The BPD Bunch

Have you ever confused emotional intensity with intimacy?In this episode of The BPD Bunch, Xannie, Justin, Andre, Carys, and Mo continue their conversation about BPD and intimacy, this time focusing on what actually helped them build healthier relationships in recovery.They talk about fear, jealousy, abandonment panic, choosing chaotic people because stability felt boring, learning not to punish people before having hard conversations, and realizing that love does not have to feel like emotional survival.This season, we’re discussing BPD through the lens of the Alternative Model of Personality Disorders (AMPD). Under the AMPD, difficulties with intimacy are considered part of impairments in interpersonal functioning, alongside empathy. To meet criteria for BPD in this model, a person must have difficulties in at least two areas of personality functioning: identity, self direction, empathy, or intimacy, along with four or more pathological personality traits, which we’ll be discussing in more detail later this season.Topics include:* BPD and intimacy* Fear of abandonment* Trust issues in relationships* Jealousy and BPD* Push pull relationships* Emotional permanence* BPD recovery* Healthy relationships with BPDIf you’ve ever wanted closeness while also panicking the second it started to feel real, this episode is for you.In the first two episodes of the season, Dr. Carla Sharp, Dr. Frank Yeomans, and Dr. Alex Stein explain what the AMPD is, how it changes from the current categorical model, and how the BPD diagnosis is changing. ⸻ 🌟 Love what we do? Your support fuels these important conversations on BPD and mental health. Consider joining our Patreon community to help us continue this valuable work and unlock exclusive content. Every contribution makes a difference! 🌈✨ 🔗 Support us on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/thebpdbunch ________About Us: The BPD bunch is a YouTube talk show, featuring a panel of people who are in functional recovery from Borderline Personality Disorder. Each week we discuss BPD-related topics to help give you insights into the different ways BPD can be expressed in someone’s life. We also cover the different paths we followed on our recovery journeys to give you hope and direction for your own ❤️ Thank you for being on this journey of healing with us!________Disclaimer:This video is for education only and is not meant to provide professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment.

Can someone with BPD feel other people’s emotions so intensely that it actually starts getting in the way of empathy?In this episode of The BPD Bunch, Xannie, Georgette, André, Solène, and Katja continue their conversation about BPD and empathy by exploring the difference between emotionally feeling with someone and actually understanding what they need. They share their top tips, lessons and skills they use to navigate empathy more effectively.In case you're new here, this season, we’re discussing BPD through the lens of the Alternative Model of Personality Disorders (AMPD). Under the AMPD, difficulties with empathy are considered part of impairments in interpersonal functioning, alongside intimacy. To meet criteria for BPD in this model, a person must have difficulties in at least two areas of personality functioning: identity, self direction, empathy, or intimacy, along with four or more pathological personality traits, which we’ll be discussing in more detail later this season.In this episode:* BPD and empathy* Cognitive vs affective empathy* Emotional mirroring* Rejection sensitivity* Social paranoia* Problem solving vs listening* Emotion regulation and empathy* “Feeling everything” with BPD* The empathy trap* Learning to ask what people needIf you’ve ever absorbed other people’s emotions, assumed you knew what someone needed, taken neutrality personally, or felt emotionally overwhelmed in relationships, this episode is for you.In the first two episodes of the season, Dr. Carla Sharp, Dr. Frank Yeomans, and Dr. Alex Stein explain what the AMPD is, how it changes from the current categorical model, and how the BPD diagnosis is changing. In case you missed it, here are the links:Watch part 1 hereWatch part 2 here⸻ 🌟 Love what we do? Your support fuels these important conversations on BPD and mental health. Consider joining our Patreon community to help us continue this valuable work and unlock exclusive content. Every contribution makes a difference! 🌈✨ 🔗 Support us on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/thebpdbunch ________About Us: The BPD bunch is a YouTube talk show, featuring a panel of people who are in functional recovery from Borderline Personality Disorder. Each week we discuss BPD-related topics to help give you insights into the different ways BPD can be expressed in someone’s life. We also cover the different paths we followed on our recovery journeys to give you hope and direction for your own ❤️ Thank you for being on this journey of healing with us!________Disclaimer:This video is for education only and is not meant to provide professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment.

