you reacting to it. That gap is where your whole life actually happens, and widening it is what meditation is really for.So tonight, when the first train pulls in, try one sentence. Ah, there is a thought. That is it. You are already back on the bench.Companion meditationA short meditation goes with this episode, over on Inner Peace Meditations. Sit with it once or twice this week. It will do more than any amount of talking about it.Become the Watcher: A Meditation to Quiet an Overthinking Mind https://innerpeacemeditations.com/episode/become-the-watcher-a-meditation-to-quiet-an-overthinking-mindLinksReach Steven, the newsletter and everything else: stevenwebb.uk Inner Peace Meditations: innerpeacemeditations.com Leave a review on Apple or Spotify. It helps more people find a bit of calm in a hard week. Keep the podcast advert free: buymeacoffee.com/stevenwebbWith gratitude toAddie, Darren, Alice, Caroline and My Herb for keeping the show advert free this week, and to Sin, Annie, Laura, Adam, Dominique and Senga. A special thank you to Stuart, who hits two years as a monthly supporter this month. That is not a small thing.

Links to Steven Webb's podcast and how you can support his work.Donate paypal.me/stevenwebb or Coffee stevenwebb.ukSteven's courses, podcasts and links: stevenwebb.ukEpisode DescriptionFor years, you've been the go to person. The mother, the partner, the colleague, the carer. Your whole identity is wrapped up in what you do for others. But what happens when the kids leave, or the career changes, or you just stop long enough to ask… who am I underneath all of that?In this episode, Steven shares a personal story from his time as Mayor of Truro, where former mayors warned him about the strange emptiness that comes when a defining role ends. He explores why losing a role can feel like grief, why that "who am I now?" question is not a sign of ingratitude but an invitation to go deeper, and how you can start the quiet, beautiful process of meeting yourself again.If you've ever felt lost in the space between who you were and who you're becoming, this one is for you.In This EpisodeSteven talks about the identity we build from doing things for others and what happens when those roles shift or fade. He explores why this transition hurts so much and why grief and gratitude can exist side by side. He shares wisdom on sitting in the uncomfortable "in between" space rather than rushing to fill it. And he offers a simple five minute practice you can try today to begin reconnecting with who you really are beneath the roles.Key ThemesIdentity and midlife transitions. The grief of losing a role. Empty nest and changing family dynamics. Finding stillness in the not knowing. Meeting yourself again after decades of caring for others.Memorable Moment"You are not your roles. You never were. The mother, the carer, the professional, the person everyone depends on: those are things you do, and you do them beautifully. But they are not who you are. Who you are is the one who remains when all of that falls away. And she is still there. She's been waiting for you."Try This TodayFind five minutes of quiet. Sit with a cup of tea, go for a short walk, or sit somewhere peaceful. Ask yourself: "What would I do today if nobody needed anything from me?" Don't judge the answer. Just notice what comes up. That's a thread. Keep pulling gently on it and it will lead you back to yourself.Support This PodcastStillness in the Storms is completely free with no adverts and no sponsors. It exists because of the kind people who treat Steven to a coffee. Every contribution helps pay for the podcast and supports all of Steven's work.A huge thank you to this episode's supporters: Tiffany, Fran, Kay, Caroline, Ruth, Mazdak, Cara, Suja, and several generous anonymous donors, along with supporters on Insight Timer.If this episode helped you, please consider buying Steven a coffee. Even one makes a difference.About Steven WebbSteven Webb is a meditation teacher, former Mayor of Truro, and C5 tetraplegic. He has spent decades learning what it means to find peace in the most difficult circumstances. Through Stillness in the Storms, he offers honest, warm conversations to help people navigate life's hardest moments.Find out more and explore all of Steven's work at stevenwebb.ukConnectWebsite: https://stevenwebb.ukListen, subscribe, and leave a review on your favourite podcast app. Sharing this episode with someone who needs to hear it is one of the best ways to support the show.

