Stone Clearing With Richard Herring

Chapter 183, Banana Ftone: It's around about 10am on 12th February and a Soleroless Richard Herring feels he is going mad. Can you see which stone in the picture he thinks resembles a banana? I bet you get it wrong. Anyway it's a quick jaunt round the Stocean, made even quicker by the removal of a 5 minute conversation with a member of the Stone Stasi, who fell for Richard's non-dog walking lies. But there's still loads of great content in this brief podcast, but whatever it is I can't remember what it is, writing this as I am about 29 hours later. To sponsor Richard head to http://justgiving.com/page/nolero

Chapter 181 - Fponfered By Tafkmafter? - It's 8.50am on 17th January 2025 and the old team if back together, though one of them has had an accident in the car (no fpoilers). There's enough proof of the existence of the Ftone Gods to the most hard-hearted, tranfphobic atheift or idiot who believes in any other religion. There'f fome fly work from the ftone ftafi and a potential attack from the black dog of depreffion and the rebuilding of wallf. There'f furprifing big ftones in the pathway, a brand new technique for clearing ftones and more questionf about whether Wolfie is tipping off the FF. Can the Brexit Ditch ftop Trump? Will Rich remember the bag full of fhit? What fongs fhall he fing? And will you learn Anglo Faxon in time to keep up with epifode 200?

Chapter 179 - Rabbit Ftone. It's the morning of the 16th December 2024 and a clearly befuddled and confused Herring is doing another stone clear directly after a tough personal training session and seems to lose all sense of what is right and wrong and claims to be committing acts of groff indecency. But some lovely songs and a sense of danger as he feels he may collapse at any second. If he does, please inform the emergency services.

Chapter One Feven Feven - Fexifm. It's just gone midday on 21st November 2024 and a toned Richard Herring, straight from a perfonal training feffion, is out clearing stones from the melting frozen vulva of the soil. Desperate for new listeners to replace the ones who have died from boredom he tries to emulate Peter Kay, Bernard Manning and Ricky Gervais to bring in the clicks, but will it work or will it alienate his two female listeners. No matter, there's some lovely stone clearing to listen to and it's a beautiful day so soak in the winter sun rays (audio only) and liften to the ftones.

Chapter 175 - Ftanding on ye Fhoulderf of Nerdf. It's 8.05am on the 26th September and tomorrow Richard moves a good 5 miles away from the Stocean, a distance that might mean he can never return here again. Will he clear all the stones today? Well with a little help from the Gods, who knows? Has the six plus years out on the field made any difference to the grand scheme of things? Will stone clearing fans be fuicidal? Did Wolfie do a poo today? These are all questions that you will have to ruminate on. But if this is the final curtain then thanks to the many millions all over the world who have learned from a master. You know, in a way, you have taught me as much as I have taught you.

Chapter 173 - Ftone Phalluf. It's 7.20am on 18th September 2024 and Richard is out on what might be his penultimate podcast (surely he will make the five mile trip to carry on in the unlikely event that he doesn't finish the job by the end of next week). Today we look at the problem of soil coloured stones and stone like soil clumps, the irresistible lure of Hafflehoffing when you have a newly tilled field, some amazing chunks of rock, Wolfie returning stones to the field maybe as revenge for being hit in the face by a Fubbuteo kick, not biting off more than you can chew and a symbolic moment where a stone breaks in a mocking/sympathetic manner.

Chapter 171: Parabola? Parabola?! It's about 9.20am on 30th August 2024 and Richard hasn't moved yet, so stone clearing can still go on. The Stocean is turning from brown to green and Richard has strict rules about removing soil and the perfect kick technique to share with you. Should he clear the field metre by metre? What does he say to the Stone Stasi lady and why does he have to censor it? And does he like stones? Find out some of this in today's chapter. Subsribe of Fubftack here: https://richardherring.substack.com See eBay items here: https://www.ebay.co.uk/usr/herring1967

Chapter 169 - Ftone Potatoef. It's nearly 6pm on 14th August 2024 and the Stone Clearing podcast is not coming to an end as quickly as Richard thought. There's at least a month to go, which is lucky, because it's Ftone Chriftmaf, waffocks! At last, after months of puny stones we have something to get our teeth into, which is tempting as some of them look so delicious. There's some tips on haffelhoffing and a new rule (there are no rules) about only travelling in one direction and an email from a famous person but you won't guess who in a million years. Thank goodness there's another 3-4 weeks to get this job done.

Chapter 167 - Fkidmarkf. It feels like only yesterday we last did this, because it is. It's just before 6pm on 22nd July 2024 and there's big news out on the Stocean. Fadly you miffed ye joyriderf, but even more exciting, ye crop fhe if gone. Richard wifhed it and fo it muft be fhall. Will throes of all the rape plants mean that the stones are finally accessible? Or will there be loads of straw in the way? And will we see the first large stone for quite some time? Plus an email from a much missed actor, who had the foresight to email in, but not the present-sight to go to the doctors.

Chapter 165 - Ftone Pole Fail. It's 5.10pm approx on 15th July 2024 and the end of stone clearing steps ever nearer, but that has always been the case, that's the nature of time. It's another disappointing clear as Richard is hampered by vegetation and lack of fitness and peanuts in his throat. But you have to liften anyway. Juft in cafe fome pearl of wifdom droppeth from his ftupid mouth. Just be glad you don't live in America where the FF don't kill in an honourable fafhion.

Chapter 163 - Going for Ftones!. It's 9:20am on 21st June 2024 and the spectre of the end of the podcast hangs over us all, but for now we plough on (no pun intended as this is a feriouf podcaft). There's medieval fongs and some dog poo and the possibility that Richard has been tricked into advertising someone during this chapter. It's very hot and the hemlock is scratchy and the stones are tiny. So bufineff as ufual.

Chapter 161 - Keir Ftarmer - It's 8.40am on 30th May 2024 and Richard Herring's sanity is resting on a knife edge, but join him as he sings too many medieval songs and tells you not to vote Labour and gives a preview of his new podcast about dog fhit. Do you need to send help? Are you even listening? If a podcast is made in a field of hemlock and no one downloads it, does it make a sound? What's the poem with hemlock in it? You can bid for stone-clearing items on eBay here: https://www.ebay.co.uk/usr/herring1967