Do you struggle to know what you want, stick with a path, or trust your own choices?In this episode of The BPD Bunch, Xannie, Madhurima, Carys and Solène continue their discussion of BPD and self-direction through the lens of the Alternative Model for Personality Disorders (AMPD), exploring how goals, values, identity, relationships, and recovery can all affect the way we build a life.Under the AMPD, difficulties with self-direction are considered part of impairments in self functioning, alongside identity. To meet criteria for BPD in this model, a person must have difficulties in at least two areas of personality functioning: identity, self direction, empathy, or intimacy, along with four or more pathological personality traits, which we’ll be discussing in more detail later this season.This episode is for anyone with BPD who has ever wondered why it can feel so hard to know who you are, what you want, or where you’re going.We talk about:* BPD and self-direction* changing goals, values, and interests* favorite people and life decisions* identity, emptiness, and sense of self* perfectionism, recovery, and self-acceptance* learning how to follow through without getting trapped* finding direction while still allowing yourself to changeThis is part of our Season 7 series where we’re breaking BPD down in a more real, human way while also connecting it to newer ways of understanding personality.Follow Xannie and Solene's music journey ⁨@Nxi-Sol⁩ In the first two episodes of the season, Dr. Carla Sharp, Dr. Frank Yeomans, and Dr. Alex Stein explained what the AMPD is, how it changes from the current categorical model, and how the BPD diagnosis is changing. Part 1Part 2⸻ 🌟 Love what we do? Your support fuels these important conversations on BPD and mental health. Consider joining our Patreon community to help us continue this valuable work and unlock exclusive content. Every contribution makes a difference! 🌈✨ 🔗 Support us on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/thebpdbunch ________About Us: The BPD bunch is a YouTube talk show, featuring a panel of people who are in functional recovery from Borderline Personality Disorder. Each week we discuss BPD-related topics to help give you insights into the different ways BPD can be expressed in someone’s life. We also cover the different paths we followed on our recovery journeys to give you hope and direction for your own ❤️ Thank you for being on this journey of healing with us!________Disclaimer:This video is for education only and is not meant to provide professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment.

What happens when BPD affects your goals, career choices, and sense of direction in life?In this episode of The BPD Bunch, Xannie, Madhurima, Carys, and Solène talk about self-direction through the lens of the Alternative Model for Personality Disorders. Under the AMPD, difficulties with self-direction are considered part of impairments in self functioning, alongside identity. To meet criteria for BPD in this model, a person must have difficulties in at least two areas of personality functioning: identity, self direction, empathy, or intimacy, along with four or more pathological personality traits, which we’ll be discussing in more detail later this season.We explore:• why people with BPD may struggle to stick with one job or career• constantly changing direction and starting over• tying your identity to work and what happens when that falls apart• being influenced by other people’s goals or expectations• the belief that if it’s “right,” it should feel easy• how self-direction connects to identity and recoveryIf you’ve ever asked yourself “what am I doing with my life?” and felt like the answer keeps changing, this episode is for you.This is part of our Season 7 series where we’re breaking BPD down through the lens of the Alternative Model of Personality Disorders.In the first two episodes of the season, Dr. Carla Sharp, Dr. Frank Yeomans, and Dr. Alex Stein explained what the AMPD is, how it changes from the current categorical model, and how the BPD diagnosis is changing. In case you missed it, here are the links:Part 1Part 2⸻ 🌟 Love what we do? Your support fuels these important conversations on BPD and mental health. Consider joining our Patreon community to help us continue this valuable work and unlock exclusive content. Every contribution makes a difference! 🌈✨ 🔗 Support us on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/thebpdbunch ________About Us: The BPD bunch is a YouTube talk show, featuring a panel of people who are in functional recovery from Borderline Personality Disorder. Each week we discuss BPD-related topics to help give you insights into the different ways BPD can be expressed in someone’s life. We also cover the different paths we followed on our recovery journeys to give you hope and direction for your own ❤️ Thank you for being on this journey of healing with us!________Disclaimer:This video is for education only and is not meant to provide professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment.