Links to Steven Webb's podcast and how you can support his work.Donate paypal.me/stevenwebb or Coffee stevenwebb.ukSteven's courses, podcasts and links: stevenwebb.ukForget Resolutions: Why One Word Is All You Need This YearHappy New Year to you all! It is great to be back recording after a tough few weeks battling a severe chest infection. Before we dive into today’s episode, I want to say a massive thank you to everyone who supported me and donated over Christmas.Your kindness keeps this podcast ad-free and helps cover the editing and admin costs which allows me to keep going. A special shout out to Jessica, Laura, Catherine, Joan, Ulysses, Lisa, Kerry, and Audra. And wow, thank you to Joan and Ulysses for the 40 coffees! You are all absolutely brilliant.In this episode:I share a bit about my recent battle with "man flu" and the complications of dealing with a chest infection while being paralyzed. It was a stark reminder of how fragile things can be, leading to an ambulance visit and plenty of steroids.But this experience led me to my focus for this year. Instead of setting strict resolutions that we often break, I am inviting you to choose just one word for the year. My word is Simplify.We explore what it means to strip life down to its simplest form to remove obstacles and reduce suffering. Whether it is closing tabs on a browser or just sitting in silence, simplifying is about finding peace in the moment.We also talk about:Why I chose "Simplify" as my word for the year.The spiritual journey of reducing suffering and attachment.How to handle emotions like anxiety and overwhelm by listening to what they are teaching us.Examples of words you might choose, such as Acceptance, Trust, release, or Curiosity.What is your word for the year? I would love to hear it.Links and Contact: If you want to get in touch, share your word, or just say hello, you can message me directly at:https://stevenwebb.ukThank you for listening and for your continued support.

Links to Steven Webb's podcast and how you can support his work.Donate paypal.me/stevenwebb or Coffee stevenwebb.ukSteven's courses, podcasts and links: stevenwebb.ukToday, we're diving into the topic of inner peace and what it truly means. I share my personal journey of finding peace, especially after a life-changing injury that left me paralyzed. It’s not about always feeling good or avoiding pain; instead, it’s about recognizing that peace is always there beneath the chaos of life. I also unpack five common myths about inner peace that I used to believe, which held me back from truly understanding it. By the end of this episode, I hope to help you see how to tap into that inner calm, even when life gets tough. If you're curious to learn more, check out my website at https://stevenwebb.uk.In this episode of Stillness in the Storms, host Steven Webb shares his personal journey of finding inner peace after being paralyzed from the neck down. He offers practical wisdom and debunks common myths about what it means to be at peace, revealing that it's a state that is always accessible, even in the midst of life's greatest challenges.Benefits of Listening:Learn how to find inner peace, regardless of your external circumstances.Discover why you don't need to control your thoughts to be at peace.Understand that inner peace is not a permanent state, but a practice.Learn how to be fully present and engaged with life, without clinging or grasping.Be inspired by Stephen's story of resilience and hope.Key Quotes:"We are at peace when we're not suffering, or when we're doing something we enjoy.""Inner peace is always there. It's always present. A peaceful, quiet world is always present, even in the most dire circumstances.""You cannot wait until life calms down. You won't be able to have peace once life's sorted.""Peace means being fully present. It means without clinging and without that grasping."The Five Myths of Inner Peace:Inner peace means never feeling pain or discomfort.You must control your thoughts to be at peace.You find peace once life calms down.Inner peace is a permanent state.Peace means detachment from life.

Links to Steven Webb's podcast and how you can support his work.Donate paypal.me/stevenwebb or Coffee stevenwebb.ukSteven's courses, podcasts and links: stevenwebb.uk Episode DescriptionHave you ever felt adrift, wishing you had a wise and unconditionally loving guide to help you navigate life's storms? What if that guide was already inside you, waiting to be discovered?In this episode of Stillness in the Storms, Steven explores the transformative concept of "self-parenting," inspired by the work of Gabor Maté. This isn't about harsh discipline or re-living your childhood; it’s about learning to trade your harsh inner critic for a compassionate, wise, and loving inner parent.Discover how to identify the areas in your life—from procrastination and setting boundaries to health and self-talk—where this gentle inner guidance can bring more peace, accountability, and profound kindness. This episode is your invitation to cultivate the most supportive and empowering relationship you will ever have: the one with yourself.In This Episode, You Will Learn:What it truly means to "parent yourself" and why it's a powerful tool for personal growth and mental wellness.How to recognize the everyday moments where a kind, internal parent can help you make better choices (like getting out the door on time!).The crucial difference between self-criticism, which stifles growth, and self-acceptance, which creates the space for positive change.Practical areas where you can apply self-parenting today: managing your time, making healthier choices, and balancing work, life, and play.The most important role of your inner parent: offering yourself the unconditional love and reassurance you deserve, especially when you're struggling.Resources MentionedSupport the Podcast & Find More from Steven: Discover courses, meditations, and ways to support the show at https://stevenwebb.uk.Companion Meditations: Listen to guided meditations that accompany the podcast episodes on the Inner Peace Meditations podcast.Upcoming Course: Stay tuned for Steven's new 7-day audio course, "How to Find Peace in Busy Times."