What does identity instability’s actually feel like in BPD?In this episode of The BPD Bunch, Xannie, Carys, Solène, André, and Katja, start looking at identity through the lens of the Alternative Model for Personality Disorders (AMPD). It’s a way of understanding BPD that focuses more on patterns and functioning, not just labels. Under the AMPD, difficulties with identity are considered part of impairments in self functioning, alongside self-direction. To meet criteria for BPD in this model, a person must have difficulties in at least two areas of personality functioning: identity, self direction, empathy, or intimacy, along with four or more pathological personality traits, which we’ll be discussing in more detail later this season.If you’ve ever had that “who even am I?” moment… yeah. This is that episode.We talk about: • what it’s like to feel like you don’t have a solid sense of self • why you might feel like you don’t know who you are • masking and becoming whoever you need to be to avoid rejection • losing yourself in relationships, jobs, or even your diagnosis • when BPD starts to feel like your whole identity • how identity struggles show up in everyday lifeThis is part of our Season 7 series where we’re breaking BPD down in a more real, human way while also connecting it to newer ways of understanding personality.In the first two episodes of the season, Dr. Carla Sharp, Dr. Frank Yeomans, and Dr. Alex Stein explained what the AMPD is, how it changes from the current categorical model, and how the BPD diagnosis is changing. In case you missed it, here are the links:Part 1Part 2⸻ 🌟 Love what we do? Your support fuels these important conversations on BPD and mental health. Consider joining our Patreon community to help us continue this valuable work and unlock exclusive content. Every contribution makes a difference! 🌈✨ 🔗 Support us on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/thebpdbunch ________About Us: The BPD bunch is a YouTube talk show, featuring a panel of people who are in functional recovery from Borderline Personality Disorder. Each week we discuss BPD-related topics to help give you insights into the different ways BPD can be expressed in someone’s life. We also cover the different paths we followed on our recovery journeys to give you hope and direction for your own ❤️ Thank you for being on this journey of healing with us!________Disclaimer:This video is for education only and is not meant to provide professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment.

Hey…This isn’t the video we planned for today.This past week, I lost my dog. And I needed a little more time than I expected to get back on my feet.I thought about just skipping this upload entirely, but there was something in this experience that felt important to share. Especially when it comes to what recovery from BPD actually looks like in real life.There’s this idea that recovery means things won’t hurt as much anymore. And I’ve found that it’s not exactly that simple. A lot of emotional contexts can and do change drastically in recovery, and it's possible to get to a point that feels emotionally stable most of the time.But one of the universal human truths is that if you care a lot about someone or some creature, losing them will be painful. No amount of recovery will erase the grief process. And there's nothing abnormal or disordered about you if you feel the pain of loss.So this video is a bit different from the usual, it’s just where I’m at right now and something I didn’t think we talk about enough.Thank you for being here, seriously. I’ll be back to our regular episodes next week.If you do want the more in-depth version of what’s been going on, I shared that over on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/posts/i-had-to-put-my-155040984(this one is available to free members as well!)❤️ Xannie_____🌟 Love what we do? Your support fuels these important conversations on BPD and mental health. Consider joining our Patreon community to help us continue this valuable work and unlock exclusive content. Every contribution makes a difference! 🌈✨ 🔗 Support us on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/thebpdbunch ________About Us: The BPD bunch is a YouTube talk show, featuring a panel of people who are in functional recovery from Borderline Personality Disorder. Each week we discuss BPD-related topics to help give you insights into the different ways BPD can be expressed in someone’s life. We also cover the different paths we followed on our recovery journeys to give you hope and direction for your own ❤️ Thank you for being on this journey of healing with us!________Disclaimer:This video is for education only and is not meant to provide professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment.

What if Borderline Personality Disorder isn’t just a checklist of symptoms?In this episode of The BPD Bunch, we explore the Alternative Model for Personality Disorders (AMPD), a framework that shifts how we understand BPD from a set of categories to patterns of functioning, severity, and relationships.Joined by leading clinicians in the field, we break down what’s changing, why it matters, and how this model could reshape diagnosis, treatment, and stigma.This is Part 1 of a 2-part series.⸻Featuring:Dr. Carla Sharp — Clinical psychologist and Professor at the University of Houston. Director of the Developmental Psychopathology Lab, with a focus on personality disorders, mentalization, and adolescent development.Dr. Frank Yeomans — Clinical Professor of Psychiatry at Weill Cornell Medical College and Director of Training at the Personality Disorders Institute. Internationally recognized for his work in Transference-Focused Psychotherapy (TFP).Dr. Alex Stein — Clinical psychologist, researcher, and advocate known for her work on attachment patterns and “favorite person” relationships in BPD.⸻Subscribe for Part 2 where we break down what BPD actually looks like under this model.🌟 Love what we do? Your support fuels these important conversations on BPD and mental health. Consider joining our Patreon community to help us continue this valuable work and unlock exclusive content. Every contribution makes a difference! 🌈✨ 🔗 Support us on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/thebpdbunch ________About Us: The BPD bunch is a YouTube talk show, featuring a panel of people who are in functional recovery from Borderline Personality Disorder. Each week we discuss BPD-related topics to help give you insights into the different ways BPD can be expressed in someone’s life. We also cover the different paths we followed on our recovery journeys to give you hope and direction for your own ❤️ Thank you for being on this journey of healing with us!________Disclaimer:This video is for education only and is not meant to provide professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment.

In this episode of The BPD Bunch, Xannie and Carys chat with Katja about publishing her first book “Sorry, My Mental Illness Isn’t Sexy Enough for You”, going straight for the parts of BPD people never say out loud: shame, “unsexy” symptoms, misdiagnosis, self-sabotage, and why BPD can look totally different from person to person (quiet vs loud presentations, comorbidities, and stigma).If you’ve ever felt like “I don’t look like the BPD stereotype”… this one might feel like a hug.Here's a quote from co-cauthor Kay on why she wrote the book:"Sorry my mental illness isn’t sexy enough for you, started out as the title of a blog I wanted to write after witnessing first-hand the difficulties of having mental illness, lack of support and the prevalence of poor treatment. Naturally, I wanted to make a difference but being unwell, combined with my human nature of not being a starter finisher, it lived as an idea in my head for a while. Then came along came Katja with this amazing idea of launching our own mental health project using the name, which is the website we know and love today. If you had told me our little project would be as successful as it has been and that we would be publishing our first book because of it, I would have laughed, but here we are. I’m so incredibly lucky to have been given this opportunity to achieve my wildest dream, and to achieve it with my best friend. Asking why I wrote the book is multifaceted, since the age of 14 I have been involved in Mental Health Activism with the purpose of reducing suffering in people who experience mental health difficulties. I raised awareness in a variety of projects and focused on bringing together people with lived experience and services to work together to improve mental health services. I wanted the book to share my story so that others do not feel alone, and so that I could provide understanding and hope, and to talk about ways people can have agency over their own recovery. Mental illness can sometimes be seen as a moral failing, especially the ‘unsexy ones’ that we spend our days challenging. I absolutely feel called to break down this dangerous concept that divides people and communities. I didn't write the book to be cathartic, but I think the process has provided relief in some ways – taking painful and difficult experiences and turning them into something that can help others."Buy the Book

The holidays can hit different when you’re living with Borderline Personality Disorder.In this impromptu holiday episode of The BPD Bunch, Xannie, Georgette and Jack talk honestly about the parts of the season that are rarely acknowledged; financial stress, loneliness, family dynamics, oversharing, feeling “off” at gatherings, and the quiet grief of holidays not looking the way you wish they did.We also share what’s actually helped us get through it: neutral responses when people ask how you’re doing, finding small moments of joy, community rituals, opposite action, and learning how to stay present without forcing “holiday cheer.”If you’ve ever thought, “Why is this so hard for me when everyone else seems fine?” this conversation is for you.💛 Want more support?On our Patreon, you’ll find extended cuts, deleted scenes, exclusive episodes, and practical skills videos designed to help you navigate BPD in real life—not just survive it.👉 Join us on Patreon for deeper conversations and tools that help. https://www.patreon.com/thebpdbunch Leave your questions in the comments—we love answering them in future videos.________About Us: The BPD bunch is a YouTube talk show, featuring a panel of people who are in functional recovery from Borderline Personality Disorder. Each week we discuss BPD-related topics to help give you insights into the different ways BPD can be expressed in someone’s life. We also cover the different paths we followed on our recovery journeys to give you hope and direction for your own ❤️ Thank you for being on this journey of healing with us!________Disclaimer:Although several of our panelists work in the mental health field, we are all coming to you as people in functional recovery from BPD, and are not here to provide professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment.

Wrapping up their conversation from Wednesday. Xannie, Carys, Céline, Jack, Darren, and Solène share personal experiences, revealing the challenges that come with maintaining self-care routines amidst the emotional turmoil of BPD. Whether you're a person with BPD or a loved one seeking to understand, this episode is packed with relatable insights and powerful discussions. Discover what self-care truly means, the obstacles we face, and how to foster compassion over judgment in our journeys. Don’t forget to hit like, subscribe, and turn on notifications for more transformative content🌟 Love what we do? Your support fuels these important conversations on BPD and mental health. Consider joining our Patreon community to help us continue this valuable work and unlock exclusive content. Every contribution makes a difference! 🌈✨ 🔗 Support us on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/thebpdbunch ________About Us: The BPD bunch is a YouTube talk show, featuring a panel of people who are in functional recovery from Borderline Personality Disorder. Each week we discuss BPD-related topics to help give you insights into the different ways BPD can be expressed in someone’s life. We also cover the different paths we followed on our recovery journeys to give you hope and direction for your own ❤️ Thank you for being on this journey of healing with us!________Disclaimer: Although several of our panelists work in the mental health field, we are all coming to you as people in functional recovery from BPD, and are not here to provide professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment.