Links to Steven Webb's podcast and how you can support his work.Donate paypal.me/stevenwebb or Coffee stevenwebb.ukSteven's courses, podcasts and links: stevenwebb.uk🧘 Episode SummaryIn this episode of Stillness in the Storms, I talk about attachment. It's one of the biggest causes of suffering, but I'm not here to tell you to let go. I think that advice is nonsense. What if instead of trying to let go, we simply allowed things to be as they are?I share what attachment has looked like in my life. From cigarettes to identity to the future I imagined that never arrived. You'll also hear from members of my WhatsApp group who told me what they find hardest to let go of. We cover nostalgia, self-worth, change, and why trying so hard is often the problem.This is not about giving everything up. It’s about loosening the grip, opening your hand, and allowing what comes and goes to just be.🎧 Why ListenYou are struggling to let go and nothing seems to workYou are attached to a past version of yourself or a future that never cameYou want a down-to-earth take on mindfulness and Buddhist teachings that make sense in real lifeYou are tired of chasing happiness and need space to breathe🌟 Quotes from the Episode“Letting go is pants. It doesn’t work. Just open your hand and let it be.”“You don’t have to give something up forever. Just give it up for one hour.”“You’re not a smoker who gave up. You’re just someone who didn’t smoke this hour.”“The minute you stop trying to be better, the better version of you starts to show up.”“Buddhism doesn’t say don’t love. It says don’t cling.”“Enjoy the moment but don’t become attached to it. Let it come and go.”☕ Thank YouThis podcast is free and always will be because of the people who support it. I do not run adverts. That’s a choice I make so you can tune in and hear what I have to say without interruption.Huge thanks toSenga – your five coffees came in just as I hit recordMichael, Dominique, Ulysses – yes, you bought 34 coffees, you legendNick, Julie, and Anne – thank you so muchAnd to all my monthly supporters – I see you and I’m deeply gratefulIf you want to support the show and keep it advert-free, the link is in the notes. Supporters also get access to the private WhatsApp group where I share new meditations and episodes first, and where we talk honestly about the stuff that matters.

Links to Steven Webb's podcast and how you can support his work.Donate paypal.me/stevenwebb or Coffee stevenwebb.ukSteven's courses, podcasts and links: stevenwebb.ukMeditation that goes with this podcast: A Dharma Meditation Beyond OverthinkingOverthinking Is Not Your Fault (But Here's How to Stop)In this episode of 'Stillness in the Storms', host Steven Webb explores the concept that we are not our thoughts. He discusses how thoughts arise from the subconscious mind and how we can learn to observe them without attachment. Through personal anecdotes and insights into meditation, he emphasizes the importance of awareness in managing overthinking and anxiety. The episode encourages listeners to become observers of their thoughts and to choose which thoughts to engage with, ultimately leading to a more peaceful and mindful existence.TakeawaysYou are not your thoughts; you have thoughts, but they do not define you.The subconscious mind generates thoughts that can be observed without attachment.Meditation helps in recognizing the distinction between thoughts and awareness.Negative thoughts are a natural part of human experience and survival.Choosing which thoughts to engage with can change your mental trajectory.Awareness of thoughts allows for greater control over emotional responses.Thoughts often originate from external influences, not just personal experiences.You can smile at your thoughts and not take them seriously.The journey to awareness often involves exploring different spiritual practices.Your subconscious mind is designed to support you and bring forth thoughts that align with your desires.

Links to Steven Webb's podcast and how you can support his work.Donate paypal.me/stevenwebb or Coffee stevenwebb.ukSteven's courses, podcasts and links: stevenwebb.ukSelf-acceptance is key, and today we dive into how Zen teaches us to stop needing to fix our lives. We explore what Zen really means and how we can apply it to our daily routines without it just being some trendy catchphrase. Through this episode, we challenge the idea that our lives are broken and discuss the importance of embracing the present moment as it is. I share personal stories and insights on how Zen can help us find peace amidst chaos. So, let’s sit back, relax, and learn how to just be in our moments without the urge to change everything around us.Self acceptance is a journey we all navigate, and in this episode, Steven Webb dives deep into the concept of Zen and how it relates to our everyday lives. He shares a powerful quote: "Zen doesn't fix your life; it stops you needing to." This sets the stage for a conversation about what Zen truly means. It's not just a trendy phrase or a meme we see online; it's about embracing the present moment and realizing that life is not broken, but rather, we often feel the urge to fix things that don't need fixing. Steven invites listeners to explore how to incorporate Zen into their lives, focusing on being present and accepting ourselves as we are. He emphasizes that life is full of challenges, but rather than trying to change everything, we can learn to sit with our experiences and recognize that suffering is part of being human. By adopting a Zen mindset, we can find peace in the chaos and appreciate the beauty of the moment without the constant need for improvement.Takeaways: Zen doesn't fix your life but helps you stop needing to fix it. Being present in the moment allows you to accept life as it is right now. The desire to always fix things can lead to never-ending dissatisfaction in life. Happiness is not an achievement but an experience that happens in the mundane.