Xannie and Katja hear from special guest, Nasiba, who shares her harrowing journey of trauma, self-discovery, and healing as someone living with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD). From childhood abuse to the struggles of adulthood, her candid storytelling reveals how cultural perceptions of mental health can complicate recovery. Join us as we explore the emotional rollercoaster of BPD, discuss self-destructive behaviors, and celebrate the journey toward self-acceptance and forgiveness. This episode is not just for those living with BPD but also for friends and family seeking to understand. Don’t miss the insights that could change lives!🌟 Love what we do? Your support fuels these important conversations on BPD and mental health. Consider joining our Patreon community to help us continue this valuable work and unlock exclusive content. Every contribution makes a difference! 🌈✨ 🔗 Support us on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/thebpdbunch ________About Us: The BPD bunch is a YouTube talk show, featuring a panel of people who are in functional recovery from Borderline Personality Disorder. Each week we discuss BPD-related topics to help give you insights into the different ways BPD can be expressed in someone’s life. We also cover the different paths we followed on our recovery journeys to give you hope and direction for your own ❤️ Thank you for being on this journey of healing with us!________Disclaimer:Although several of our panelists work in the mental health field, we are all coming to you as people in functional recovery from BPD, and are not here to provide professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment.

THANK YOU to our BPD Besties on Patreon for voting on this topic and joining us behind the scenes during filming! We always have a blast with you.In this episode, Xannie, Jay, André, Georgette and Katja share personal stories, struggles, and insights about the impact of BPD on their ability to maintain a structured life. The Bunch cover both extremes; the difficulties that come from being overly rigid with structure, as well as the struggles to maintain any structure at all.Whether you’re battling BPD yourself or supporting someone who is, this episode is packed with relatable experiences and valuable advice that may just change your perspective. Don't miss out on this emotional journey filled with laughter, hard truths, and important takeaways. Check out the shortcut to Lena's intro video to see what Xannie was referencing!Friday we’ll be back to share our top tips for maintaining structure. Hit that subscribe button to stay connected!May 21st we'll be back to talk about BPD & Structure. Can't wait until then? Sign up for our "BPD Buddies" or "BPD Besties" tiers on Patreon to get early access to an exclusive extended cut of next week's episode NOW! https://www.patreon.com/thebpdbunch 🌟 Love what we do? Your support fuels these important conversations on BPD and mental health. Consider joining our Patreon community to help us continue this valuable work and unlock exclusive content. Every contribution makes a difference! 🌈✨ 🔗 Support us on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/thebpdbunch ________About Us: The BPD bunch is a YouTube talk show, featuring a panel of people who are in functional recovery from Borderline Personality Disorder. Each week we discuss BPD-related topics to help give you insights into the different ways BPD can be expressed in someone’s life. We also cover the different paths we followed on our recovery journeys to give you hope and direction for your own ❤️ Thank you for being on this journey of healing with us!________Disclaimer:Although several of our panelists work in the mental health field, we are all coming to you as people in functional recovery from BPD, and are not here to provide professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment.

Wrapping up their conversation from Wednesday Xannie, Carys, André, and Katja share their personal revelations and experiences, exploring the hidden triggers that lead to self-destructive behaviors. The Bunch discuss how moments of clarity can spark meaningful change and the importance of recognizing when we are our own worst enemies. Whether you're living with BPD or supporting someone who is, this episode offers valuable insights and encouragement. Don't miss out on the chance to better understand yourself or your loved ones in this journey of healing and self-acceptance. Hit that subscribe button and turn on notifications so you never miss an episode!May 14th we'll be back with our PATRON'S VOTE Episode, on BPD & Structure! Can't wait until then? Sign up for our "BPD Buddies" or "BPD Besties" tiers on Patreon to get early access to an exclusive extended cut of next week's episode NOW! https://www.patreon.com/thebpdbunch 🌟 Love what we do? Your support fuels these important conversations on BPD and mental health. Consider joining our Patreon community to help us continue this valuable work and unlock exclusive content. Every contribution makes a difference! 🌈✨ 🔗 Support us on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/thebpdbunch ________About Us: The BPD bunch is a YouTube talk show, featuring a panel of people who are in functional recovery from Borderline Personality Disorder. Each week we discuss BPD-related topics to help give you insights into the different ways BPD can be expressed in someone’s life. We also cover the different paths we followed on our recovery journeys to give you hope and direction for your own ❤️ Thank you for being on this journey of healing with us!________Disclaimer:Although several of our panelists work in the mental health field, we are all coming to you as people in functional recovery from BPD, and are not here to provide professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment.